Citation
A Bad boy's first reader

Material Information

Title:
A Bad boy's first reader
Creator:
Bellew, Frank, 1828-1888
Bellew, Frank, 1828-1888 ( Illustrator )
G.W. Carleton & Co ( Publisher )
Place of Publication:
New York
Publisher:
G.W. Carleton & Co.
Publication Date:
Language:
English
Physical Description:
44, [2] p. : ill. ; 15 cm.

Subjects

Subjects / Keywords:
Wit and humor, Juvenile ( lcsh )
Primers (Instructional books) -- 1881 ( rbgenr )
Publishers' advertisements -- 1881 ( rbgenr )
Bldn -- 1881
Genre:
Textbooks ( fast )
Publishers' advertisements ( rbgenr )
non-fiction ( marcgt )
Spatial Coverage:
United States -- New York -- New York
Target Audience:
juvenile ( marctarget )

Notes

General Note:
Publisher's advertisements on endpapers and back cover.
General Note:
Illustrations by Bellew.
Funding:
Preservation and Access for American and British Children's Literature, 1870-1889 (NEH PA-50860-00).
Statement of Responsibility:
by Frank Bellew.

Record Information

Source Institution:
University of Florida
Holding Location:
Baldwin Library of Historical Children's Literature in the Department of Special Collections and Area Studies, George A. Smathers Libraries, University of Florida
Rights Management:
This item is presumed to be in the public domain. The University of Florida George A. Smathers Libraries respect the intellectual property rights of others and do not claim any copyright interest in this item. Users of this work have responsibility for determining copyright status prior to reusing, publishing or reproducing this item for purposes other than what is allowed by fair use or other copyright exemptions. Any reuse of this item in excess of fair use or other copyright exemptions may require permission of the copyright holder. The Smathers Libraries would like to learn more about this item and invite individuals or organizations to contact The Department of Special and Area Studies Collections (special@uflib.ufl.edu) with any additional information they can provide.
Resource Identifier:
027260978 ( aleph )
ALK2283 ( notis )
07399571 ( oclc )
17020155 ( lccn )

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This item has the following downloads:


Full Text
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NEW YORK:
G.W. CARLETON & CO., PUBLISHERS.







“3 +

FORT RIGHT PP 884

6. GY. CAREEGO & 60, |
NEW YPRK. ;
4



: The Baldwin Library
University
RmB vit
X Florida



To

My PUBLISHER,
G. W. CARLETON:
To you, my esteemed friend,

I dedicate this little book, which, in part, owes its
style and character to your efforts.

We have toiled over its pages hand in hand,
till it has assumed its present complete form.

Whatever in this book is untrue, or uncertain,
or incomplete, belongs to you; whatever is true, or
noble, or helpful is mine.

Your friend,
Frank BE.irw.






we

e,
ea,

beg AGES



A lad with a gun. Can the
lad shoot the gun ?

No, but the gun can shoot
the lad, if he iS not careful.





Hias this boy a new toy hoe?
Yes, this boy has a new toy
hoe. Can the boy use his new
toy hoe? Oh yes, the boy can
use his new. toy hoe.
































A
Lines






4 Ss

oe Se ——

ees < - ae Vw we
~s hoes FPG at _
Bee > aoe

C COVE.

Here is a nice cove. Is there
a boat in the cove? Oh yes,
there is a boat in the cove,
and there is a cove in the

boat.
9























A tree, and a man, and a dog.
The tree gives umbrageous
wrotection to the mans the
man owns the dog, and the
dog guards the man. The dog

is a cao animal.
10







See, the boy has an egg. Can
the boy suck the eggs?

Oh no, the boy can not suck
the egss—it is bad ess. }







FLY,

The fly has a large eye. See
the fly on the wall. Is your
eye as big as that of the fly?
Oh no, but I will try to make
my eye as big as that of the

fly. .
12





Are you a girl? Oh no, I am
a boy. Are you a sood boy?
Yes, I am a good boy. Why
are you 2 sood boy? Cos JI
would get licked if I was a
bad boy.

13





















HANKER.

This man has shot a crow.
Can the man eat the crow?
Oh yes, the man’ can eat the
crow, but he does not hanker

after him. a















IBEX.

See, the bird on the stream.
Is the bird an Ibex? Oh no,
it is a Drake. Is the drake
laying? Oh no, the drake is
not laying, but the Fox is
laying to ome the drake.





























See, the man has a jus of
rum. Do you not think the
man should take his rum
straight home and not take
it straight, here. |







J

BELLEW



Here is a goat and a lass
and a kid. Is the kid the
young of the goat? Oh no,
the kid is the young of Wil.
liam Brown. |







J ass.

Here is a nice lass. She can
jump and run and hop—hop,
hop, :

And if the nice lass does
not look out she will fall up-
on her nose, MORES nose.











-
Car?

-_ goer de

SBELLEWâ„¢



See this fime cow im the read.
Poor old cow. Does the cow
lay fresh eggs? Oh no, but

she gives fresh milk.
19



COHEN 77) IAA ify t)
ty |} |
a Ltt



It is night and there is a cat
and a kit. Do you hear the
eat and the kit? Oh yes, I
hear the cat and the kit.
The cat is the dam of the
kit.—Dam the Bool and the kit!





QC) oFF.

Behold the equestrian! Is he
ona charger 2
Oh no, he is not on a charger

he is off a discharger.
24









PIC.

See, the pig has a long snout.
What does the pig do with
his long snout ?

The pis grunts through his
long snout and pokes it in
the mud.

Lo
toe





QUAIL.

Bow, wow, wow! Here is a
dog anda bird. Is the bird a
quail? No he tis not a quail,
but he makes ee dog quail.





R wn

Here are two men. They
drink rum. Is it right to
drink rum? Oh no, it is
wrong to drink rum. Where
do men go who drink rum?
They go to ee Bar-Room.















@y SWELL.

See the sea! Do you hear the
roar of the sea? Oh yes, I
hear the roar of the sea, and
see the heavy swell on the

shore.
95



























' i We I





















Wwask





This man has two nice boots.
Should the man go to bed in
his two nice boots? Oh no,
the man should not go to bed
in his two nice boots.
























ey
t
Sa



lambs.

play cards?
play

Here are some ewe

Do ewe lambs
Oh no, they de not
cards, but they gambol on

the green.
. 27





YV VeRIy.

Verily, my son, here is a fine
large fish. Do you think he
is a trout? No, I think he
must be a Smelt, for I smelt

him.
‘28













Where are the figs and the
nuts and the plums and the
cakes? Did this boy eat the
figs and the nuts and the
Plums and the cakes? |

Oh yes, the boy did eat the
figs and the nuts and the

Plums and the cakes!
29





XCEL.

Here is a fime boy who
wants to excel im his class.
Does he Know his lessons?
No, he does not, but he is

going over them.
30












S ns QU Rm
SS
a= reg

See the pig and the dos. The
pig cries week’ week! week.
Should the pig ery week!
week? Oh no, he should net
cry week! week, for he is
taken by the poe (year).



























































Is this a Zebra? No, it is the
ornithorhynchus paradoxus.
He is by the stream. Is the
ornithorhynchus paradoxus a
species of duck=billed platy-
pus?. Oh yes, the ornitho-
rhynechus paradoxus is a spe-
cies of duck=billed platypus.
32







Here is Isabella perusing a
volume. She loves to peruse,
while her imbecile compan-=
ions waste their time in
boisterous amusements. She
Will srow up 2 wise woman
if she does not die of cerebro=

Spinal meningitis.
33



































This bad man has been.
partaking of that tortuous
stimulant known as “ crooked
whisky.” Is it not reprehen-.
sible to partake of such potent

alcoholic beverages 2
34



¢



See! John has brought Jane

a nice purp.

How pleasant to look over
the femce and see John and

Jane play with the purp!
35



























Behold the wise statesman!
He rejoiceth that he stole
the public funds, for he hath
ease and oriental luxury.
Would you remain in squalid
honesty when by stealing you

may become ce and joyful ?







This boy has fallen into a
pit in a vacant lot. Is it not
a pitiful lot?

Poor boy! Would you tell
his Ma?

No, I would not be a peach-

pit. ; ;
r 37



Mental Thistles.



Why does an Ass
Prefer thistles to grass ?
Is a puzzle to many no doubt;

But the answer comes swift, as a flash from the
skies,

And if it’s not witty it is not unwise :—

The brute turns away with contempt from the
grass,

because he’s an



For the plain simple reason
ass.

Why does not the fool prefer virtue to vice?

When one is so vile the other so nice.

The answer we find, by the very same rule.

The fool prefers vice, just because he’s a fool. .
38

s





Here is an ass.
Can an ass fly?
Oh no, an ass can not

fly, but 2 good many have

tried—in a balloon.
39



A Place for Everything and Every-
thing in its Place.



“Order is heaven’s first law,”—this being
the case, the boy in the opposite picture is
perfectly justified in kicking the pig out
of the house. Perhaps he is kicking him a
little higher than is absolutely necessary,
but still ’tis better to kick a pig high,
than to break the first law of heaven. What
a pity is it that all such animals cannot be
kicked out of their wrong places into their
right places! for, of course every created thing
has a right place, somewhere. A. great states-
man once said, “dirt is only matter in thewrong
place.” Alas! what a pity there are not always
‘nice boys like the one in our cartoon with big
feet and the rectus femoris well developed, to

eject people from their wrong places!

40





E> BrLLiw a



That is right. Kick the pig
out of the house.

The pig should be in the sty
or in the mud.

He must not live in the

house.
Al



Rural Scene. —



See, there is an Agriculturist. He reclines
against the ligneous handle of one of nature’s
sun-shades. There is bucolic youth seated on a
prostrate column, he has a hoe, it is a nice hoe.
There is an equestrian animal and a bovine
animal. There is a swine, and a canine and a
feline. The -anine is a good canine; he says
bow—wow-—wow, but he will not hurt the
feline. The feline catches rats and mice and
birds and hooks the butter off the breakfast-
table. There isa hen and a duck and a bird
on the fence. The hen lays eggs and incubates.
The duck is a vara avis on the tables of the poor
but Adolphus shall have some for dinner one
day. Itis not wrong for a bird to be on the
fence. There isa church; Adolphus should go
to church every Sunday for there he will acquire
ecclesiastical, ethical and religious knowledge
which will make Adolphus a good and wise boy.
We have forgotten the goat.. There is a goat.
The goat is a ruminant animal which eats
brown paper and says “ Ba-a-a-h!”

42





Cee Ei Ly
Bee Zip
AES 5%























Why is this singular old
man standing here? He has
some currency in his hand.
He borrowed it from that
other old man-—but he did
not ask his permission. He
belongs to that religious sect
called PMU ORIN IAs













AND NEW EDITIONS,

RECENTLY ISSUED BY

G. W. CARLETON & Co., Publishers,
Madison Square, New York.

O.
The Publishers, on receipt of price, send any book on this Catalogue by mail; festage /ree.




















°
All handsomely bound in cloth, with gilt backs suitable for libraries.

Mary J. Holmes’ Works.





Storer pap ahaa $1 50 | Darkness and Daylight.,.......¢1 50

. £50 | Hugh Worthingtom...... 1 50

Roeees I 50 Cameron Pride...... I 50

"Lena Rivers ........c.e0eee- 1 50 | Rose Mather....... r 50

Meadow Brook 1 50 | Ethelyn’s Mistake 1 50

Dora Deane..... ea 8 50° |) Millbank... 3.62505 1 50

Cousin Maude .. 10 | Edna Browning. 1 50

Marian Grey. 1 50 | West Lawn.... 1 50
Edith Lyle .. 1 go | Mildred...... 1
Daisy Thornt 1 50 | Forrest House....(New) I

Chateau D’Or....(New eae tnrtr 50 |
* Marion Harland’s Works.

BNONG «cts eas cies 52 ois sis wielepels sles $i coy | Sunny ban kein shi cmq ccs aaae casas $
Hidden Path. . .. 1 50 | Husbands and Homes..



















I

I

Moss Side. 150 | Ruby’s Husband........ rir
Nemesis . .. 150 | Phemie’s Temptation. x
Miriam... . 150 | The Empty Heart .. I

At Last........ r £0) | Jessamine od. vets sires 1

Helen Gardner.... .... .. . 150 | From My Youth Up I

, True as Steel....(New) .........% 150 | My Little Love I









Charles Dickens—15 Wols.—‘ Carleton’s Edition.”

= Pickwick and Catalogue... .....$1 so | David Copperfield............... $x
Dombey and Son ws sees. 150 | Nicholas Nickleby. Saye

Bleak House........ Sra ; Tso: Psittle Dorrit. 2.25 I

Martin Chuzzlewit zx 50 | Our Mutual Friend.. ©
Barnaby Rudge—Edwin Drood. 1 50 | Curiosity Shop— “Miscellaneous. 1

> Child’s England—Miscellaneous 1 50 | Sketches by Boz—Hard Times.. 1
Christmas Books—Two Cities....1 50 | Great Eepectationgesltaly eat i










































G. W. CARLETON & >= C 0. *S PUBLICATIONS.
“May Agnes Fleming’ s Novels.


















Guy Eariscourt’s Wife.......... $x 50 | A Wonderful Woman...........$1
A Terrible Secret..... 1 AGO: A. Mad Marriage........ oa 3
Norine’s Revenge. - 150 One Night’s Mystery I
Silent and Truc... 1 50 Kate Danton.......... i
Heir of Charlton. I-50 Carried by Storm........ x
Lost fora Womer 150 | A Wife’s Fimendy: won GNCWP is... I

ee ne Game of Wh
Pole on Whist—The Enzlish standard work. « With Hie t Portland Rules.” .

Miriam Coles Harris.







MARS OCS! triste titans side aw slesaicsain’e $z.50°|. The'Sutherlands... ....2.1.....

Frank ‘Warrington a Rsad 150. RASC EAD Stes ceeccdac seca Fes

Louie’s Last Terri, St. ‘Mary's I 50 Round east for Children..

A Perfect Adonis. ..... ae es Richard Vandermarck .

Missy—New 50 Happy-Go-Lucky... “(New) a taverns
Mirs. nar s Cook Book.

Mrs. A. P. Heil’s New Southern Cookery Book, and domestic receipts...... $e
Julie P. Smith's Novels.

Widow Goldsmith’s Daughters< $1 boo [oDhe: Widower... c.i0ccesseccen:

\whris and Otho . . 1 50 The Married Belle...... i



Aen. id Maids.

‘ + = 50 Courting and Farming..
Big-foung Wife i



































es Miserables—Translated from the French, The only complete edition...... $1 50 |
Captaia Mayne Reid. |
Tie Scalp Hunters ape go uf! “Dhe- White: Chef, s...csc.ccs.5 + $x 50
The Rifle Rangers.. I 50 The Tiger Hunter:... wos SS
The War Trail. .... + 150 | The Hunter’s Feast.. x 50 |{
The Wood Rangers. - 150 | Wild Teihe pee icae «st E 5e }/
The Wild Huntress. x 50 | Osceola, the Seminole........... r 50 |}
oe’s Select Stories. i
True Yo. the asta: 2... cents $1 50 | A Long Look Ahead......
The Star and the Cloud . I 50 | I’ve Been Thinking.........
How Coula Ye Help it 2......... 1 50 To Love and to be Loved..
Charles Dickens. J
Child’s History of, Iingland—Ca s New. ‘' School Zdition,”’ Wlustrated..%1 oo
: Hand-Books of Society.
The Habits of Goad Society—The nice points.of taste and good manners...... $1 00
Tk Art of Convers those who wish, to be agreeable talkers . Ico
The Arts of Writing, Reading and Speakirg—TYor Self-Improvement I 00
New Diamond Edi zantly bound, 3 volumes in a box.. 3.00
Car. ’s Popular Quotations.
Carleton’s New Hand k-+Familiar Quotations, with their Authorship, ....$1 50
Famous Books—Carieton’s Edition.
Arabian Nights—illustrations....$1 00 | Don Quixote—Dore Illustrations..$z 00
Robinson Crusoe—Griset. do... 100 | Swiss Family Robinson. do... 1 00
ash Eillings
His Complete Writings—With Biogiaphy, Steel Portrait, and roo Illustrations. $2 50
Old Probability—Ven Comic eo x, 1870 to 1879. Bound in one volume..... I 50
&lism Pinkerton.
Model Town and Detectives....8: 50 | Spiritualists and Detectives.... 4 $x 50 |
Strikers, Corimunists, etc tage 140 | Mollie Maguires and. Detectives 1 50
Criminal Reniinisc . 1 so |* Mississippi Outlaws, etc........ 1 50
Gypsies and Detecti i: Bucholz and Detectives. Lent e6a)



5°
5°
5°
5°
5°
5°

75

0°


















Rural Scene.

See, there is an Agriculturist. He reclines
against the ligneous handle of one of nature's
sun-shades. There is bucolic youth seated on a
prostrate column, he has a hoe, it is a nice hoe.
There is an equestrian animal and a bovine
animal. There is a swine, and a canine and a
feline. Tbh -anine is a good canine; he says
bow-wow--wow, but he will not hurt the
feline. The feline catches rats and mice and
birds and hooks the butter off the breakfast-
table. There is a hen and a duck and a bird
on the fence. The hen lays eggs and incubates.
The duck is a rara avis on the tables of the poor
but Adolphus shall have some for dinner one
day. It is not wrong for a bird to be on the
fence. There is a church; Adolphus should go
to church every Sunday for there he will acquire
ecclesiastical, ethical and religious knowledge
which will make Adolphus a good and wise boy.
We have forgotten the goat. There is a goat.
The goat is a ruminant animal which eats
brown paper and says Ba-a-a-h !"
42





















That is right. Kick the pig
out of the house.
The pig should be in the sty
or in the mud.

He must not live in the
house.
41






Mental Thistles.


"Why does an Ass

Prefer thistles to grass ?

Is a puzzle to many no doubt;

But the answer comes swift, as a flash from the
skies,

And if it's not witty it is not unwise:-

The brute turns away with contempt from the
grass,

For the plain simple reason---because he's an
ass.



Why does not the fool prefer virtue to vice ?

When one is so vile the other so nice.

The answer we find, by the very same rule.

The fool prefers vice, just because he's a fool..
38















"1l=m f_

......, ,/,^.. ; ,



This bad man has been
partaking of that tortuous
stimulant known as "crooked
whisky." Is it not reprehen-
sible to partake of such potent
alcoholic beverages ?
34





A Place for Everything and Every-
thing in its Place.

"Order is heaven's first law,"-this being
the case, the boy in the opposite picture is
perfectly justified in kicking the pig out
of the house. Perhaps he is kicking him a
little higher than is absolutely necessary,
but still 'tis better to kick a pig high,
than to break the first law of heaven. What
a pity is it that all such animals cannot be
kicked out of their wrong places into their
right places for, of course every created thing
has a right place, somewhere. A great states.
man once said," dirt is only matter in thewrong
place." Alas! what a pity there are not always
nice boys like the one in our cartoon with big
feet and the rectus femoris well developed, to
eject people from their wrong places I
40







1881. 1881.








.NEW BOOKS

AND NEW EDITIONS,
RECENTLY ISSUED BY

G. W. CARLETON & CO., Publishers,
Madison Square, New York. ,

The Publishers, on receipt of price, send any book on this Catalogue by mail, ostage free.
--.o--
All handsomely bound in cloth, with gilt backs suitable for libraries.
Mary J. Holmes' Works.
pest and Sunshine .......... 50 Darkness and Daylight .........
Onglsh rphans .............. 50 Hugh Worthington.............
Homestead on the Hillside...... 50 Cameron Pride................
'Lena Rivers .................... i 50 Rose Mather ....................
Meadow Brook................... 50 Ethelyn's Mistake ................
Dora Deane..................... i 50 Millbank.......................
Cousin Maude.... .............. o Edna Browning ................
Marian Grey..................... 1 50 West Lawn.............. ..
Edith Lyle ....................... 50 M ildred .......................
Daisy Thornton ............... .. 50 Forrest House....(New) ......... I
Chateau D'Or.... (New) ......... r 50
Marion Harland's Works.
Alone........................... 50 Sunnybank .................... 50
Hidden Path.................... I 50 Husbands and Homes......... 50
Moss Side ........................ 50 Ruby's Husband ................ 1 50
Nemesis ......................... 50 Phemie's Temptation ........... 50
Miriam.......................... I 50 The Empty Heart ............... 50
At Last ......................... i 50 Jessamine........................ 1 50
Helen Gardner................ 50 From My Youth Up ............ 5o
True as Steel....(New) .......... 50 My Little Love................. 50
Charles Dickens-15 'ols.-" Carleton's Edition."
Pickwick and Catalogue.......$ 50 [ David Copperfield...............$ 50o
Dombey and Son ............... 5o Nicholas Nickleby............... o 5o
Bleak House.................... 50 Little Dorrit. .................... 50
Martin Chuzzlewit .............. 50 Our Mutual Friend.............. 5 50
Barnaby Rudge-Edwin Drood. x 50 Curiosity Shop-Miscellaneous. 50
Child's England-Miscellaneous 1 50 Sketches by Boz-Hard Times.. 50o
Christmas Books-Two Cities... I 50 Great Expectations-Italy ....... x 50


i -



















X XCEL.

Here is a fine boy who
wants to excel in his class.
Does he know his lessons?
No, he does not, but he is
going over them.
30



















Here is Isabella perusing a
volume. She loves to peruse,
while her imbecile compan-
ions waste their time in
boisterous amusements. She
will grow up a wise woman
if she does not die of cerebro-
spinal meningitis.
33







S2 G. W. CARLETON & CO.'S PUBLICATIONS.
May Agnes Fleming's Novels.
Guy Eariscourt's Wife......... 50 A Wonderful Woman........... 50
A Terrible Secret............... 1 50 AMad Marriage................. i 50
Norine's Revenge................ 50 One Night's Mystery.......... i 50
Silent and True.................. 5 o Kate Danton..................... I 50
Heir of Chat ton ................. 5o Carried by Storm........ ...... 50
Lort fora Woman-New... .... i 50 A Wife's Tfigedy.....(New)..... i o5
""he Game of Whist.
Polz on Whist-The English standard work.. With the "Portland Rules."... 75
Miriam Coles Harris.
Rutledge ........... ...........x 50o The Sutherlands ................ 5o
Frank Warrington .. ......... i 50 St. Philips...................... 50
Louie's Last Tern, St. Mary's.. 50o Round Hearts for Children...... I 50
A Perfect Adonis ................ 50 Richard Vandermarck.. ...... 50
Missy-New................... 50 Happy-Go-Lucky....(New)..... i 50
Mrs. Hill's Cook Book.
Mrs. A. P. Hil's New Southern Cookery Book, and domestic receipts......$2 oo
Julie P. Smith's Novels.
"Widcw Goldsmith's Daughter, $1 50 The Widower ................$. 50
\Chris and Otho ...... ......... i 50 The Married Belle... ....... i 50
'en Old Maids .................. 50 Courting and Farming.......... 1 50
S-'irfoung Wife................ % 50 Kiss and be Friends........:..... i 50
;lFcy-New..................... r 50
Victor Hugo.
Les Miserables-Translated from the French. The only complete edition... ..$1 50
Captain Mayne Reid.
Tie Scalp Hunters ...........$t 50 The White Chief...............$ 50
The Rifle Rangers .... ...... i 50 The Tiger Hunter................ i ,_
The War Trail. ................. 1 50 The Hunter's Feast............. i 50
The Wood Rangers.............. i 50 Wild Life.......... ........... 5o
"The Wild Huntress............. o50 Osceola, the Seminole........... 50
A. S. Roe's Select Stories.
True to tne Last................$ 50 .A Long Look Ahead...... .....r 5o
The Star and the Cloud ...... I 50 I've Been Thinking ........... 50
How Cqptdo He Help it ?......... 1 50 To Love and to be Loved........ 1 50
Charles Dickens.
Chid's F ist ;y of England-tC:rleton's New "School Edition," Illustrated.. $i oo
Hand-Books of Society.
The Habits of G- jd Socie.y-The nice points of taste and good manners...... oo
"-Th Art of Conversatit'.--for those who wish to be agreeable talkers .. ....... oo
The Arts cf Writing, Reading and Speakirg-For Self-Improvement ........ oo
New Diamond Edition-Eiieantly bound. 3 volumes in a box ................ 3 oo
Carleton's Popular Quotations.
Carleton's New Hand-: ck--Fami:iar Quotations. with their Authorship.....$1 50
Famous Books-Carleton's Edition.
Arabian Nights-Illustrations.... i oo ] Don Quixote-Dore Illustrations.. $ oo
Robinson Crusoe-Griset. do... oo Swiss Family Robinson. do... i oo
Josh Billings
His Complete Writings-With Biographv, Steel Portrait, and 0oo Illustrations.$2 0o
Old Probability-Ten Comic Almin x, 870o to 1879. Bound in one volume..... i 50
AUllrr Pink-rton.
Model Town and Detectives.....i 50 Spiritualists and Detectives.... $x 50
Strikers, Communists, etc ...... Mollie Maguires and Detectives 1 50
Criminal Reminiscenees, etc.... I ;o Mississippi Outlaws, etc........ i 50
Gypsies and Detectives... .... I o -ucholz and Detectives......... i 50


. -- --



















ZEBRA.

Is this a Zebra? No, it is the
ornithorhynchus paradoxus.
He is by the stream. Is the
ornithorhynchus paradoxus a
species of duck-billed platy-
pus ? Oh yes, the ornitho-
rhynchus paradoxus is a spe-
cies of duck-billed platypus.
32





















See John has brought Jane
a nice purp.

How pleasant to look over
the fence and see John and

Jane play with the purp!
35




















This boy has fallen into a
pit in a vacant lot. Is it not
a pitiful lot?
Poor boy! Would you tell
his Ma?
No, I would not be a peach-
pit.
r "37




















Why is this singular old
man standing here? He has
some currency in his hand.
He borrowed it from that
other old man-but he did
not ask his permission. He
belongs to that religious sect
called kleptomaniacs.
44





















Here is an ass.

Can an ass fly ?

Oh no, an ass can not
fly, but a good many have
tried-in a balloon.
39


















"NV WHERE.
Where are the figs and the
nuts and the plums and the
cakes ? Did this boy eat the
figs and the nuts and the
plums and the cakes?
Oh yes, the boy did eat the
figs and the nuts and the
plums and the cakes!
29
















-lpLL W


"y YEAR.

See the pig and the dog. The
pig cries week week! week.
Should the pig cry week:
week? Oh no, he shtil:l not
cry week! week, for he is
taken by the ear (year).
31




















Behold the wise statesman!
He rejoiceth that he stole
the public funds, for he hath
ease and oriental luxury.
Would you remain in squalid
honesty when by stealing you
may become rich and joyful '
36




























,,r
















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4, -




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Full Text


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NEW YORK:
G.W. CARLETON & CO., PUBLISHERS.




“3 +

FORT RIGHT PP 884

6. GY. CAREEGO & 60, |
NEW YPRK. ;
4



: The Baldwin Library
University
RmB vit
X Florida
To

My PUBLISHER,
G. W. CARLETON:
To you, my esteemed friend,

I dedicate this little book, which, in part, owes its
style and character to your efforts.

We have toiled over its pages hand in hand,
till it has assumed its present complete form.

Whatever in this book is untrue, or uncertain,
or incomplete, belongs to you; whatever is true, or
noble, or helpful is mine.

Your friend,
Frank BE.irw.
we

e,
ea,

beg AGES



A lad with a gun. Can the
lad shoot the gun ?

No, but the gun can shoot
the lad, if he iS not careful.


Hias this boy a new toy hoe?
Yes, this boy has a new toy
hoe. Can the boy use his new
toy hoe? Oh yes, the boy can
use his new. toy hoe.





























A
Lines






4 Ss

oe Se ——

ees < - ae Vw we
~s hoes FPG at _
Bee > aoe

C COVE.

Here is a nice cove. Is there
a boat in the cove? Oh yes,
there is a boat in the cove,
and there is a cove in the

boat.
9




















A tree, and a man, and a dog.
The tree gives umbrageous
wrotection to the mans the
man owns the dog, and the
dog guards the man. The dog

is a cao animal.
10




See, the boy has an egg. Can
the boy suck the eggs?

Oh no, the boy can not suck
the egss—it is bad ess. }




FLY,

The fly has a large eye. See
the fly on the wall. Is your
eye as big as that of the fly?
Oh no, but I will try to make
my eye as big as that of the

fly. .
12


Are you a girl? Oh no, I am
a boy. Are you a sood boy?
Yes, I am a good boy. Why
are you 2 sood boy? Cos JI
would get licked if I was a
bad boy.

13


















HANKER.

This man has shot a crow.
Can the man eat the crow?
Oh yes, the man’ can eat the
crow, but he does not hanker

after him. a












IBEX.

See, the bird on the stream.
Is the bird an Ibex? Oh no,
it is a Drake. Is the drake
laying? Oh no, the drake is
not laying, but the Fox is
laying to ome the drake.


























See, the man has a jus of
rum. Do you not think the
man should take his rum
straight home and not take
it straight, here. |




J

BELLEW



Here is a goat and a lass
and a kid. Is the kid the
young of the goat? Oh no,
the kid is the young of Wil.
liam Brown. |




J ass.

Here is a nice lass. She can
jump and run and hop—hop,
hop, :

And if the nice lass does
not look out she will fall up-
on her nose, MORES nose.








-
Car?

-_ goer de

SBELLEWâ„¢



See this fime cow im the read.
Poor old cow. Does the cow
lay fresh eggs? Oh no, but

she gives fresh milk.
19
COHEN 77) IAA ify t)
ty |} |
a Ltt



It is night and there is a cat
and a kit. Do you hear the
eat and the kit? Oh yes, I
hear the cat and the kit.
The cat is the dam of the
kit.—Dam the Bool and the kit!


QC) oFF.

Behold the equestrian! Is he
ona charger 2
Oh no, he is not on a charger

he is off a discharger.
24






PIC.

See, the pig has a long snout.
What does the pig do with
his long snout ?

The pis grunts through his
long snout and pokes it in
the mud.

Lo
toe


QUAIL.

Bow, wow, wow! Here is a
dog anda bird. Is the bird a
quail? No he tis not a quail,
but he makes ee dog quail.


R wn

Here are two men. They
drink rum. Is it right to
drink rum? Oh no, it is
wrong to drink rum. Where
do men go who drink rum?
They go to ee Bar-Room.












@y SWELL.

See the sea! Do you hear the
roar of the sea? Oh yes, I
hear the roar of the sea, and
see the heavy swell on the

shore.
95
























' i We I





















Wwask





This man has two nice boots.
Should the man go to bed in
his two nice boots? Oh no,
the man should not go to bed
in his two nice boots.





















ey
t
Sa



lambs.

play cards?
play

Here are some ewe

Do ewe lambs
Oh no, they de not
cards, but they gambol on

the green.
. 27


YV VeRIy.

Verily, my son, here is a fine
large fish. Do you think he
is a trout? No, I think he
must be a Smelt, for I smelt

him.
‘28










Where are the figs and the
nuts and the plums and the
cakes? Did this boy eat the
figs and the nuts and the
Plums and the cakes? |

Oh yes, the boy did eat the
figs and the nuts and the

Plums and the cakes!
29


XCEL.

Here is a fime boy who
wants to excel im his class.
Does he Know his lessons?
No, he does not, but he is

going over them.
30









S ns QU Rm
SS
a= reg

See the pig and the dos. The
pig cries week’ week! week.
Should the pig ery week!
week? Oh no, he should net
cry week! week, for he is
taken by the poe (year).
























































Is this a Zebra? No, it is the
ornithorhynchus paradoxus.
He is by the stream. Is the
ornithorhynchus paradoxus a
species of duck=billed platy-
pus?. Oh yes, the ornitho-
rhynechus paradoxus is a spe-
cies of duck=billed platypus.
32




Here is Isabella perusing a
volume. She loves to peruse,
while her imbecile compan-=
ions waste their time in
boisterous amusements. She
Will srow up 2 wise woman
if she does not die of cerebro=

Spinal meningitis.
33
































This bad man has been.
partaking of that tortuous
stimulant known as “ crooked
whisky.” Is it not reprehen-.
sible to partake of such potent

alcoholic beverages 2
34
¢



See! John has brought Jane

a nice purp.

How pleasant to look over
the femce and see John and

Jane play with the purp!
35
























Behold the wise statesman!
He rejoiceth that he stole
the public funds, for he hath
ease and oriental luxury.
Would you remain in squalid
honesty when by stealing you

may become ce and joyful ?




This boy has fallen into a
pit in a vacant lot. Is it not
a pitiful lot?

Poor boy! Would you tell
his Ma?

No, I would not be a peach-

pit. ; ;
r 37
Mental Thistles.



Why does an Ass
Prefer thistles to grass ?
Is a puzzle to many no doubt;

But the answer comes swift, as a flash from the
skies,

And if it’s not witty it is not unwise :—

The brute turns away with contempt from the
grass,

because he’s an



For the plain simple reason
ass.

Why does not the fool prefer virtue to vice?

When one is so vile the other so nice.

The answer we find, by the very same rule.

The fool prefers vice, just because he’s a fool. .
38

s


Here is an ass.
Can an ass fly?
Oh no, an ass can not

fly, but 2 good many have

tried—in a balloon.
39
A Place for Everything and Every-
thing in its Place.



“Order is heaven’s first law,”—this being
the case, the boy in the opposite picture is
perfectly justified in kicking the pig out
of the house. Perhaps he is kicking him a
little higher than is absolutely necessary,
but still ’tis better to kick a pig high,
than to break the first law of heaven. What
a pity is it that all such animals cannot be
kicked out of their wrong places into their
right places! for, of course every created thing
has a right place, somewhere. A. great states-
man once said, “dirt is only matter in thewrong
place.” Alas! what a pity there are not always
‘nice boys like the one in our cartoon with big
feet and the rectus femoris well developed, to

eject people from their wrong places!

40


E> BrLLiw a



That is right. Kick the pig
out of the house.

The pig should be in the sty
or in the mud.

He must not live in the

house.
Al
Rural Scene. —



See, there is an Agriculturist. He reclines
against the ligneous handle of one of nature’s
sun-shades. There is bucolic youth seated on a
prostrate column, he has a hoe, it is a nice hoe.
There is an equestrian animal and a bovine
animal. There is a swine, and a canine and a
feline. The -anine is a good canine; he says
bow—wow-—wow, but he will not hurt the
feline. The feline catches rats and mice and
birds and hooks the butter off the breakfast-
table. There isa hen and a duck and a bird
on the fence. The hen lays eggs and incubates.
The duck is a vara avis on the tables of the poor
but Adolphus shall have some for dinner one
day. Itis not wrong for a bird to be on the
fence. There isa church; Adolphus should go
to church every Sunday for there he will acquire
ecclesiastical, ethical and religious knowledge
which will make Adolphus a good and wise boy.
We have forgotten the goat.. There is a goat.
The goat is a ruminant animal which eats
brown paper and says “ Ba-a-a-h!”

42


Cee Ei Ly
Bee Zip
AES 5%




















Why is this singular old
man standing here? He has
some currency in his hand.
He borrowed it from that
other old man-—but he did
not ask his permission. He
belongs to that religious sect
called PMU ORIN IAs










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