Zonian

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Zonian
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English
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St. Petersburg Printing Co.
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St. Petersburg, FL
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Yearbook
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University of Florida
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University of Florida
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THE


VOL XI.


ZONIAN


BALBOA, CANAL ZONE, i92O No. i


PUBLISHED BY THE BALBOA HIGH SCHOOL.



Zouian ftaff.


Business Manager .
7oke Editor
Athletic Editor (Boys')
Athletic Editor (Girls')


Editor-in-Chief .
WARREN JORDAN
ROBERT GETMAN
DAVID NEVILLE
FRANCES WESTBERG


SWILLIS R. PRESSELL
Circulation Editor
Ahumni Editor
Society Editor
Exchange Editor


FRANCES THORNTON
RUTH WILSON
SUSIE ALLEN
MARIA HUNSECKER


CONTENTS.


Zonian Staff..... .. ..
Editorial....... .... WILLIS R. PRESSELL
Graduates ....
I iC u l .. .. . . . . . . . . . . . .
Ain't It the Truth?..... .MARIE MACMAHON
Why We Stay...... CECILIA TWOMEY
ForA'That.... ......... DAVIDNEVILLE
Balboa ... .
Revelation ... . . ..... RUTH WILSON
One Girl's Way ........... CARLA SMITH
Un Dia en el Canal... .. .... RUTH WILSON
Balboa Dry Dock and Shops .. GEORGE DANSKIN
When A Feller Needs A Quarter,
GERTRUDE VAN HARDEVELD
El Matrimonio Desgraciado ... MARIA HUNSECKER
Les Iles de Perles .......... FRANCES WESTBERKG


Pink Handkerchiefs ...... ANITA SARGENT
Tommy's Story .. .. .. CECILE LEAR
The Poisoned Pie .HERBERT MCCLAIN
6 idl ,r.l Cut..
Class Prophecy ..
Green Stockings
Colon .
Society .. .. SUSIE ALLEN
Athletics .... DAVID NEVILLE
Girls' Athletics .. FRANCES WESTBERG
Exchanges .. MARIA HUNSECKER.
Exchange Humor..
A BrightSunny Day in Panama, ALBERT S. BROWNING
Alumni......... RUTH WILSON
C lass W ill .. ............ .
Jokes .. ROBERT A. GETMAN


-------


~$~W I





THE ZONIAN.


EDITORIAL



epV/21


EDUCATION.


Did you ever connect speculation with educa-
tion? Probably not. Nearly everyone at some-
time or other has had a desire to speculate. We
believe, however, that there is no speculation
when a person invests heavily in an education, for
it is a "sure thing." People of high-school age
do not look at the acquirement of an education
in the light of an investment. But it is, just as
much as though one had bought cotton, oil, or
gold stock.
The average person's career is decided by the
way he invests between the ages of fourteen to
eighteen. The one who stops school at the end
of the eighth grade and takes a position where
the immediate dividends are greater, chooses a
venture where the dividends will not cvar to any
great extent for the rest of his life; but he, who
invests heavily in the knowledge market and takes
all that is offered, will find that in a short time
the proceeds of this investment, will far surpass
those realized by the one who passed up education
for the investment which showed immediate re-
turns.
True, some will say that the greatest men in
our history and some of the big business men of
to-day had nothing more than a country school
education. But, we :ak you, how many of these
men who did not have the opportunity to carry
their education further than the country school
let it u, at that? You will find that all of them
who did not actually) go to school past the eighth
grade made some private speculation in "Preferred


Knowledge" on their o\ n hook and thereby won
out. Our own Abraham Lincoln is as good an
example of this as we have. Due to necessity.
his schooling was sadly neglected. He was no
richer than the most humble person who reads
these lines, but he saw that "Gray Matter Stock"
is always a good deal above par. He had no one
'to offer him the opportunities which the poorest
now possesses. As the educational market ,was
rather low in Kentucky, he played the Bear and
made a good investment in "General Knowledge."
Everyone knows the result.
Some will say that the big men who had a
meager start were lucky, or were gifted with
genius. Edison says, "Genius is 2 per cent
genius and 98 per cent hard work." And some
anonymous author says:
"The men the world calls luck%, aill r oll ou. ever one,
That succet, cnmes not by u ihine, bur h\v hard work, bravely
mine.

The men who stopped school at an early age and
studied later bK themselves and amounted to
something, did not take that method from choice,
but because the financial condition of their families
was such that it was necessary. So, fellow stu-
dents of t'--dJay., why forego the excellent oIppor-
tunities offered bh the schools unless it is a
financial necessity?
The large majority of the students who stop
school at the end of the grades, do not do it
because of necessity, but because the immediate






THE ZONIAN.


returns of a position look big to them. A big
building is no good without a solid foundation;
neither is a big business possible without a solid
foundation. The sane education and sound prin-
ciples of the various members of that business
are what make it solid.
There is now a large and wonderful field open
for right-thinking men and women. Now is
the time to get a generous education. L-)ok at
the condition of the world to-day, war, famine,
desolation, and Bolshevism. A period of recon-


structioniscoming. The country will need reliable,
well-trained people for this reconstruction. If we
are to be the ones to do it, let us get the proper
education that we may do it right.
What course are you going to choose? Are you
going to take the opportunity of serving your
country and yourself by getting a solid founda-
tion for anything you may be called on to do, or
are you going to be one of the "wise guys" who
risks entering on his life's work without the proper
education?
WILLIS R. PRESSELL, '20, Editor.








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THE ZONIAN.


WILLIS PRESSELL


Characteristic

Specialty .. ...

Favorite expression

Ambition .. .


. Wisdom

.l. le r

.... "Ba-a-h!"

To be a chemist


Characteristic ....



Favorite expression

Ambition


. . Fickleness

......The nearest girl

..To get his. Say!"

...To get his diploma


GEORGIA ELLSWORTH


Characteristic.


Quietness


Specialty .. ....... ......... Anything new

Favorite expression . ....... ."Oh, darn it!"

Ambition.... .. To attend business college









FRANCES THORNTON CARLA SMITH


Characteristic .. .

Specialty .... ..

Favorite expression

Ambition .......


Jollity

.. . .. Star gazing

... "For the love of Mike!"

..... To be a Washington belle


Characteristic

Specialty . .

Favorite expression

Ambition . .


.... Wholesomeness

.. Declamations

."It's sort of --!"

. To be a lawyer


JOHN KILLER










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THE ZONIAN.


WILLIAM CHRISTIAN


Characteristic .... .

Specialty ......... .

Favorite expression. ....

Ambition . ..


. ... .... .Chivalry

. ... ..... Athletics

.. .."Listen here!"

.... To be a dentist


Characteristic .. ..

Specialty ........

Favorite expression.

Ambition ......


. ...... M anliness

.....Hunting

. . ..... "Aw-w-w-!"

..To be a scientific farmer


JANE CALVIT


Characteristic ..

Specialty . .

Favorite expression

Ambition ...










MARIA HUNSECKER


S. . . ...... Sweetness

. Typing for Mr. Boss

. . ..."Honestly?"

To be a physical directress










RUTH WILSON


Characteristic .. ..

Specialty .........

Favorite expression.

Ambition .. . .


............... Impertinence

..... .... M ischief

... ...."You po-or nut!"

To marry an Italian tenor


Characteristic .

. *,'.' .. .. .. .

Favorite expression.

Ambition ......


MR 72571-2


LYLE WOMACK


.... Dignity

....Languages

"Oh, dear!"

..... .To travel










































































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THE ZONIAN.


Pnw Ir.R BA Tro


FRAmvnc W\\EsrRER


Characteristic. ....

Specialty .......

Favorite expression

Ambition ..


... . .Self confidence

.... Fixing (?) the bell

..... "Great cats!"

To be a structural engineer


Characteristic



Favorite expression

Ambition


...... horoughness

....Basket ball

. ...... "I'l4e e 1.,rrn '

To be a teacher of languages


MARTHA ZARAK


DAVID NEVILLE


Characteristic

Specialty ...

Favorite expression

Ambition .......


S. Amiability

Formulas in chemist-y

.... Never been heard

To be a bacteriologist


Characteristic

Specialty

Fa:'orite expression

Amb lion


.... Initiative

Procrastination

':Quite so! Quite so!"

STo live in the bush








































































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THE ZONIAN.


Characteristic..

Specialty ....

Favorite expression

Ambition ......


....... .. ..Jerkiness

...... Dodging the question

."I can't go! I've got a date."

....... .To be a school teacher


Characteristic

Specialty .....

Favorite expression

Ambitio ......


....Sociability (?)

.Maidenly reserve

....Unheard

. Business life


ALBERT THAVER


Characteristic .

Specialty ....

Favorite expression.

Ambition.. ..










ROBERT GETMAN


. Maidenliness

... .Studying

"Oh, girls!"

.To go to college










WARREN JORDAN


Characteristic..

.\pe, ii,'ty . . . .

Favorite expression.

Ambition .


.. .. .Efficiency

.......... Censored

S "Haw-w-w!"

.To be a millionaire


Characteristic

* ;,r ...' . . .

Favorite expression,

iAmbition .


..... Egotism

. Running

."Hey! Get to work!"

To attend Annapolis


MABEL LEE


ANNA SIRE


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THE ZONIAN.


Characteristic

.Spe, ..'a t .....

Favorite expression

Ambition .... .


Frivolity

Boys

."It's most horrible!"

... To vet married


Characteristic

Specialty .

1Favorite expression

Ambition


.Volubility

Vamping

"But, Miss Gallup ?"

... To be a lawyer


MuRo GOLDEN


Characteristic.



Favorite expression

Ambition ...


HELEN MILLOY


.... Sarcasmt

Noise and more of it



. .Success and money


StsiEF. ALI.EN


Characteristic. ... .. .. Willingness

Special .........Finding mistakes in bookkeeping

Favorite expression ....... .. ."Oh, lands!"

Ambition ...... To be a kindergarten teacher


Characteristic.

Specialty

Favorite expression

.Ambition. .,.


.Demureness

Society

..."Caramba!"

To be a irivaite secretary


CLARA WOOD


HARRY GRIER






16


Nikarulty.

a------------- ---- -----------i


A. R. LANG, Superintendent.
A. B., Nebraska Wesleyan University.
A. MN., University of Nebraska.



BERNARD L. Boss, Principal.
Graduate work at Oshkosh, Wisconsin State
Normal School.
Ph. B., University of Wisconsin.
Graduate Work, University of Wisconsin.
Scence.


MYRTIS M. GALLUP.
A. B., Michigan State Normal College.
A. M., Columbia University.
English.


OLGA J. FROST.
A. B., Mt. St. Vincent-on-Hudson.
French and Spanish.



ALBERTA R. CRESPI.
A. B., Smith College.
Mathematics.



EDNA HEALY HOWARD.
A. B., University of Minnesota.
Science and Histor\.


ESTELLE R. NMCKELVEY.
A. B., University of Minnesota.
Latin and English.




LEONA NI. ARMSTRONG.
B. S., Drake University.
Spanisjh.


EDNA L. V. BAER.
A. B., University of Wisconsin.
Sheboygan Business College.
Gregg School.
Commercial Subijets.


CHARLOTTE GUGENHAN'.
B. S., Kansas State Agricultural College.
Houehioid 4/rts.




WALLACE LEE.
W\ooster College.
Manual Training.




M. D. NicHOLas.
Northwestern University.
Music.


THE ZONIAN.






THE ZONIAN.


AIN'T IT THE TRUTH?
Marie MiacMIahon, '21.


Mary Elizabeth was straight-haired, freckled
faced and snub-nosed. All these things were re-
flected very plainly in the glass before which she
sat, her chin in her hands and a very preoccupied
expression on her face. She heaved a great sigh
as she thought of life's unfairness. Here she was.
Just look at her. Was it her fault that her hair
wasn't curly? Could she help it because she had
freckles? Had she had .ianthini, to say about
what kind of a nose she was to have? No, decided-
ly not. Life certainly was unfair. Now just look
at Rose May. She wasn't freckled nor snub-nosed
nor straiieht-h.iir.d nor anything. Why did God
give her two lovelydi li1il and long golden curls?
She wasn't quite sure, though, that these last
were a gift of God, but anyway, even if they
weren't natural, they were curls. Well, it was too
much for her. She couldn't understand.
Now this wasn't the first time Mary Elizabeth
had reasoned this out before her mirror, but to-day
she had found something which made her wish
more than ever for the personal charms she didn't
possess.
She had found a note written to Rose May.
It read as follows:
MR 72571-3


"Dere Rose May i luv you, do you
are pretty.


luv me? i think you


Your sweetheart Harry."

Now, of course, Mary Elizabeth knew that Rose
M1.iv sometimes received this kind of note, but
the thing that made her so thoughtful was the
name signed at the bottom. Harry was the little
boy she 'specially admired, although he didn't
know it. Why couldn't Rose M1ay leave him
alone? Why wouldn't she be content with the
others? Of course Nl.iry Elizabeth understood
that it would be impractical to appeal to Rose
May. She must think up some other plan.
Her mind was still unmade when she went to
bed. That night she dreamed of a picnic. The
picnickers were the children of 4-B and they
were spending their half-holiday in the near-by
grove. N.l..-r of the children could be seen very
plainly but in the foreground was Rose May,
hercurls blowing in the breeze, and not very far be-
hind her, was Harry. Just before they went home,
a storm came up, and oh! how it thundered! The
children were wet-here she awoke, her dream un-
finished. She sat up in bed and said in an awed


'.iHX8II






THE ZONIAN.


whisper, "W\hy, that's an omen, I do believe.
What else could it be? Aren't we having a picnic
Friday afternoon in the grove, and didn't I hear
Harry ask Rose May if she'd stay with him?
Huh! just as if he'd want her if he saw her at
night after her mother had put her hair up in
curls. Well, my problem is all worked out, and
all I have to do is to pray for rain."
With this she rolled over and sank once more
in slumber.
In spite of Mary Elizabeth's fervent prayers
the next day dawned bright and clear. At the
breakfast table she anxiously inquired, "Do you
think it will rain, Daddy?"
"No, child, don't worry, nothing will happen
to spoil your day. Take your lunch and run off."
So with a heavy heart Mary Elizabeth set off.
The children were to come in as usual in the
morning and as soon as the noon bell rang, were
to go to the grove where they would eat their
lunch and spend the rest of the afternoon.
Noon. And no rain! What was the matter?
Hadn't God heard her prayers! Well, something
was wrong somewhere, but she couldn't see where.
Anyway it wasn't raining and what's more 't
didn't look the least bit like rain.
Mary Elizabeth was disappointed. Somehow
she hadn't counted on its not raining. She had
counted her chickens before they were hatched and
now her eggs were all broken. "Well," she sighed,
"it wont rain any quicker by my sitting here.
I might just as well make the best of a bad
bargain."
When they reached the grove she played around
with her companions, all the while rebelling at the
thought of having to give up her nice plan just


because of a little rain, or to be accurate, the lack
of a little rain. Here she got up and walked
toward the grove alone, absorbed in thought and
not noticing where she was going. Suddenly she
heard voices, and looking up, saw she had taken
the path to the creek. She stopped and listened,
then when she recognized the voices, her face lit
up and she exclaimed, "Well, if that isn't luck!
Rose IMay and Harry, and at the creek of all
places. Now I know why it hasn't rained. Of
course I couldn't expect that God would do
everything, furnishing the rain and all. Anyway,
God only helps those who help themselves,"-
she had heard that a long time ago. Well, here's
where she'd prove it.
She walked up to them, saying, "Why, hello
there! What are 0ou doing away up here?"
By this time she was right back of Rose May,
when, to appearances, she slipped and to save
herself from falling, she naturally made a des-
perate grab for the nearest object, which just
happened to be Rose May, who then went
headlong into the shallow creek. She came up
gasping for breath and sputtering angrily," Oh,
you mean thing, you! I just know you did that
on purpose. Just look at me now. I'm all wet."
She certainly was a sight to behold-water
dripping from her hair, no longer curly; water drip-
ping from her nose and chin, and water dripping
from her now mud-colored dress. She surely
wasn't an object for admiration, and Harry was
quick to note this fact. He said hurriedly, "Say,
there's Tom whistling for me. Igottago." Then
turning to Mary Elizabeth, asked, "Going back?"
Mary Elizabeth nodded her head happily and
said, "Sure."


WHY WE STAY.
Cecelia Tiony,, '...


Ive been down here in Panama
So "dog-gone" many years,
That when I think of the things
I've missed at home,
It fills my eyes with tears.


But when I think of the freezing cold,
And the price of coal, and the "flu,"
I'm so "dog-gune" glad
I'm in Panama
I don't know what do do.






THE ZONIAN.


FOR A' THAT.
David 1.-..' '20.


He stood on the afterdeck, and watched the
cold pile of spire and tower and buttress fade into
the softening distance, and a great relief flowed
over him. His Waterloo; he, a failure.
He had had a business course in college and
then 3 years in the confusing swirl of the city-
maddening to him who had always been as
naturally a part of the jungle wilds as the ocelot
and the hyena.
"Ingrainedly inaccurate" they called him "care-
less, heedless." "Plain dumb"-his own explana-
tion. But it was hard-Three years-He dreamed
of them, those long lines of figures-figures that
would lie.
But he was leaving it. He was going back-
Home- The word thrilled him. It meant
cool mornings, misty valleys, green, shady streams,
the roar of breakers, and the swish of palms in the
night wind. It meant a fresh opportunity. He
had never been fitted for that other thing.
He would go to his people first. He would
show them that he knew he owed them-much.
He would give them what he had, and then-he
would go and lose himself in the unexplored vast-
ness. He could conquer that, could satisfy his
desires! It was far easier to master the jungle
than those man-made mazes of convention,
criticism, and prejudice. New thoughts flooded
his mind and he straightened, and the memory
and brooding of 3 bitter years fell from him like a
cloak. His mind leaped forward and with softened
face and tender eyes he visualized it-that boy-
hood land of long ago.
Its beautiful glades of velvet green
Inlittlenooks along thestream,
whose variations a jungle lover would spend a life-
time searching out, whose beauty would hush the
poet's voice to its softest quality. He leaned on the
rail, face in arms, and let his emotions sweep over
him like a warm and gentle tropic storm.
It was dry season but still the river hurtled
swiftly downward. It is a beautiful stream,
spreading a swift succession of pool and rapid and


shallow and gravelly stretch and canyon-can-
yons where the river sometimes narrows to 40 feet
with black walls towering a hundred feet above
where the river roars and leaps and tears as though
enraged at such close confinement; and then, as
though tired and penitent of its harsh temper, runs
silent and deep for a stretch beneath the inter-
twining branches of huge trees that grow out of a
veritable garden of fern and lily and palm on the
banks and support orchids and trailing ferns and
myriads of jungle life, who raise, at different times
in the day, their own peculiar paeans of thanks-
giving to the sky.
Truly this is the promised land, and will be
until modern man sets his destructive foot in its
beauty, and under his blighting breath, the trees,
the playgrounds and the homes of the tree folk
will crash to the ground, crushing under them the
parks of other dwellers of the jungle, and the bed-
lam of civilization with all its smoke and grime will
pollute its limpid streams and wreck its peace and
beauty.
And why ? That a hundred million more humans
may live and move and have their being in all their
sweaty, uncomfortable, discontented, nerve-rack-
ing environment, with curses on their lips and
pollution in their hearts as well as on their bodies.

"Where every prospect pleases
And only man is vile."

A boat crept slowly up the river, the 2 men in her
an inspirational and romantic touch to a wildly
beautiful picture. More hardy they seemed than
other men-godlike in their supreme self-re-
liance, and although their pulses and muscles
throbbed under the strain, yet their hearts surged
and exulted at every thrust of the long poles.
For theirs was mastery, that goal toward which
every human heart longs unceasingly.
Their bodies swayed rhythmically and the clink-
clank clink-clank rang with mechanical regularity
as the steel-shod poles gripped the stony bottom.






THE ZONIAN


Up over rapids and low falls, only requiring that
the low prow ride over the slant ahead, and
the back of the rise be flat enough that all the
wight shall not fall on the middle of the cayuco
when the crest is crossed, sinking the low sides
beneath the surface.
Of course there is alhw ays danger from the tur-
bulent might of the torrent and there are always
instantaneous judgment decisions to be made.
Then the two must always sense the move of the
other before it is made, must both insin.tivelv
know the same thing to be the right thing. For
a conflict of w ills gives th e e er-waiting current its
opportunity and you go rushing back dlwn ii without
a chance to straighten out the boat or choose a
course-a snag or a jurting rock broadside the
boat; or a breaking rest, or a sudden drop and your
voyage is over.
The 2 men in the cayuco worked perfectly to-
gether. One brown, short, stocky, Indian-fea-
tured; the other white, tall, slender, except should-
ers and arms; a light down of beard on his face.
The man of the New% York boat: The paleness
and the drawn lines gone from his face, the stoop
from his shoulders, the dejected look from his eyes.
A creamy tan from head to waist, from knee to foot;
swelling muscles rippling up the arms and across
the shoulders; a swelling barrel df a chest that
heaved with the thrust of the palanka; a pleasant
gauntness about the cheeks; a happy light in his
eyes. Hardly recognizable from a year's work
on the river, he rode the stern, purposeful, power-
ful of motion.
"It was late afternoon. The iungle folk were stir-
ring. A rapir hauled his glistening black length
from the water and stood on the bank, undecided
whether to flee or stand, and watched them shoot
swiftly by. A calm stretch, and they ,.traightcned
up and drew in great draughts of the rapidly cool-
ing and delicately perfumed e, ening air, while with
effjrtlcss strokes the- sh.it the boat forward.
A howler monkey roared his throaty challenges
so near that they both started and then laughed
softly to each other. It never failed that effect.
The most startling, fearsome sound of the jungle
comes from that monkey. A pair of monkeys
followed in the trees overhead scolding intermit-
tently. .
The sound of a rapid ahead floated down to
them.. Both scanned the bank closely, as though


searching for something. The Indian pointed and
the white man swung the boat and thrust it high
upon the bank. A turkey whirred heavily from a
near-by bush to a low tree. Without moving from
the boat, the white man dropped it with his carbine.
They ate turkey for dinner, with palm cabbage
and rice, saving enough so that the Indian did
not throw his lines in theriver that night,as was his
custom. And gladly he spared some warery citi-
zens of this kingdom of vibrant life their peace.
For these two had penetrated beneath that shallow,
callous skin of the wild that tempts the community
dweller to slay and destroy without compunction
to its warm, sensitive heart that ages and dries
an I stops w hen its laws are transgressed, but under-
stands and shelters and comforts those within its
folds when it is young and joyous, as it was made
to be.
And they drank their fill of the cool, clear water
that until now no man had seen. Then they laid
themselves on their palm-leaf couch and drew their
blankets about them.

The pe e the ct'lnini '%.t oni them.
jir c:ihrn thA trrop,'c niiht.
And the thoulghr Ir.-pirre b'. the sill,' hu.h
Crept -.'cr lt rni. ni J bhlurre.j their itht

The Indian dropped swiftly to sleep, brown,
contented face to the sky, and slept the dreamless
slep of the innocent. The white man lay and
watched the red in the west fade yellow and be re-
placed by the amethyst blue of immeasurable
depth, watched the flaming yellow of the guayacan
tree on the hill acr,-ss the river fade in the dimming
lihht. Hc listened intently to the roar of the rapid,
the %whirring uf the night birds, the whistle of
the tiny green lizards and the teeming busy life
abhut him. The stars came out, generously strewn,
as is the habit of the tropic sky And again, as he
had done su man. times, he compared his lot with
that if the city dwellers, in their bleak stone cliffs,
and his heart ached with the pity of them and
with the beauty of his own. He closed his eyes.
Hi, breath came deeply, smoothly Last thoughts
slowed over him. He was alseep.
A little white-faced monke', as though grateful
for the companionship, climbed down and curled
himself in a bush a few feet above them. He chat-
tered softly, querulously to himself. Other jungle
denizens came and went noisily or noiselessly,






THE ZONIAN.


in water or on land, each according to his custom.
All were curious about these two strange creatures
in their land but all seemed to recognize instinc-
tively that there was a greater force than their
own, and while some approached, none came near.
Dawn. Rising mists. Opening of vistas. Sweet
cool air. Gleaming, glistening golds of all shades
in the east. Nectarine waters.
He plunged in and dashed vigorously across.
The Indian sat, blanket enfolded, on the bank and
criirni.. at his companion's folly. He climbed the
scar of a recent slide on the far bank and sat on a
jutting rock. Abruptly he scrambled down the
bank and peered intently into the water. He
straightened with a jerk, headup, arms flung wildly
to the skies.
"Gold! Gold! John!" His voice sank to a
whisper. "Gold!"
The Indian jumped to his feet at the wildness
of the cry but sank back at its impart. Happy
man! Ignorant of what a vaunted civilization
will trade him for his gold, able to hold the even
tenor of his way.
Unhappy man. Perhaps to be swerved from
his chosen path, to a life of vain longing by a
visionary bubble.
The work progressed. A sluice box hewn from
a cottonwood. An axe-hewn shovel. Baskets
woven from bejuco o'erflowing with glittering
grains. The cayuco loaded to the water's edge.
The start. A wild arrowy voyage with feet
braced and palanka balanced across the body,
thrusting first on one side, then on the other. On
the swifter runs with hair flying and body
crouched to find a balance. Only one accident,
and that amusing from the startling swiftness of
its action. The Indian, riding the bow when they


were shooting a narrow passage between a huge
boulder and the bank, wedged his palanka be-
tween them and was hurled back breathless,
draped by his middle section over the palanka
like a wet rag on a clothesline. He tumbled
the white man from the boat as he came by, and
the boat, men, and palanka bounced serenely
down the race and grounded together on a sand-
bar at its foot. A fortunate ..rdin., truly.
Three days tuffki.lt to cover the swift water it
had taken 12 to climb, and they found themselves
sailing down the broad lower stretches of the river
with a sail improvised from a blanket. Five days
of this, irksome after the flight on the rapid, and
they reached the first native settlement and
hired a river schooner for the rest of the trip.
A.'.iin he leaned on a steamer rail. He waved
farewell to the Indian, now clad in overalls and a
red cap, patent leathers on his feet and supremely
happy, who faded into the distance, and the sail
of the yawl (his own) became a white speck against
the blue.
This tanned, distinguished-looking white man
turned from the rail and sauntered up the deck.
He paused, looked around to see that no one was
watching, and pulled a shining bit from his pocket.
He held it close before his eyes, clicked his tongue
in his throat and observed solemnly to it!
"The root of all evil! Give us more of the root."
He turned back and gazed long at the hazy blue
of the shore line in the distance. The strains
of the li- a'ii.i waltz caught his ear. He glanced
back as two girlish figures in filmy white danced
into his line of vision. He leaned again on the rail,
head bent, and you might have heard him murmur.
"I wonder? I won--d- !"














































* ..: .


BALBOA.






THE ZONIAN.


Daniel Goodwin, rector of the "Stone Church"
in Albany, New York, was pacing rapidly up and
down his luxuriously furnished study with quick
agitated strides. One glance at his face sufficed
to vouch for the tumultous state of his mind.
"I ou n't go!" he muttered determinedly. "They
can't make me. It's not our war. America's en-
trance-bosh! I'll-I'll claim exemption. No-I
can't-I'll give up my place-my parish. I'll-
I'll-Oh thunder!" he exploded violently, and flung
himself into a great easy chair, while his face
worked convulsively with the stress of strangled
emotion.
How long he sat there he never knew. His
housekeeper's "The Board to see you, sir" startled
him, and, hurriedly throwing on his coat, he
received them doggedly, almost distrustfully.
"Mr. Goodwin" he heard distinctly, but far off.
"We haven't come on a very pleasant errand, to
say the least." The voice drew nearer. "I don't
deem it necessary to waste words. The fact is,"
the voice deafened him now, "we've come to ask
for your resignation." Silence. The great clock
on the stairway boomed five. Silence. Two
minutes dragged slowly by. Finally, rising slowly
to his feet, pausing dazedly, as though to consider
the situation, Goodwin spoke.
"Gentlemen," he said clearly, "I have felt this
coming. However, you know my views on a
certain question uppermost in your minds. I'm
sorry if they displease you. But to preach war
and strife, I can not and will not. Please consider
my resignation effective at once. Good day."
And turning, he strode from the study, etiquette
thrown to the winds.
Goodwin left Alb:any almost immediately, and
was as quickly forgotten He sought seclusion,
but could not find peace. He became restless,
resentful, distrustful, and ever-increasing fire of
hate burned deep in his sol, At last, morose,
melancholy, his doctrine forg, tien, Daniel Good-
win was called to the colors. He went, a disgrace
to his profession, to mankind and to his country.


Three months training at Fort Slocum made him
no better. He openly cursed the land of his birth,
and, when sailing from Camp Merrit for "over
there" he was the "black eye" of the regiment.
*
Boom-Boom-Si-s-s-s-s -Crack! Bang! Heavy
firing on the western front. Somewhere out there
on "No Man's Land" lay Daniel Goodwin, one
of a squad of eight, who, hardly daring to move,
were crawling slowly and painfully through mud,
mire, and grime to cut enemy entanglements.
Bullets whizzed angrily and wrathfully spat the
ground.
"Uh---" shuddered Goodwin, "How slimy
and how ghastly. War indeed!"
Suddenly the sky burst into dazzling brilliancy
as a rocket burst and fell near by. And then all
was quiet.
But for the space of a second only. Louder
and louder boomed the guns; faster and more
angrily spat the bullets; redder and redder flamed
the sky; the ground trembled, shook, and swayed
until in one mighty effort, as tho' all the forces
of the earth were united, a column of soil, rock and
gravel rose into the air to a tremendous height
and fell. And Daniel Goodwin lay still amongst
the debris.
At twilight of the following day, groaning and
writhing in pain, Goodwin regained consciousness.
He rolled painfully over and in so doing lay in a
pool of blood.
He threw out his arms in a gesture of distress
and felt something soft. Raising his head he
beheld a mangled body. He turned frightfully
dizzy and heaved a long, low moan in the agony
of his helplessness. With almost a superhuman
effort he raised himself on his elbow and looking
more closely, discerned the face of a mere youth.
He sank back heavily, and, moaning pitifully,
sighed:
"Must I too be sacrificed in this market of souls?
Oh, there is no God!" and clutching wildly about
as though to find relief, he grasped a tiny bit of


REVELATION.
Ruth E. Wilson, '2o.

S --






THE ZONIAN.


paper. He laboriously raised himself again and
in the dim light of the fading day, falteringly
read the following:
'.A lhdd.e,' ris ior ..,ur :in counirec CG biann, b)y,
:ho' .ou re all I have Do .vjr bit GCd's will b1 d jne
Mot[h.r '
Goodwin lay back and a great white light en-
eloped his soul. His mind clear 1 andL with arms


outstretched, this man prayed; prayed in the star-
light; prayed as never before; prayed for forgive-
ness and salvation.
And so he passed into perfect understanding
with his Maker in the ghastly loneliness of "No
Maln's Lan l."


ONE GIRL'S WAY.
S...'., S 'tl, "'20.


Katherinr Kent,known ask.at by her intimates,
sat swinging in the hammock on the front porch
of the Robinsn h.-ime. She was adorahbly bc-
witching with briow n s all tw inkly with mischief;
little red lips all puckered up, while with her w hite
hands she tried to uck in a few little curlk that
would escape from their proper places. She gave
a quick push with her foot and began swinging
merrily.
"Oh!" and she clasped her hands with delight,
"it will be the best fun, Maggie! Just think-oh!"
And laugh after laugh followed.
"For pity's sake, Katy, what's up?" and Mar-
garet Robinson questioned her friend with interest.
"You've been sitting there for 5 minutes now,
carrying on something dreadful."
"Maggie, I've just remembered what day it is
and I've thought of themost lovelicious scheme,"
and Katherine swung harder than ever.
"Why, to-day's -Thursday. I don't see any-
thing remarkable about that." And Marararet
showed her disgust by turning up her perfectly
good Roman nose.
"Yes, hone bunch, it is-Thursday. It's also
the day after yesterday and the daythefire to-
morrow-but- and here she st dipped swinging
and leaned forward-"it's also, dearest, it's also
the first day of January of the year 19-20; 19
2o," she repeated with eyes twinkling brighter
than ever.
19-20.. Why! that's leap year," and Margaret
gave each word its due.
"I should say it is!"


"But what difference does it make to-- she
paused, questioningly.
"Us? Oh, I suppose it doesn't make any dif'
tu you," and Katherine showed her indifference
to that feature of it, "but-it dots to me."
"It does? For pity's sake, Kate, be merciful,
can't you--
"Listen, Maggie. and in due course the mystery
will be revealed,"with dramatic ardor, "when it's
leap year it's a woman's bounden duty to find out
a few things that she wouldn't dare mention at
other times. Such as how many chances she has
and-er-a-''
"Katherine Kent, you're not thinking of pro-
pos--er-getting mar--!"
"Of proposing? I should say not! But of find-
ing out how many chances of being turned down
I have, if in 4 \ears I should decide to propose to
someone," Katherine gave a knowing wink, "I
should say I have."
"You mean you're going to propose now to
some desirable male so that if in 4 years you
should decide to propose to this same desirable
male you'd know how many chances you'd have,
taking for granted, of course," with sarcastic em-
phasis,"that thedelicate feelings and-er-'lovings'
of this same desirable male wouldn't change in
4 years." And Margaret Robinson gave her head
a toss.
"Margaret Robinson, you're too impossible!"
Katherine laughei'l didn't say anything of the
kind!" She took a deep breath and starred in,
"I'm going to pick out three normal candidates,


$


- ---- -_ E






THE ZONIAN.


sort of-er- well you might say propose to them,
just to see what'll happen. If none of the three
seem at all overcome by my charms, I'll know
then that I'm destined to be a hopeless old maid
and live with a cat and a poll parrot, but-if
even one should be impressed I'll live in-hope,"
and Katherine rolled her eyes with a saintly ex-
pression on her roguish face.
"Well-it might work." But Margaret ap-
peared a trifle dubious, for which let's not judge
her too harshly.
"Might? I tell you, Margaret Robinson, it will
work, and even if everyone refuses to--Oh,
Maggie, it's going to be too much." Jumping up,
Katherine began to waltz Margaret over the porch.
"Just a minute, please," Margaret's voice was
final. "Who are to be the poor unsuspecting
victims?"
"W-e-1-1. I haven't exactly decided." Kath-
erinepaused. "Justaminute." Margaretwatched
her while she ran to her near-by pile of books and
returned with pad and pencil.
"Let's sit in the hammock," and she ran toward
it, dragging Margaret. "Now help me make a list
of all thepossibles." After a few minutes' writing
and conferring, the list was finished.
"Just 6 boys I'd even care to tackle. Now
let's pick out the 3 most normal of them all.
JimmyRichards,-he's toogood-looking. Itreally
isn't normalin thatsex and I might try extrahardto
win him, which would ruin my test." So a pencil
line was run through poor Mr. James Richards.
"Jack Morgan-he's normal, don't you think?"
And Katherine turned questioning eyes toward
her chum.
"Oh, yes, he's normal enough. He certainly
isn't a too good-looking boy!" Kate's eyes had
rather, it would seem, an unnecessary fire. Then,
after a glance at Margaret's shining face, "Oh,
you stop teasing me," and after giving her chum's
arm a playful slap she resumed, "Dwight Green-
ley-too bright and studious-not normal in any
sex. Robert Anderson-I think he's normal."
"Yes, I think he'd be all right." And for once
Margaret agreed.
"Peter Emerton-don't like his name-suppose
he can't help it because I don't happen to like
the name Peter-any way he's better than that
old stupid Roger Johnson. Goodness me, Mag,
suppose Roger was a normal male!" Katherine
was truly aghast at the possibility.
MR 72571-4


"One thing I know, Kate. You wouldn't be
formulating schemes to catch one." Margaret
smiled.
"I should say not!" Then she surveyed her
list. "I think I'll tackle Robert, then Peter Emer-
ton, and then Jack Morgan. I'll start-let's see-
well, as soon as possible." She gazed at the paper
and her wandering glance noted her wrist watch.
"Good night, Maggie, it's 5.45 and we're going to
have company for dinner. I'll have to fly or
mother'll think something's happened to her
angelic little daughter." And, with a backward
wink, she gathered her books and scampered.
A few weeks after, on a Saturday morning,
Margaret Robinson answered a tempestuous
telephone bell. It was Katherine.
"Rush to the aid of one disconsolate! Bring
your racket! Hurry!" Margaret ran for her
racket, anxious to know what had happened.
Ten minutes later the two girls were settled on
one of the garden benches.
"Well, what luck and what news, Katy?" She
was bubbling over with interest.
"It's-Robert Anderson," Kate declared, trying
to look downhearted but not being very success-
ful.
"Robert Anderson? Oh, yes, he was case num-
ber one. Any success?" Breathlessly she waited.
"None. Ab-so-lute-ly none. He's hopeless.
Just think he can't even imagine it," more dis-
consolately than ever.
"Imagine it? Imagine what?" puzzlingly.
"Why, yes," and Katherine began to hum,

"Can you imagine a cozy little cottage;
Can you imagine one built for you and me."

"Heavens! Katherine Kent, you don't mean-
did you sing that song to him and mean it?"
Margaret was horrified.
"Maggie, dear, of course, I didn't mean it."
Katy was hurt. "I just wanted to know his
opinion on the subject." Margaret not interrupt-
ing, she continued. "You know I've been tag-
ging Robert Anderson somewhat shamefully for
the last two weeks."
"I should think I do! When you haven't been
peering out of the window, waiting till he started
to school, you've been throwing paper at him
and making eyes across the classroom. Some-
times, Katherine, I'm almost ashamed of you,"






THE ZONIAN.


there was regret in Marargret's voice. "though
most of the time I've known you've been having
a good time and have tried to convince msclf
that it's all for the best."
"Well, it isn't my fault. I couldn't think of
any other way to bring myself to the notice of
that boy, and I've certainly succeeded. And, oh,
the stale, stale jokes he has tried to pull off, at
which I had to laugh to play the game right.
But it's been quite a bit of fun. Last night, after
I had hinted going to, coming from, and staying
in school, that I love movies, and was just
dying to see Douglas Fairbanks in "Oh, Boy" he
finally got up enough spunk to ask me to go. I
was de-lighted! Now I knew my chance had come.
The time I spent in fixing up for him-the mean
thing! I even wore my new rose dress-the
unappreciative simpleton-! Well, we went and
though I had a stupid time, I survived. When we
reached home, it being early, I asked him in.
I sat down at the piano and sang, and once in a
while he joined in. He has a pretty good voice,
I declare it's a shame-a good voice is such an
asset-then, quite accidentally, of course, I sang

"Can you imagine a co;y little cottage;
Can you imagine one built for you and me."

All the while I was singing I looked at him and
he looked back but he was laughing. Then sort
o' sober-like, he spoke, while I held my breath.
'Say, Kate,' he said, 'that song made me think of
the girl of my dreams.'
'Oh, do describe her to me,' I was just running
over with sweetness. 'Oh, it seems crazy to talk
about her, but then, she's gentle and sweet,' I
chuckled, that was me, of course, 'and pretty,'
plenty of hopes there, 'and domestic', I wasn't
exactly so sure there, 'opposed to suffrage', my
heart sank, 'in fact I've never seen her yet, but
maybe some bright day'-and with great earnest-
ness, he wandered on. Thinking of nothing else
to do I let all the music slam on the piano. That
woke him up and he left soon afterwards. He's
hopeless, and I know now that he can't be normal,
so I content myself. I shall tackle Mr. Peter
Emerton right away. Surely there must be some
boys who have some sense anyway."
"Katy, I'm sorry about Robert Anderson, but
of course he isn't normal. W\'hat are your next
planb"


"Oh, I don't know, but I'm not going to lose
any time over Peter. Just think of all those
precious hours in which I pursued Robert Ander-
son. I feel like--" with which explosion Kather-
ine arose to get her racket to play tennis.
Monday night Margaret received a note via
Katherine's little brother. She opened it anx-
iously.
'Dear M iggeic
I .itt.aked Peter F.merr,.n this afternoon and have decided
never again ru attack jn. one whoue name I don't like. To beur,
with, I 'a.ilked home fropm ,chorol vth him Itake it literally
please,. You ought to have heard the %ondertul excu-e about
going to the drug .tore near 4i. hnuse, I framed up it 'asa
Shopper. The extremilies r.: which one %ill eo to gain a purpose
are reil') dreadful' On the v av I probed him with ques-ions
aboutmarriage. I really had to use a monke.y-rench to extract
them. And what do \ou think He's a regular woman-harer!
Says he wouldn't eien 11;lk home Irom schooll irh one iYou
see he also re.alied the real siru.tioni, and as for surrendering
his life and pcckerbook, %h\ he'd die first! He I'id especial
emphasis on the pocketbook, you m a be sure. Mercenar. old
wretch! I lefthim %irh pleasure, walked into the drug store, out
again andhome. Never again!
Yours in despair of being an old maid.
Katherine Kent.
Margaret folded the note with a sigh. "Poor
Katherine, her plan was almost spoiled! One
more hope-Jack Morgan. Perhaps he would-
but-who knows?" And kind-hearted Margaret
decided to go up and cheer up Katherine.
When she entered the Kent gate, she paused.
Who was singing? She listened. It sounded
decidedlylike the deep, bass voice of Jack Morgan.
Was it? It must be! But what was he singing,
and where was he? The faint creaking of the
hammock was heard. She went nearer. Out on
the breeze floated a song which seemed to be in
keeping with the time and occasion.
"K-K-K--K.Lt, beautiful Katv,
You're the only g-g-g-girl that I idore"
Margaret closed the gate with an amused look
on her face. Katy didn't need any of her "cheer-
ing up." W'hat had happened to change things
so? Well, anyway, she knew Kate as happy
because she always said Jack was the nicest boy
she knew, only he needed a good "shaking up."
"Shakingup?" She repeated the words. He surely
had received a good one by this scheme of Kate's.
She reflected. Could it be possible that Kate had
deliberately tried to administer this shaking and
had therefore invented this scheme? She won-
dered.






THE ZONIAN.


UN DIA EN EL CANAL.
Ruth IVi!son, '20o.


Recogiendo el periodic una mariana hace
algunas semanas, lef estos titulos: "Gran der-
rumbe en el Corte de Culebra ayer." Esto basta-
ba para hacerme curiosa; asi es que cuando hube
leido todo el articulo, resolve pedirle a papA que me
Ilevara al trabajo con 61 el dia siguiente. Antes
de proseguir deben saber, Uds. mis lectores, que
papA trabaja en un remolcador, el cual, a causa
del derrumbe, estA en el corte de Culebra.
Yo le pregunte y como resultado fuimos, papa
y yo, al correo para esperar el jitney official que
lleva siempre a los empleados americanos al
trabajo.
Despu6s de un viaje por Corozal y los otros
pueblos, legamos a Paraiso. Alli subimos al
buque que Ileva a los trabajadores a sus diferentes
lugares. Fu6 alli que vi por primera vez el der-
rumbe. El imported de rocas, de lodo, de arena y
de barro era enorme. El corte estaba casi
cerrado. Una isla flotante estaba en el centro y
pasar era impossible. No habia trifico ninguno
por el canal, except por supuesto, las dragas y los
remolcadores que trabajaban sin parar.
Era necesario subir un alijador que estaba cerca,
para alcanzar nuestro remolcador que estaba al
otro lado del derrumbe pues no podiamos pasar
la isla flotante de otra manera. Los alijadores
estaban resbaladizos; la draga bulliciosa y desa-
gradable, y una vez abordo del remolcador, me
sent en un lugar quieto para esperar la comida.


*1


Nos habiamos atado a dos alijadores, lenos de
lodo y procediamos por el canal, cuando, fig6rense
mi sorpresa, of la exclamaci6n:
-No encuentro a cocinero ninguno!
Nos vimos en un apuro. Pero cuando uno tiene
hambre, hara cualquiera cosa para satisfacerla.
Pues, pronto el capitan, papa y yo bajamos a la
cocina y preparamos la comida. Dejo esa comida
a sus imaginaciones.
Despues de cuatro horas de navegar, Ilegamos
a una cueva. El contramaestre midi6 el agua, a
la hondura just nos paramos y el capitan grit6
en voz alta:
-Descarguen!
Un ruido de trueno cuando los dardos de los
alijadores se aflojaron, espumas de agua surgieron
al aire, nuestro remolcador se abalanz6 peligrosa-
mente, se me hel6 la sangre en las venas, y los
alijadores descargaron.
A este moment el proyector se apag6. Otra
vez nos vimos en un apuro serio. Pero el capitan,
con la mayor sangre fria, hizo volver el buque y
lentamente nos pusimos en march a Paraiso.
El viaje a ese pueblecito era grandiose. La luna
llena brillaba sobre el agua tranquila con un es-
plendor plateado. Las luces coloradas centel-
learon como astros lejanos. Las brisas frescas
agitaban el agua y las olas chiquitas arrullaron
suavemente contra el buque. Y escuchando alli
en la solitud de la noche quieta, me dormi.


am.

































N
0

Z
Z













I
BALBOA DRY DOCK AND SHOPS.






THE ZONIAN.


BALBOA DRY DOCK AND SHOPS.
Gecrge Danskin, 'zr.


The photograph reproduced on the opposite
page shows three ships in the dry dock of the Bal-
boa plant, one of the most efficient plants of its
kind in the world.
In determining the efficiency of a plant one
must consider the supervision, the equipment, and
the class of workmen employed. Under super-
vision we will consider how the supervisors are
chosen, their qualifications, etc.; under equip-
ment, all modern equipment; and under class of
workmen employed, their qualifications, how and
from where employed.
First we will examine the supervision. The
superintendent of the plant must be a naval con-
structor and a graduate of Annapolis, and one who
is capable of handling large groups of men. He
is appointed by the Secretary of the Navy. The
minor supervisors, such as the foremen and leading
men, are chosen from the shops by the superintend-
ent according to their efficiency and seniority of
service.
The equipment is of the latest and most im-
proved type. To illustrate we shall take the forg-
ing of a propeller shaft and the casting of a cyl-
inder. The propeller shaft is forged in the black-
smith forging shop where, in fi.rging, it will be
subjected to a pressure of 25,000 pounds by the
hydraulic presses and 2,500 pounds by the large
drop-hammers. After forging it is taken to the
machine shop and turned on one of the big lathes.
We will leave the forging here and return to the
foundry where the casting of the cylinder is made.
In its casting, crucibles capable of casting 25 tons
per day are used. The foundry can cast either
iron, brass, or steel. Then the job is taken to the
machine shop where, if very big, it will be planed
on the largest planer which has a travel of 24
feet by ii feet between the housing, by 7A feet
from the top of the house to the table. After
planing it will be taken to the large lathe which
has a swing of 14 feet by io0 feet in length. Then
it is finished off and both the cylinder and the
propeller shaft are taken to the dry dock where a
ship is being repaired. The dry dock is 1,000 feet


by Ino feet by 45 feet deep over the keel blocks.
A pontoon can be added to it making it approxi-
mately 1,050 feet. This dock can dry-dock the
largest ship in the world in about four hours. On
the far side of the dock can be seen the 50-ton
steam wrecking crane which runs along the edge of
the dock and lifts boilers from the boiler shop to the
ships. In the boiler shop there are some very in-
teresting and modern machinery, probably chief
among these are the steel plate rollers which roll
steel up to a thickness of 2 inches. Here also the
welding is done which saves the Canal thousands
of dollars a year. Three classes of welding are
done here. They are thermite, acetylene, and elec-
tric welding. Near the boiler shop is the car shop
which makes the cars for the Panama Railroad
Company and also for outside companies. A
passenger coach of native mahogany can be built
in from 5 to 6 weeks when only 4 men are
working on it. The machine for taking scrapped
wheels off trucks can exert a force of 200 tons,
There also is the planing shop in which all native
wood is handled and planed to a finely finished
piece of furniture from a rough tree. Nearly all
of the woodwork of the rebuilt Cristobal was made
here.
As to the workmen, they are the pick of the
States. All skilled labor must first be citizens of
the United States. All mechanics must have 2
years' experience after completion of apprentice-
ship. All mechanics are classified as first class
and must qualify or they are returned to the
United States.
All trades have a certain number of apprentices.
The apprentices advance every three months ac-
cording to their skill. They work with the reg-
ular mechanics on regular production work. They
are under the supervision of the shop foremen.
In order to make them proficient in their chosen
trade they are required to attend the apprentice
school which is held one afternoon, 4 hours,
per week. In the apprentice school they are in-
structed in mechanical drawing, blue print read-
ing, shop arithmetic, and practical engineering.


~~





i


aL~


s s r * ** "!!!!! !!!


29






THE ZONIAN.


If at the end of the 3 months they have not re-
ceived an average of 75 per cent they remain on
the same job for 3 months more. Then if the%
fail to receive such a grading they are no longer
employed as apprentices. The whole course is
4 years. If at the end of the apprenticeship
they have satisfactorily qualified they are given
certificates of proficiency signed by the Superin-
tendent of the Division, the Superintendent of
Schools, and by the Governor of the Canal.
This plant, as has been said before, is one of the
most efficient working plants of the world. As
an example of efficiency we will consider a few of
the many cases. The Von St.ib. n, formerly the
Crown Prince, was hit by a mine in the war zone,
her plates were buckled and the stern of her keel
was badly bent. A Philadelphia shipyard wanted


3 months to complete the job. The Canal
cabled to send her here. She was sent here and
finished in the record time of 17 days. Another
example is the case of the 5 interned German
ships which were towed from Peru where the\ had
been almost scrapped by the crew. They were
finished in app oximately one year. Still another
case is that of the Cristoba!. In the photograph
the 9,ooo-ton Cr:.'obaL/ is at the repair wharf.
The Crisiobal was practically reb:i:t at this plant.
It had been a freighter and was changed to a
passenger ship. This was finished in approxi-
mately 12 months. Most people in the States
do not realize that the Canal is the most efficient
canal of its type in the world and that it is of im-
portance in case of ~ '.-.


WHEN A FELLER NEEDS A QUARTER.
Gertrude van Harde:e!d, 'z2.


Jimmy Slade needed a quarter, and he needed
it badly. To-morrow would be his mother's birth-
day, and he had determined to buy her that beau-
tiful red handkerchief that was displayed in the
window, at the "Jew's." But the handkerchief
was marked with a prominent "25c." sign, and
Jimmy didn't have a cent, and what was worse,
he had no means of getting any money. He paced
up and down before the window, trying to get
an inspiration. Suddenly he was seized with a
bright idea. He entered the store and addressed
himself to the fat and bustling proprietor.
"Mr. Mogelewsky, do yuh need a boy tuh go
tuh th' post office 'r anything?"
"Ach, no!" was the reply, "get out of mine
schtore, yet!"
Jimmy got. He looked up and down the street.
At a near-by grocery store, a man was alighting
from a wagon.
"Hey, mister!" Jimmy ran toward the man,
"D'yuh want me tuh hol' yer h ,rse?"
"W'hv, son, that horse wouldn't stir from here
if he had wings to fly." The man smiled kindly
on the upturned face, and entered the store.
Jimmy journeyed a little farther up the street.
He saw a newsboy a;iprnichin- him.
"Cats and d yg;, rats and mice; a big long ladder
an' a pail of rice!" he greeted the other bur ith the
call of the gang. Kin I sell som. papers, Dick ?"
"All sold, 'cept a few that's promised." Dick
passed on and Jimmy sat down on the curb.


On the opposite curb sat a little Yiddish girl,
an acquaintance of his. She was playing with her
rag doll, and talking to it in Yiddish. He sur-
veyed her listlessly and then gazed down the
street. An automobile was coming toward him.
He arose from the curb, much as one does when
one has sat on a tack, and rushed across the street.
Seizing the rag doll from the loving grasp of
its fond pa en-, he threw it into the path of the
car. The little gi I sc gained as she saw her poor
child go under the wheels. The car stopped and
the man, who was driving, got out.
"What's the matter, little one?" he asked.
"You run over her doll an' she don't like it,"
stated Jimmy promptly.
The man smiled. "\\'hat's the damage?" he
inquired.
"S'x b:ts." Jimmy p onounceJ this verdict
after having confe.red wit' the lady in question,
in he- native tongue, and having waited for her
to sit down again on the curb with her wounded
doll.
The man grinned broadly. He put his hand
into his pocket and pulled out a quarter and a
5S cent piece. He dropped the coins into the
handoftheattornyv,got into his car,and drove off.
"Here, kid, thanks," and with a grin of content-
ment, Jimmy shoved the qo-cent piece into the
hand of his unwilling accomplice, and ran happily
down the street with the quarter.






THE ZONIAN.


0.


-Maria, Maria! A ver ese caf6, que ya es hora
de irme.
--Cuintas cosas quieres que haga a un tiem-
po? Vestir los chicos, encender lalumbre, y limpiar-
te los zapatos. JTe has vuelto loco, hombre?
-Y hacerme Ilegar tarde a la oficina!
-Que desgraciada soy!
-Vaya! Donde esta el caf&.
-En la lu-u-umbre-contesta Marii llorandD).
-Caramba! Que mujer! Mira lo que me has
hecho hacer. He derramado el cafe, roto dos
platillos y ya son las ocho y media-exclama
Antonio, el esposo, entrando a la sala carganda los
pedazos de los platillos y todo manchado dc cafe.
-Que desgraciada soy!
-No puedo esperar mAs. Me voy sin el cafe-
brama el esposo. Coge su gorro y se march de la
casa furioso.
Por la tarde lleg6 a la casa, con un mozo que
traia sobre la cabeza un catre, y con una mujer
de dimensions inmensas que a la vista parecia
una ninera.
-Mira, Maria, lo que te traigo. Ya puedes
perder cuidado. He traido a Dorotea para que
te ayude en los trabajos de la casa. Ahora puedes
dormir la siesta muy tranquila.
-Ay! Esposo mio! Que bueno eres-dijo Maria,
besindolo con much alegria.
Asi es que Dorotea, al dia siguiente tom6 cargo
de todos los chicos. Empez6 por baiiar y vestirlos
y a las ocho menos diez mand6 a los dos mis
grandes a la escuela.
Cuando Antonio lleg6 por la tarde, encontr6 a
Maria muy bien vestida y los chicos todos senta-
dos a la mesa. Di6 una mirada de aprobaci6n
y estaba muy satisfecho de su fortune.


-Si hubieras visto a Da:otea hoy. Roberto se
estaba baiando y al oir gritos, Dorotea corri6
hacia el ba.o y abriendo la puerta encontr6 el
baio Ileno de .ln y Roberto nadanlo para sal-
varse. Cogiendalo por las orejas lo sac6 del
baia le di6 dos coscorrones y vistiendolo, lo hiz:)
ir afuera a jugar-dijo M iri.i con risa.
-Caramba! Creo que DJrotea nos va a servir
muy bien-
El domingo despubs de misa, Antonio propuso
que todos fueran a la plaza.
-Dejaremos a Dorotea para que n Is cuide la
casa-aiiadi6 Maria.
A las tres, Maria, Antonio y los cuatro chicos
salieron para la plaza. Despues de divertirse
much se marcharon otra vez a la casa, muy
cansados y hambrientos. Pero cuando lIegaron
no encontraron ni a Darotea, ni-el care.
-Se ha Ilevado. hasta mis chinelas-dijo
Antonio.
-No s" porque se ha ido. NJ.otro3 la tratamos
muy bien--ijo Maria sentindose al lado de
una mesita.
--Qu6 es esto?-dijo, viendo un papelillo sobre
la mesa. Cogiendolo con asombro lo abrio v
ley6!

Sefinra Maria:
No puedo esperar hasta que ud. llegue para decirle que me
voV. Estay muv de prisa. Si me quedo aqui un dia mas los
chicos acabaran conmig Su esposo no me dijo que tendria
que cuid.tr a cuatro ma:ji.hos Ya eso es demasiado. No
se aparen p ,r mi salario que no lo quiero.
Adios, oiai sea para siempre.
Soy, su segura servidora (en otro mundo),
OROA desgraciada s
-Que desgraciada sov!


-/j


F-1 \1 ATRIlNI )N( l)L R.ACI Al-1) i






THE ZONIAN.


LES ILES DE PERLES.
Fra es WIVestberg, '0o.


Quel dr6le petit village! Il y a A peu pros quar-
ante huttes sur une colline. Les murs de huttes
sont faits de la boue rouge et du bambou. Les
toits sont faits des branches du palmier. II n'y a
qu' une grande chambre dans chaque hutte oil
les naturels mangent et o6 ils dorment et of ils
recoivent leurs amis; oh leurs poules, leurs chiens,
leurs chats, et leurs autres animaux dorment et
mangent; tout dans la m8me chambre. Les
huttes sont places dans des files avec un petit
sentier battu entire chaque file. On peut voir au
pied de la colline, des canots. Autour de quelques


huttes on troupe des plants qui se sont fanbes.
Devant chaque maisonette il y a un tronc d'arbre
creux sur lequel est plac- une planche qui tient du
riz vert qui y est plac6 pour se s-cher. Parmi
quelques huttes notables est la cour de Justice
qui &tait occupp6e autrefois par les pirates. Sur
le toit de cette butte des pirates il y a un drapean
blanc avec un squelette noir. On peut voir aussi
des ruines d'une vieille 6glise avec quelques statues
fanees et cass6es et un petit autel, mal netu, dela-
bre et tres sale.


PINK HANDKERCHIEFS.
Anita Sargent, '23.


Mary Ellen loved pink handkerchiefs, so when
her friends gave her some white ones for her
birthday she was very much disappointed. She
was a little angry, too.
That was in June. It took nearly a month for
Mary Ellen to decide what to do with those soft,
white things. Then a man representing the
Smythe's Soap and Dye works came to the little
village and gave a few public demonstrations.
Mary Ellen's question was settled. The insipid
white things became a beautiful deep pink.
One afternoon in July, Mary Ellen was going
to her aunt's house with some books-also her
pink handkerchief. The road was dusty, having
seen no rain for nearly a month. The few trees
here and there seemed to crave water, while the
parched, brown grass thought its end had come.
Not a breeze stirred anywhere. Looking in the
distance one could see the heat rising in dizy
lines above the country road. Mary Ellen was
hot and not very comfortable as she trudged on
with her books. Every step or two the pink
handkerchief was brought up to a very warm and
dusty face to wipe off the drops of moisture there.
It was with a sigh of relief that Mary Ellen,
consoled with thoughts of sugar cookies and large
glasses of lemonade, stood on her aunt's doorstep


and rang the bell. A step in the hallway, a fum-
ble at the latch, and Aunt Marie opened the
door. But instead of relieving the burdenef the
joy-anticipating niece, she stood, as tho' barring
her out, gazing at the moist and drooping face
before her.
"Mary Ellen!" she cried, "My goodness, child,
what have you got?"
"Books, Auntie," replied Mary Ellen, taking a
step forward.
"Get into this house!" went on Aunt Marie.
"Mercy me! What shall I do?"
Too puzzled to say anything Mary Ellen allowed
herself to be led into the parlor where her aunt told
her to "lie very still for just a few minutes." Of
course the "Iying still" was all right, but why
must Aunt Marie weep and wail and cry, "Oh,
oh, oh! I know you must be getting smallpox or
scarlet fever! Oh! oh! And Mary's only child! '
Now Mary Ellen was very superstitious, and
it didn't take long for her to be almost ill with
excitement and sympathy for herself. Lying with
eyes uplifted, looking at the ceiling angelically,
Mary Ellen reviewed her life's history, wiping
her face frequently with her handkerchief as she
thought of the times she had lain long hours in
bed instead of going to church. She wondered


#- ---




el
#--~-----






THE ZONIAN.


if, after she was dead, she would go to the.heaven
she had her doubts about, and if her loving
parents and friends would decorate her grave with
the pink roses she loved best.
About fifteen minutes later, Aunt Marie, weeping
and wailing, brought Doctor Rix, the only doctor
the village boasted of, into the parlor. He looked
very wise and important as he felt of the patient's
pulse and said, "Her pulse is beating normally."
Next he passed his hand over her perplexed brow.
Telling the somewhat consoled aunt that her
niece had no fever, the doctor requested that some
ice wrapped in a towel be put on Manr% Ellen's
forehead. In a few minutes the patient felt a
heavy sensation on her forehead. But the ice had
not been wrapped up well, for soon littlestreams of
water were making their course down Mary Ellen's
face.
As she wiped them off with her handkerchief,
Doctor Rix watched her face. He noticed that
more pink spots appeared. Turning to the aston-
ished aunt he said, "A little soap and water, please."
With vigor and soap and water, Doctor Rix
rubbed the patient's face. Lo! As Aunt \IJric


watched, the color disappeared. But her curiosity
was not satisfied until she saw the doctor wet Mary
Ellen's handkerchief and rubit on his hand. Spots
similar to those on Mary Ellen's face appeared.
The moon was bright and full as Mary Ellen
walked home that evening. She breathed in the
cool evening air and thought of her afternoon's
experience. When she reached her home she went
to her room where from a shelf she took a box of
pink dye, preparing to throw it out of her window
as far as she could. Carelessly turning it upside
down, she read on the bottom of the box,"Fast
colors not guaranteed."
The next day while at the drug store, Mary
Ellen met the man who sold her the dye. He
was trying to interest the owner of the drug store
in his soaps and dyes. As Mary Ellen entered,
he said, "If you don't believe my dyes are good,
ask this young lady what she thinks of them."
"Oh, they are very good for dyes whose colors
are not guaranteed to be fast," said that young
lady, trying to suppress a laugh behind a very
white and dainty handkerchief.


TOMMY'S STORY.
Cecile Lear, '22.


"It's time for the morning story," said teacher.
"Form a circle. That's it, children. Move up
closer."
The small children crowded nearer to teacher
and sat alert, eagerly waiting for the story to
begin.
"Once upon a time," began teacher, "there lived
in a far away country, a tribe of poor people. In
time of plenty they had barely enough to supply
their needs, but in the time of famine they were
desolate. This year there came upon the land a
worse famine than had ever been before, and the
poor people were unable to cope with it. Many
of them starved until at last there were only two
children left. They resolved to leave the place of
ill-luck and to seek their fortunes in another land.
The nearest place was over one hundred miles
away, and as they had no cart, they had to go
on foot. The path was long and stony and
danger faced them at every turn."
Just then teacher was attracted by a small
hand waving in the air.


"Well, Tommy?"
"Aw, teacher, I don't like that story. It's too
sorrowful. Gee, I could tell a better one than
that."
Teacher put away the book and sat up with
interest, saying, "Go ahead, Tommy."
Tommy strutted to the front of the room, looked
proudly at his small associates and started his story.
"Once upon a time there was a pirate chief
named Tommy. He had a great big pirate ship
and lots of pirates. He was very strong and
brave and his men were afraid of him 'cause he
made them walk the plank if they were bad.
None of the other ships came near this ship if
they could help it, 'cause the pirates robbed them
of their diamonds and money and then had big
bonfires on the ocean. Most of the boats carried
good things to eat and drink, and the men always
searched the boats and then took away all the
good things."
Tommy paused to see the effect of his story.
Everyone was watching him, except Jimmy, who






THE ZONIAN


was Tomm\'s worst enemy. He .ust sat back in
his seat and sneered. Revenge is sweet, so from
then on Tommy made Jimmy the villain of his
stor\.
"One day, as Captain Tommy was looking out
to sea, he 'spied a tinm sp.ck an.l said, '.ha! 'tis
the Il'File Sta,, sailing un.id r Captain Jimm'!
O'ertake her, my lads.
"In a short time they were near the ship anJ
made it surrender. Then the pirate chief an I his
men just climbed on the other ship an.. took all
the food d and %ine r.- their o'wn ship. They mi .1
all the people walk the plank, but they save.l
Captain Jimm', until latI Th-ii th-- hit Captain
Jimmy with paddles until h- crie.l an.l crime ,
and then they thrce him overb.-,ard and went
down to the dining rJ.jiim r, ear anj drink.'
"Wait a minute," interrupted teacher, "Jimmy,
I don't believe you were paying the least atten-


tion to Tommy's story. Come up here and see
if you can finish it."
Oh, that overbearing swagger as Jimmy took
the place of honor! Ir was the best time in the
world to show off before his classmates and
to get even with Tommy.
"Captain Jimmy wasn't shared at all when he
was throa.n into the water. He was the bravest
person there. He just swam around in the water
and picked up all the people and put them on the
white e Sti". He waited until the pirates were all
asleep and th-n he crept upon their shipand locked
them all in the dining room. He tied a big rope to
the pirate ship and towed it right to the city and
gave it to a policeman. The judge locked all
the pirates up in jail and gav, all the people on
the II'hile Star Slo. And everybody was happy
except the pirates."


THE POISONFD PIE.
Herbert .11, C'.. in, '2..


Bang! The ice-box door shut with a resounding
crash that all but tore it from its rusty hinges.
"Oh gee, mom," I whined, "where'd that piece
of pie go that I saved from supper?"
"Why, I believe Edna ate it this morning, son.
Why don't you eat your pie at the table like the
rest of the family ?"
"Ah-oh, Christmas-every time I save a -
well-I don't care-but for the love of Pete, mom,
that's about the tenth time somebody took my
pie-every time I put it away-'en then you try
to encourage me to save. First it's Ned, then
Edna, and then it's the baby. Why can't I eat
my pie when I want to? And--"
"Hush, that's enough. Now you go finish your
home work and then go to bed. Stop-I don't
want to hear another word out of you to-night."
I left to get my geometry book, muttering
vague, ominous threats as I did so.
Three dat s later I stood alone in the kitchen
working at a large and inviting piece of pie, but
I wasn't eating it. Revenge now dwelt within
my soul and crowded out all lesser passions. I
lifted the upper crust and dug out the center-
learing only the outer shell of mincemr.at around
the side. I picked up a bar of soap and with a
knife cut off enough thin slices to fill th. center
of my masterpiece. Between the layers of soap


I put pepper; or possibly I should say I put
the soap between layers of pepper. No one
would take mire than one bite of that pie-I
was sure. I laid the upper crust back as it was,
very ni:.-ly, and then set the pie in the ice-box,
before I wnt tu warn the faniily not to touch it.
Bat as I did this every day, it was nothing
unusual.
Next day whi:n I came hume I looked into the
ice-box. The pie was still there. The next day
I looked agiin. Still there. On the third day it
was gjne. I looked all over the kitchen to be
sure, but it was gone.
I walked into the room where my mother was
sewing.
",lom."
"Ye'."
"'\Vhre is my piece of pie?"
"I gave it to the colored girl this morning. It
had b-en there for several days and you didn't
seem t.j want it." I was stumped, but I had to
satisfy my curiostv, s) I tried again.
"'Did sh- like it?"
"I supp)e s )."
Ikept still for a moment, then,"Did she say she
.id ?"
"Sh. said something about it being a little
soapy, but she seemed to like it."













in-


II _.."... . 41
















GAILLARD CUT.






THE ZONIAN.


CLASS PROPHECY.


FOWLERBANTON ....
SUSIE ALLEN........
ROBERT GETMAN.....
MURO GOLDEN .....
JOHN KULLER.......
(G ErCIA El Lw'RT H


BRIDML PARTY.


JoHN K. LLER
ROBERT GETrMA% AD LILE. \%OMACK.
GEORGIA ELLS;ORTH ND ST'.iE .ALLEN
Ct AR. WOOD
HARRN GRIER

AFTER Six YEARS.


N Minister
Best men
.Bridesmaidi
Bride
Groom


. General h-nds -man to T. A. Edison
.Private secretary to Robert Getman
.. .. Chicago pulorician
.. ... Football coich, Illin i-.
.. Bi-hop ot Panama
. General .lnacer, Lirngerie
Fact.,r,,, Tro., N. Y.


HARRY GRIER ......... I. in .er in Detroit
MARIA HI .' ECK.ER ........... Metropoliran acoC lpaniist
JANE CALVIT......Physical directres-. Sargent School, Mals.
FRANCES THORNTON .......... W.ashington oioceitv bille
ALBERT THAYER ................Americin Consul to Panama
CLARA WOOD...........Confidential secretary i.. law tirm ol
Grier & Brot ning
RUTH WILSON........ Countess Felix Esperanzj de Castillo
WILLIS PRESSELL............. Forest ranger, Calilurni.
LYiE WOMACK ...........Rancher in Colorado, cartor.nilt for
Demr,.r P.:st
MARTHA ZARAK ..... .Bacteriologist in Colorado Uni ersitv
WILLIAM CHRISTIAN..... 2d baseman on Chic.'no White 5So\
MABEL LEE ..... Short story writer, summer home in the
H tan an il.lnd
WARREN JORDAN .. .Scientific horticulturtsr, expert gr ifrer
DAVID NEVILLE. ............. Mining engineer, Chile
ANNA SIRE.......... ........ ngaiaed \\i li
FRANCES WESTBERO .....Teacher of French and .Span.ih in
T.illaha%,er, F i
CARLA SITH...... Stage manneq-r for Shakeipe.re in pl.,n
in St. l. oui,
HELE MLLOY .......... Kindergarten teacher in Ethical
Cuurure Schonl, New York Cli

Enter Ruth, Robert, and Lyle.
Ruth speaks: 'Robert, did you remember to
order that extra dozen of roses? And those three


dozen little cakes? And did you make sure to
tell Susie and Georgia to be here at 8 o'clock
sharp? And--"
Robert.-"Say, what do you think I am? One
at a time, please."
Ruh.-"Well, goodness! I'm so excited I don't
know what to do! I hope everything comes out
all right and I certainly trust Harry didn't over-
look anyone when he sent the summons."
Lyle.-"No, he didn't, because I looked over
the list myself, so a thing like that wouldn't
happen. Harry surely thought of a dandy way
of fulfilling his pledge!"
Robert.-"Do you know, it's been such a long
time since the banquet that I've almost forgotten
Harry's pledge, to say nothing of the details.
Harry drew the pledge by lot, didn't he, Lyle?"
Lv/,.--"Yes, don't tell me you've forgotten.
\We had 23 blanks in envelopes and on the
twenty-fourth was written that pledge we worked
so hard over. I don't think I'll ever forget it.
I just bet I can say it now."
Robert.-"Well, what's stopping you?"
Ly/e.-"Nothing. Here goes-'\e, the class
of '20, do hereby solemnly bind ourselves to
gather at your command any time during the
year, 1926, at any place which you may
designate.' Now, say I can't remember things."
Ruth.-"Oh! For pity sake, settle down and
tell me what time it is. You haven't grown up a
bit. You're just as bad as you were in high
school."
Robe'rt.-"No lectures, Countess. It's just 8
and --"
Knock at door.
Ruth.-"Oh, I wonder who it is. Now, don't
either of you let the cat out of the bag and watch
me above all things. When I wink, excuse your-
selves as soon as you can, but don't let anyone
suspect.
Another knock.
Ruth.--"Hurry, Lyle, and see who it is."
Ruth and Robert talk together in dumb show.
Lyle opens door. Enter Frances Thornton, Anna,


RUTH WILSON, '2.
CARLA SMITH,' 2).

Place, Hotel Ponchartrari, Daroit.r Alh.
Timne, 8 p. m., June, 19.6.

DRAMATIC PERSON.F..


.







THE ZONIAN.


and Willis.-"Why! just look who's here. A real
Countess! Maybe I wasn't surprised to get your
wedding announcement. How's the Count?"
(Ruth and Willis talk in dumb show. Frances
Thornton goes over to talk to Robert, Anna goes
toward Lyle.)
Frances.-"Why, yes, I've had a good time
these last 6 years."
Robert.-"Yes, I can't even pick up the Wash-
ington Times without reading something about
you. How do you like being a society belle?"
(Continue talking in dumb show.)
Lyle (who has been talking in dumb show to
Anna).-"Why are you hiding your left hand?
Let's see! Oh Who is he?" (All look at
Anna. Anna blushes.)
Anna.-"Willis will tell you."
Willis.-"Give me your congratulations be-
cause I'm he."
Frances.-"How did it happen?" (Talk to-
gether.)
Knock at door. Enter Frances Westberg,
Muro, and Mabel.
Muro.-"How'dy, everybody? Look whom
I've brought! A budding young authoress, a
linguist and last, but, of course, not least, myself,
football coach for the champ team of Illinois."
Anna.-"Is that what you've been doing all
these years?"
Muro.-"Yes, part of the time. Frances Thorn-
ton's been having the career, and (walks to Ruth)
Ah! Countess Felix Esperanza de Castillo (bows),
I believe. (Ruth and Muro talk.)
Willis.-"And you, Frances W., what have you
been doing?"
Frances W.-"Oh! Trying to drill French and
Spanish into Florida high school students' heads.
I pity Miss Frost if we were ever such a trial to
her. But how about you? You've been out west,
haven't you?"
Willis.-"Yes, for the last 3 years. Recently,
I've been trying my hand at forest ranging.
There's Mabel and Ruth with their heads close
together. What have you been doing, Getman?"
Robert.-"Hum! A Chicago politician, at your
service. But that's nothing to the tales Mabel
can tell you of the Hula-Hula girls in Hawaii.
How about it, Mabel?"
Mabel.--"No", Robert, you know I haven't been
telling you a thing about Hula-Hula girls. I've
never even seen any, I've been too busy writing."


Muro.--"\ll, if Mabel hasn't written about
them, Lyle's cartoons in the Denver Post have
certainly shown them true to life. Eh, Lyle?"
Lyle.-"Oh- ." (Loud knock. Enter Maria,
Jane, Helen, Albert, and Warren.)
Maria (laughing)-"W'ell, this certainly seems
like old times. You can't guess the news I've
brought. Pinky's the American Consul to Pan-
ama!"
Albert.-"Hum! That's a much more dignified
position than banging on the piano all day for
poetic song birds.
Jane (to everyone, in surprise).-"Why, of all
things. When did you all arrive? Hello, Frances
Westberg. How has the world been using you,
these last 6 years?"
Frances W.-"Oh, I've been teaching school as
I always said I would. What have you gone in
for?"
Jane.-"Teaching, too, and I've certainly had
my hands full, trying to make fat girls thin and
thin girls fat." (Goes to Anna.) "And what's
Anna been doing?" (Talks to Anna in dumb
show.)
Helen (who has been talking in dumb show to
Willis).-"Yes, indeed! I've been busy! Kinder-
garten children aren't particularly fond of lessons
in morals." (Continues talking to Willis.)
Robert (who has been talking to Warren)-
"Don't try to tell me that you've been working.
Weeding garden beds isn't work."
Warren.-"Huh! Lot you know about horti-
culture. All I've got to say is that it takes more
brains than it does to be a politician." (Looks
toward label and Albert, who are laughing.)
"What's the joke, Nliabl? Tell us so we can
laugh, too."
Albert.-"Oh! Mabel was just trying to make
me believe -"
Knock at door.
Ruth.-"Oh, Robert." (Beckons to him and
winks at Lyle. They exit.)
Albert.-"I bet that's Billy."
EnterWilliam, Martha,Carla, David,and Fowler.
William.-"Hello, what's that about me,
Pinky?" (Speaks to Albert in dumb show.)
Frances Thornton to Carla.-"Oh, Carla, darling,
you haven't changed a bit. And, Martha, it does
me good to see you again. Did you come to-
gether ?"







THE ZON AN.


.Martra.-"Oh,my, .vs' Carla got on the train
at St. Louis and we've talked every minute of the
way since."
Carla.-''Sarthn's been trying to convince me
of the joys of teaching bacteritol,.ig., but let me di-
rect Shakespearian plays any day. We met David
and Fowler and Bill Jownstairs and they've
literally deafened us with their chatter about
mining and electricity and Billy is determined
that there's nothing like baseball."
Albert.-"Well, I can't say I agree with him.
I'd much rather attend a tea than throw around
baseballs in the scorching sun."
Frances Thornton.-"' h, that's all very well,
but I know something you don't know."
Albert.-"Oh, what?"
Maria.-"Hurry up! Tell us!"
Janie.-"This suspense is dreadful." .11 try
to urae Frances to hurry and tell her secret.)
Frances.-"\\Vll, I think Anna and Willis had
better come up front since it particularly concerns
them."
Anna.-"Oh "
S11'I.<'..- 'Not --"
Fo;-ihr.-"Oh! I bet I can guess!"
David.-"Looks easy, anyway, if appearances
speak for anything."
Frai,~ .--"Then I guess I can't tell you after
all." (Holds up Anna's left hand.) "Isn't it a
beauty'"
Muro.-"Well, I should say!" .All gather
around Anna and \\illis.)
Mabel.-"What's keeping Harry, any way?
He certainly wouldn't pla\ a joke on us!"
Wedding march is heard.


Hetr.--"\\'h that's 'Here comes the bride!'"
I(All looked surprised. Enter bridal party.)
llarti.-"\- hy, lookat Johnny!" (Allstareand
step back. forming an opening through which the
bridal party marches.,

Curtain.
SCENE II.

At rise of curtain all are giving congratulations.
All stop talking and sing:

ENiOR-R FAREWELL.

Dedic.ited to the Clas-. of i 91
',r Till '.e Nl.et AEg in

There's a thrill in the hearts of the Seniors.
Of love ';:.r ol1 B Ilbo. HKgh,
For the :>,rk %e have done.
The friends 1e h.iie won,
As the Senior C;-.si hisper good-by.

CHOR i..

We'll smile the while we bid adieu to you.
As the :.ca.r roll bh ":' II think rof .'ol,
And .,ur hear: til' rsill hb true
To rh: in.:n 'rics 4-hrricl in o.u.
Smile ar.d le.r. ''Il .:ome unbidden then,
While c .Ir.imn th.' %,:;r pa-t u cr .ig in,
Those d'.. % r.or b. in RabIh.. High.
W e .%ill livt i w iun.

Tho' the ship hear us f:r o'er the ocean
To you will itr thought often fly,
An.l '.ur Ir,-.ns we'll keep,
In iemotry deep,
We, the Seni.,r- or B.-lbo.i High.-Chorus.






THE ZONIAN.


GREEN STOCKINGS.


The Class of 1920 made its bow to the public
in "Green Stockings," a clever comedy of English
life, by A. E. W. Mason, with the following cast
of characters:


Celia Faraday ...... _............ .....
Madge (Mrs. Rockingham) -........
Evelyn (Lady Trenchard).......-.......
Phyllis Faraday.-.......- .... ....
Mrs. Chisholm Faraday (Aunt Ida).
Colonel John Smith...............
William Faraday ...........
Adm iral G rice ......................
Robert Tarver.................
Henry Steele
James Raleigh ..........
Martain (the butler) ......


......... MABEL LEE
FR.AsCE.S THORNTON
.... CLARA WooD
.MARIA HUNSECKER
CARLA SMITH
-. WILLIS PRESSELL
JOHN KILLER
.. MRO GOLDEN
ALBERT THAYER
.... ROBERT GETMAN
WILLIAM CHRISTIAN
DA\ID NEVILLE


The play "derives its title from an old English
custom of making an elder unmarried daughter
wear green stockings at the wedding of her younger
sister.
Celia Faraday, the leading lady, a young woman
of vivid imagination and a keen sense of humor,
really a charming girl if ever anyone had taken the
trouble to look at her, became weary of being the
person who sees to everything but whom nobody
sees, who is necessary to everybody's comfort but
to nobody's pleasure, and is openly pitied and
passed by, because, forsooth, her younger sisters
have married before her. When Phyllis, the
pretty and frivolous youngest sister fretted be-
cause she would not be allowed to announce her
engagement since her oldest sister remained un-
married, and even referred to the fact that Celia
must for the third time put on green stockings at
a sister's wedding, and Mr. Faraday openly chafed
because as long as his eldest daughter remained
unmarried, he could not shut up his establishment
and live at his club, the iron of injustice entered
Celia's soul. Arriving home unattended and find-
ing the family ruefully discussing her painful po-
sition, and seeing that if it were but possible to
announce her engagement the family would feel
the disgrace wiped out, she rose to the occasion
and promptly invented a lover and an engagement,


though to herself and to Aunt Ida she confided
that it would be necessary to kill the imaginary
lover at the end of 8 months. Even Cinder-
ella was not more transformed. The family show-
ered attentions upon her. Everybody basked in
the light of her countenance and her slightest wish
was anticipated. All the eligible men of their
circle, old, rni.illc-aged, and young, schemed to
outwit the others and have a word with her pri-
vately. Celia had come into her own and every-
body acknowledged her charm and loveableness.
For 8 months she reigned a queen. Then
came the announcement in The Times of the death
of Colonel John Smith, Somaliland, "of wounds,
October i 1." Consternation seized upon the fam-
ily. But their grief was not a selfish contemplation
of shattered hopes, but a real sympathy for her in
her sorrow. However, Celia, heroically decided
that the death of her fiance whom the family had
never seen should not be allowed to interfere with
the family routine. She would soon hide herself
and her grief in Chicago, but in the meantime do
her part in securing B..bI, Tarver's election to
Parliament. At this juncture Colonel Smith's
friend, Colonel Vavasour, appeared with a card
bearing Colonel Smith's dying message to Celia.
Then was revealed a complication of which Celia
never dreamed. Some kindly disposed member of
the family had mailed Celia's first love letter to the
imaginary John Smith and some real John Smith
had received it. Quickly seeing his advantage,and
ruthlessly holding to it, Colonel Vavasour played
his part until the time for revealing the fact that
Colonel Vavasour and Colonel Smith were identi-
cal arrived. That Celia should make her engage-
ment entered into in jest, an engagement carried
out in earnest, was the only course open to her,
and necessity and inclination seemed coincident.
"Green Stockings" was put on at Panama,
Corozal, Cristobal, Culebra, Gatun, Ft. Sherman,
Ft. Amador, Coco Solo. and Balboa, each time
with great success.
Mabel Lee in the part of Celia, the unnoticed
girl who at last came into her own, was charming.


9


#=-----~





lo







THE ZONIAN.


She interpreted her difficult part with understand-
ing and executed it with ease and grace. Colonel
John Smith Vavasour was excellently shown by
\\illis Pressell who played to perfection the part
of a friend loyal to the dead, yet with an cye to
his own advantage. The fashionable, ease-loving,
self-centered father, Mr. Faraday, was enacted bN
John Kuller. It seemed so natural that he should
have his desires gratified that we could sce at a
glance how inconsiderate and selfi6h it was that
Celia should keep him from living at his club
through the failure tu find him a suitable son-in-
law. Fun-loving Maria Huinsecker fitted perfectly
into the part of prtct thoughtless Phyllis, dying
to announce her engagement with Bobby l'arver,
and vexed with Celia lfr seeming to stand in her
way. As a young English swell of limited mental-
ity and unlimited selfishness, Albert Thayer scored
a great success. The two, in the sublime uncon-
sciousness of utter sclfishness h ought itr much
laughter. Carla Smith plav.ed a good Aunt Ida,
the only one A ho really saw Cclia, and %k hom Celia
had to take into the secret of her unbearable po-
sition. L.oyall% Aunt Ida kept the secret of the
shadowy Colonel Smith, sent the telegram tu The


Times which made him "die of wounds at Berbera"
and with equal loyalty and ardor, mourned his
death in a realistic attack of hysterics. The parts
of the two successfully married sisters, Madge and
Evelyn, were taken by Frances Thornton and
Clara W'ood, respectively, and most creditably
done. The tender-hearted, bluff old sea dog,
Admiral Grice, was given splendidly by Muro
Golden, and the two young men about town,
glad to see and worship Celia when they really
saw her, we-e interpreted by Robert German and
William Christian. David Neville made a splen-
did butter, and played his part with such dignity
an.l imperturbilitv as would make him a treasure
in any family.
The play of 1920 has been a success. All the
people grew into their parts and gave them with
an understanding, grace, and naturalness which
reflected much credit upon themselves and their
class adviser, Miss McKclvey, upon whom also
has developed the task of their training. Only
those concerned in the preparation and giving of
a high school play have any conception of the
hard work and fun connected with it. Honor to
the Class of iz92 and their adviser!

















































I


Ar

t;".,:Fc
S~Y;~". -2


(OLON.


ii


-~ra~a~..~u~~;ra~*I~k~s~.~i~I~2~vbC~5~-r






THE ZONIAN.


AL


imw'2o


Susie Allen, '2o.


THE SENIOR TRIP TO THE PEARL ISLANDS.
Thanksgiving day will long be remembered by
the Class of'20. They not only enjoyed the usual
activities of that day but also a delifihtful trip to
the Pearl Islands.
The party left Balboa at 2.30 (- i
a.m. Andaboutfivehourslater
the landed and were preparing
a hearty breakfast. During
the day many enjoyed them-
selves swimming, boating, and
exploring the island. Several I I o
of the party were successful in
purchasing some good pearls
from the natives of the village.
A regular picniclunch was pre-
pared with the assistance of
Mrs. Smith and Miss McKel-
vey, who proved to be excellent
cooks. After a light supper
the remainder of the provi-
sions were divided among the
natives. It was then time to
start for home and soon the
party bade adieu to the
island. At 10.30 the boat
docked at Balboa, and, al-
th'IuLh tired, everyone was heard to say that
the trip was one that would always be remem-
bered.


THE SENIOR HALLOWE'EN' PARTY.
The Class of '20 held a delightful Hallowe'en
party at the home of Carla Smith. The house
was tastefully decorated for the occasion with
witches, goblins, pumpkins,
and other realistic decorations
p for such a party. Those in
costume looked their prettiest
and it was much fun trying to
guess whotheywere. Thereg-
ular Hallowc'en games, such
as ducking fir apples and pie-
eating contests, were played.
SAfter a dainty luncheon the
7 merrymakers gathered around
a witch fire and here told many
J wonderful ghost tales and sang
old songs. Then"HomeSweet
Home" was played and every-
one left saying that the even-
ing was a most pleasant one.

THE FACULTY PART'.

On St. Valentine's evening
the Class of'2o entertained the
Faculty at the home of Maria
Hunsecker. Much credit must be given to those
who helped decorate the home so prettily. A
very pleasant evening was spent and many inter-







THE ZONIAN.


testing games were played for which the winners
were crowned king and queen of the evening. The
singing game in which each person was obliged to
write a verse to some familiar tune and sing it
before the audience, was most interesting.
After the program the girls were asked to
search for little arrows which were hidden about
the house. Mr. Nicholas was chosen auctioneer
and with the arrows the girls bid on the boys
who were to be their partners during the lun-
cheon. When each girl had her partner and had
seated themselves comfortably, a dainty luncheon
was served. The party was considered a real
success.


CHRISTMAS FESTIVAL.

Mi, s Frost was kept pretty
busy receiving wonderful pack-
ages for many days before the
eventful evening. Thesepack-
ages were the gifts which were
to be hung on the Christmas
tree.
Finally the night arrived and
in due time the girls and boys
with their parents made their
appearance in the beautifully
decorated Assembly Hall.
The following program was
well applauded:
Piano selection. ... ..Ethel Brady
Piano selection....... Ethel Getman
Reading-The Christmas
Carol............... Carla Smith
Reading-The Hazing of
Valiant. . . . .W illis Pres ell
Vocal solo-Just Awearvin'
for You. ........ Margaret Allen

Trio (two violins and piano) ...

Living pictures:
Three Wise Men .


Adoration of the Wise Men

Peace on Earth ..... ...


Elsie Sundquist,
Cornelia van Hardeveld
Ethel Getman
SCatherine Parmeter
.. Catherine Campbell
1 Carla Smith
SAnna Boyd
Carla Smith
SCatherine Parmeter
.Catherine Campbel


After the program Santa with his pack over
his shoulder appeared and his only excuse for giv-
ing such wonderful gifts was that the war was
over. May Duncan made up splendidly as Santa,


as she has a pleasant way and jolly face to take
that part. The audience enjoyed very much the
witty remarks and compliments passed by her
during the evening. Whl.n the gifts were dis-
tributed it was time to go home, and all left feel-
ing pleased with their new gifts.

PARENTS' RECEPTION.

The Domestic Science rooms of the Balboa
High School were prettily decorated for the recep-
tion given by the faculty and students to the
parents. A very successful program which con-
sisted of piano and violin numbers, vocal solos,
and reading was carried out.
The parents appeared much
pleased and the reception was
considered a true success.

FAREWELL RECEPTION TO
MR. MANNING.

L The faculty and student body
entertained most delightfully
S at a reception given in honor
of Mr. M\iiiiii. The receiv-
ing committee saw to it that
everybody was acquainted and
comfortable. Many beautiful
piano and violin numbers were
rendered.
.lr. l.lrl inr was much sur-
-*. prised with the traveling bag
presented to him by the fac-
S ulty and students, and also
pleased with the spirit in
which it was given. We know
that we shall long remember Mlr. Manning and
hope that the traveling bag will help to keep us
in his memory.

THE JUNIOR DANCE.

The dance given by the Juniors on the 9th
of April, was well attended and was considered
a great success. This dance was *iy,, in order
to raise money to help toward the publication
of THE ZONIAN.
Wright's orchestra furnished the music and
everybody seemed to have enjoyed themselves.







THE ZONIAN.


ATHLETICS.
DA.id .Xe:ie, '.'o


For 9 years the Zone high schools have partici-
pated to a degree in athletics. Athletic interest
and ability have steadily increased, probably
induced by increased attendance. Last year left
a notable mark on our escutcheon, the lightweight
basket ball championship of Panama and the
Zone, which feat,up to date of publication, we .-e
no promise of equaling.
Athletics received a severe reverse in the first
semester when some of our athletes were barred
from school and class activities for the semester.
They undertook a holiday on the anniversary of
armistice day, which-unfortunately-was nut a
legal holiday.
The Freshman class brought little material
this year which could be utilized to replace Cope-
land, Miller, Brumby, Watson and Manassa, s.'
the return of Golden and AMcM:ahuin, U. S. A.,
was welcomed.
A succession of obstacles prevented the inter-
class meets and competitive athletics we have
heretofore held, and the school was forced to
vent its energies in gymnasium and swimming.
These logically seem to be better for the school
as a whole, than a number of teams, as a star
basketball player in the seat next to you is nt
necessarily conducive to good digestion.

BASKET BALL.

Basketball is still our most popular sport.
This year's team has not taken the popular f.ncy.
as did last year's, although a vociferous mob iof
rooters have turned out to almost every gamr,
who made up in lung capacity what they lacked
in numbers and to whom the team tender, it,
thanks.
You will see by the following scores, in order
of their dates, that 5 games have been played
with but one 1'4., to Cristobal High:
KHalh..i .h, ...,. Balboa High School. Won, 12-43.
Cristobal High School .. H.ill ,,n1 ichcr I Won, 21-28.
Crisrobal High School es. Balboa Hzgh School. Lost, :i 14
Cristobal High School es. Balboa High School. Won, %'- j
Balboa N\. ..1 I'.,rrl -s. B.,lloa High School. Won, :t,.


Christian was our leading scorer with Golden
and Kuller doing the heavy work in the field.

CRISTOBAL HiGH -CHOOL VS. BALBO.- HIGH.

The series of three games with Cristobal High
%,ere ah fast and clean as could possibly be desired.
The teams were closely marched,Cristobal playing
a steady dependable game in all three, and the
same could be said of Balboa, but for their shoot-
ing which at tiines was wild in the cttremc.

FiRi T C A. E.
C2n.:'Ma,. Ba.boa.
ar<. f'. CGoldcn. f.
R.I mr'.nd, I. Chrin.in, '.
Hlnr,:r, r Kuller,-c.
Al Do,le. :. NManissa. e.
H.irrl,:.n, g. Nc \ ile, e.
Ferg.us.n. 1.
P. D.% le, f.
S'ib- titurci ior Balboa: Landers, g.; Jordan, g.; German.
FPeld gal.--Seirs 4, R.aymond 3 Henter 3, Christiin 1o,
( -lIden i. Kuller, r .
Foul goals--AI. Do. le.
Rereree--Mr. Huehes. Scorer-Grobe.

SECOND GV.IE.
...a.l Ba.0.i .
Sear. 1. Christrin. '.
\1. D yle, McMahon, f.
S.-l.mon. c. Kullcr, c.
Ra., in nd, g. N,:ille g.
Henrer, g. l.-inders,
H.irr-on, a.
Sjbtirlturte fur Bilboi--Gtrman, g.; Jo.dan, g.
-Icld goals-Scirs, Henrer s, Chrrii.nn ,. McMaNhon ,
kullr. ..inders.
Foul go.ls-Sears, Chritun :
Refree-Mr Hughe,. Su.rer- (robe.

rHIPDC4G fE.


C' r s'a!.
Searr. I.
Al. D )Ile, I.
Sflom.in, L.
Ra mond, L.
Harrison, g.
Henier, '.


Balboa.
Golden, f.
Chrsi r.n, I
Kuller, c.
Neville, g.
.anders, g.


IiHX6iI


---







THE ZONIAN.


Substitutes for Balboa-Getman, g.; Jordan, g.
Field goals-Sears 3, Golden 2, Christian 3, Kuller, Landers.
Foul goals-Sears, Henter, Golden.
Referee-Mr. Hawkes. Scorer-Grobe.

BASEBALL.

Our experiment in base ball was rather tenta-
tive but netted good results.

THE TEAM.

Capwell, c; McMahon, p (Captain); Landers, Ist; Kelly,
2d; Christian, ss; Pena, 3d; Golden, I; Fabi, Neville,
Brown, Morton, outfield.
The following games were played:
Balboa shops ... .. io Balboa H. S . 8
Cristobal High School. 5 Balboa H. S.
PedroMiguelmarried men o Balboa H. S 6
PedroMiguel married men 3 Balboa H. S 4
OTHER ACTIVITIES.

Tennis has come into popularity this year and
so many have become interested that a tourna-
ment is being projected.
Mr. Burkholder has made a commendable suc-
cess of the gymnasium and twice a week a lively
class spend some profitable hours there.

AQUATICS.

This year's swimmers have held no official meet
nor played any games as a high school unit, but
water-polo and other water sports played in the
regular routine of swimming class is developing
some deep chested strong winded athletes, with
truly Irish perception and self reliance in a scrim-
mage.
TRACK.

The High School held their annual interclass
track meet on Saturday, April o1. Thanks to the
ability of their girls, the Juniors won the meet.
Ethel Getman, Junior, and William Christian,
Senior, were first and second highest scorers and
captured first in every event they entered. They
added 30 and 25 respectively to the points of their
classes.


Boys. Girls. Total.
46 3 49
- 3. 63


Seniors
Juniors
Sophomores
Freshmen


too-yard dash.
W. Christian, time, 10.4 seconds (Senior).
L. Landers (Junior).
W. Jordan (Senior).


44o,-yarddash.
\\. Christian, time, 5i seconds \\. Jordan (Senior).
L. Wonmack (Senior).

220-yard dash.
W. Christian, rime, 24 seconds (Senior.
I.. Landers (Junior).
W. Jordan (Senior).

High Jump.
R. German, height, 5 feet (Senior).
I.. Landers (Juniori.
T. Knapp (Junior).


Runniin0 Broad
W. Christian, distance,
F. McMahon (Juniorl.
R. German (Senior,.


pfeet Seor
l- feet (Senior).


Shot Put.
I.. Landers, distance, 26 feet S inches (Senior).
J. Kuller (Seniori.
I.. Wunoack (Senior).

Standing Broad juni.
W. Christian, 8 feet 6 inches (Seniol .
F. McMahon (Junior).
L. Landers (Junior).


440o-ya' rela r.
Seniors (W. Jordan, L. Wom.ack, F. Banton, \\.
Christian.)
Juniors (L. Landers, C. ( '1 i. l ii, T. Knapp, F.
McMahon.)

TENNIS.

The Juniors are again victorious, winning the
Tennis Tournament with a total of 25 points.
The Seniors were second with 13 points, the Fresh-
men third with 5 points, and the Sophomores
fourth with I point.
Elois Pearson and Leonard Landers were the
main point winners for their class as they took
first place in all events.

Boys' Sint/es.
I.. Landers (Junior).
2. Robt. Getman (Senior).
3. \\m. Sargent (Sophomore).

Girls' Sinie's.
1. l',lois Pearson (Junior).
2. Jane Calvit (Senior).
3. Ethel Brady (Freshman).

Boys' Doubles.
i. E. Brady and L. Landers (Junior).
2. W. Christian and W. Pressell (Senior).






THE ZONIAN.


Girh" Doub/lei.
a. F. Pcarcon and E. German IJuniorl.
:. Ethel Brady and Arla Green iFre.hmen'
J. Jane Calni and Carla Smith IScnlor


.Mixed Donb'e.r.
a. Elois Pearson and .. Landers I Junior)
:. Jane Calvit and Robert Getman 'Seniorl.
S.. Clifton and Aria Green Il-reshmeni.


GIRLS' ATHLETICS.
Frincis .11. II 'cji .re. '._, -.


"Janet, what are the high school girls going to
do, now that school is closed?" asked Janet's
mother. "This influenza epidemic ma\ last tor
several weeks."
"W'ell, we were supposed to have a track meet
March 20, but we didn't get enough practice,
so I don't know when the track meet will be held.
\We are going to hate our interclass tennis tourna-
ment during Easter week. This counts for the
silver cup which Is given to the class which wins
the most point; received tfrm basket ball, tennis,
track meet, aquatic meet. etc.," answered Janet
nearly out of breath, as she seldom said so much
at one time.
"W'ho won tirst place in basket ball?" asked
Janet's mother, who was ver\ much interested in
her daughter.
"The Juniors w..n first place, the Seniors sec.-nd
place, the Freshies won third place. The ['reshies
and Sophomores were tied ;or the third place, and
another game was played and the Freshies won.
If the Freshies had c-.nl had th.: team sw.rk that
they had in tht last few games, I think they ,would
have won second place, or even first place. Moth-
er, they showed more improvement than any of
the other teams; even i' I am n Senior and saS so.
As for the aquatic meet, that has been set for
April 24. They had a airls' preliminary meet but
that didn't count for the cup,so none of the Snior


girls wrnt into it. Oh! I'm so sleepy," said Janet
yawn ing.
"\ell, daughter, y:3u'd better go to bed. But
please tell me, who was the referee in your basket
ball games," said Mrs V.
".ll right mother, I'll go to bed in a minute.
First %we had Miss Robinson, then Mr. Atraway,
then Mr. Burkholder. \\e all liked Mr. Burk-
holder's refereeing. \'e had fewer quarrels when
he refereed, and vwe enjoyed the games ever so
much. No matter who the referee was, we enjoyed
the games all the same.
"\'Well, guod night," said Janet kissing her
in other.
The next morning Janet woke up, ate her
breakfast and read the SIla and Herald. The
headlines said that the ban was lifted and school
would start Monday morning.
Three ncrtices were seen Monday afternoon on
the front black board. "The athletic meet will
will be held April 1o," "The tennis tournament,
April i-," and "The swimming meet, April 24."
As Janet arrived home, her mother exclaimed
"How late you are, Janet."
"Yes, I am quite late, but they have decided on
the days for the athletic meet, tennis tournament,
and the sw imming meet. So I was out to practice
running high and broad jumping," said Janet
puffing, as she was still overheated.







THE ZONIAN.


Qxdcange

Maria Hunsecker, '20o.


---I----I--- -


We are sorry, to say that not many exchanges
have been received. This might be due to the
high cost of paper. We would welcome more
comments from other papers.
We acknowledge with thanks the following
exchanges:
The Argonaut, Mansfield, Mass.
Argus, Gardner, Mass.
Canary and Blue, Allentown, Pa.
Classicum-Ogden H. S., Ogden, Utah.
CommerceLife-H. S. of Commerce, Columbus, Ohio.
The Early Trainer-Essex County Training School, Law-
rence, Mass.
Florida Flambeau, Tallahassee, Fla.
The Hleadlight-Garfield Junior H. S., Richmond, Ind.
H. S. Herald, Westfield, Mass.
l. S. Recorder, Saratoga Springs, N. Y.
John Marshall Record, Richmond, Va.
The Lincolnian-Lincoln H. S.,Tacoma, Wash.
TheLookout, Derby, Conn.
Maroon and White-Uniontown H. S., Uniontown, Pa.
The Micrometer-Ohio Mechanics Institute, Cincinnati,
Ohio.
The Missile-Petersburg H. S., Petersburg, Va.
The Nobleman-Noble and Greenough School, Boston,
Mass.
The Reflector-jackson High and Intermediate School,
Jackson, Mich.
The Review-Central H. S., Washington, D. C.
The Scribbler-Spartanburg H. S., Spartanburg, S. C.


Thc Sentinel-Dunbar Township H. S., Leisenring Pa.
The Spectator-Trenton H. S., Trenton, N. J.
The Stampede-Havre, Mont.
The Student-Holmes H. S., Covington, Ky.
The Student, Oklahoma H. S., Oklahoma City, Okla.
The Taj, Harrison burg, Va.
The Weekly Y psi Sem, Ypsilanti, Mich.
Westward Ho-Western H. S., Baltimore, Md.
TWyndonian-Windham H. S., \ 1Ihn, nrl., Conn.

OUR OPINION OF OTHERS.

Classicum-Ogden H. S., Ogden, Utah. Your school seems
to be very much alive. You have snappy society notes and
snappy sports and fine jokes. However, we think a few more
cartoons would improve your paper.
Sentinel-Dunbar Township H. S., Leisenring, Pa. Your
article, "Portrayal of the North American Indian in American
Literature," is splendid. Your exchange department is good,
too.
Lincolnian-Lincoln H. S., Tacoma, Wash. Why don't
you put all your jokes under one heading? Your poems are
very attractive.
Maroon and White-Uniontown H. S., Uniontown, Pa. We
certainly enjoy your paper. We like your literary and ex-
change departments especially.
Student-Oklahoma H. S., Oklahoma City, Okla. Your
paper is neatly and artistically arranged, but don't you think
pictures and cartoons would improve it?
W'yndonian-Wyndham H. S., Willimantic, Conn. Your
paper is very well balanced.


EXCHANGE HUMOR.


Harold.-"Why is a kiss over the telephone like
a straw hat?"
Harry.-"Because it isn't felt."-Maroon and
White.

Butcher.-"Come, John, break the bones in Mr.
Williams' chops and put Mr. Smith's ribs in the
basket."
John.-"All right, as soon as I finish sawing off
Mrs. Murphy's leg."


He (after popping the question)-"Why are
you crying, dearest? Did I offend you by my
proposal?"
She.-"Oh, no, dear; it's not that. I am crying
for pure joy. MI,'ther has always told me I was
such an idiot that I wouldn't get even a donkey
for a sweetheart, and now I've got one after all."

A certain sign said: "Don't go elsewhere to be
cheated; come in here."


0


: -~-~-~-


I1


I







lI.l ZONIAN.


foe Rubl.-"\\hy do there have knots on the
ocean instead of miles?"
Bob Little.-"Well, you see they couldn't have
the ocean tide if they didn't have knots."

Bob Pease.-"I culd kiss ou if e icr Li' nut in a
canoe."
Sh.--"Sir! Take me ashore imnncdiatrel\.


NOTICE-If you eat here once .ou will never
tat ans where else.

THE ROAD TO SUCCESS.

Early to bed, early to rise,
\Work like the dickens, and advertise.


A BRIGHT 'ISNNY DAY IN PANAMA.
./.' 5 ,-; B U r i,.,


'Twas a dark and stormy night;
The sun rose slowly out of l he ''*.r,
It rained all day that night;
And the moon was shining it's best.

The thunder was twinkling all around;
The stars falling thick and fast;
The wind was blowing straight up and down;
And the snow fell with a mighty blast.


ihe shore iw as ,..ash;ng over the waves:
"1 lie sea shells crying something terrific
The weather looked oun n i steady g'ze,
And the li-htmnne aas very pacific.

A rainbow came out, looking its bet,
As though to outdo them all.
The world srr.ihtened out and u .a once more
at rest,
And that %a.s- the end .f the squall.






THE ZONIAN. 49


Ruth Wilson, '20.


Our alumni column is growing so rapidly and each
person is doing such splendid things, that it would
take pages to give each full credit. Biut just
below are some interesting facts about some of our
interesting people.
Stewart McFarlane of '18 has wandered into
foreign fields and is studying hard in Edinburgh,
Scotland.
Miarairct Campbell, who graduated last year, is
attending school in Tallahassee, Fla, specializing
in languages. From all reports she is doing splen-
didly.
Hartman Stevens, who graduated in 1916, will
finish his 4 years in Rensselaer Polytechnic Insti-
tute in June. Besides being vice president of
his class, he holds several other important offices.
However, he finds time to belong to, and take an
active part in three fraternal organizations. After
he graduates, Hartman is going back to Rensse-
laer for a degree in electrical engineering.
Julia Nielsen, of last year's class, decided to
venture into the realms of matrimony, and was
married recently to Mr. L. Hartman.
Paul Warner, a 1915 graduate, is in Columbus,
Ohio, taking private lessons preparatory to enter-
ing Carnegie Institute in the fall.
We have the Fraser family well located, and from
reliable sources we find William, '14, in Tampico,
Mexico, with an oil company as a civil engineer.
Andrew, '15, is employed as a surveyor in the
Dredging Division hereon the Canal Zone. Janet,
who graduated last year, is in business college in
Brooklyn, N. Y., following a secretarial course.
Earl Palmer of the class of '19 is winning laurels
at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology.


Lucille Koperski, of last year's class, has taken
up kindergarten work at the Michigan State
Normal College, in Ypsilanti, Mich.
Joe Udry, '14, is with the Chevrolet Motor Car
Company in Flint Mich.
Gift Shady, 'I8, is following a commercial course
in a Colorado school.
Katherine Francis Farmer, '12, is a resident of
Bocas del Toro, Republic of Panama.
Roberts Carson, '18, is doing excellent work at
Annapolis, Md.,and holds the rank of midshipman.
Manuel Quintero, '19, is perusing law books at
Columbia University, New York City, with nota-
ble success.
Miriam Stevens Baumen, '14, is residing on
Colon Beach, C. Z.
One of the most interesting news items of the
year was the announcement of Dorothea West-
berg's engagement to Mr. Raymond Fitzpatrick.
Dorothea graduated with the class of '18. She is
to be an April bride.
The friends of Ethel Ruth Otis Page, '17, are
welcoming her back to the Zone where she is vis-
iting for a few short months.
The recent marriage of Phyllis Aline Kelly to
Mr. Lewis Worner was of general interest to
Zonites and others. Mr. and Mrs. Worner are
living in Ancon, C. Z.
Stephens Engleke, '18, a full-fledged farmer, is
experiencing the pangs of homesickness and will
return to the Zone in the fall.
Edward Green, '17, and Charles Davis, 'I8, have
decided to become engineers, and are following
that course at Washington State College.






THE ZONIAN.


The friends of Hubert Langlois, '19, will be
pleased to knJw that he is carrying off the highest
marks in his class at Villa Nova, Pa. Hubert is
studying to become an electro-chemist.
Branson Stevenson, 'i, is in Helena. Mont.,
working as a private secretary to his brother who
has the western agency for the Cole, Buick, and
other cars.
Rensselaer Polytechnic seemed to have a special
attraction for three members of the class of 'l 8.


George Winquist and Jack Wilcox are excelling
themselves in a mechanical course and Charles
Clarity is doing splendid work there.
Blossom Compton Bonitez, '14, is residing in
Cayey, Porto Rico.
Winnie Mae Stevenson, 'ri, was married in
Georgia to Mr. Chas. McCauley.






THE ZONIAN.


LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT OF THE CLASS OF '20.


\\'c, the Seniors of Balboa High School, being
of sound minds and of disposing temperaments,
do hereby make, publish, and declare this, our
last will and testament, hereby revoking all for-
mer wills, bequests, and devises of whatever
nature by us made.
First.-In view of the fact that the Class of '19
gave us the right and privilege of occupying the
desks in rows 7 and 8 in the assembly hall of
our beloved high school building, and further-
more, that they willed and bequeathed to us all
the dignity, reserve, and power b,:l.iL'irnL to a
senior class, together with its rare ability to dis-
cuss and decide questions of importance without
the usual quarrels and contentions, we, having
availed ourselves of aforesaid gifts and the same
still being in serviceable condition, do regretfully re-
linquish to the members of the Class of '21 said leg-
acies, trusting that they will be duly appreciated.
Second.-We, the Class of '20, do solemnly and
gn,-,criusl bequeath many of our numerous indi-
vidual virtues to the faculty and our less gifted
fellow students.
Our esteemed president, John Kuller, leaves his
unsullied reputation and pull to George Capwell,
hoping that he won't allow the same to deteriorate.
Susie Allen, Georgia Ellsworth and Helen Mil-
loy, having united in the cause of peace and quiet,
obligingly bequeath to Florinete Matter their de-
mureness and general calm, thereby showing them-
selves very willing to triple said young lady's
scant store of above-mentioned virtues.
Albert Thayer leaves to Gertrude John his ever-
increasing cyclopedia of society volubility, with
the injunction that she materially increase its pro-
duction in the coming year.
Willis Pressell, in view of the great .irL.-n, \ of
the occasion, wills his lovable disposition to Marie
.M:l Mllahn
Frances Thornton has willingly condescended
to leave her excessive tendency to avoirdupois to
Margaret Johnson.
Knowing that it will be well taken care of, Muro
Golden leaves his marked proclivity to .it
gathering to Mr. Boss, since it was so largely
developed at his expense.
Maria Hunsecker, in behalf of the school at
large leaves her remarkable musical ability to
Katherine Kaye.


Fowler Banton inflicts his curiosity upon Theo-
dore Knapp and we, the Seniors, zarnestKl hope
that he'll work it overtime as Fowler has done.
Frances Westberg leaves her natural capacity
for caging basket balls to Alicc Orr.
Anna Sire surrenders her strikingly original style
of locomotion to Esther Green.
Ruth Wilson resigns her quality of French ex-
pression to Marion Byrpe, confident that it will
prove advantageous.
Carla Smith rclinqJuishes her e\tr.iairdin.ar cir-
cumspection to Ethel Gctma;n.
Martha Zarak, feeling certain that all her dig-
nity and reserve will be appreciated if possessed
by Cecilia Twomey, hereby enacts said transition.
William Christian resigns his ability in athletics
to Charles Grobe.
Clara Wood presents Gertrude van Hardeveld
with her fine dramatic talent and pplendi. quality
of voice.
Lyle Womack entrusts to Lee Steele's care, his
celebrated :niiabilirt.
Upon Charles Seeley doth Harrt Grier bestow
his unlimited capacity of arguing volubility, for
use especially in the ,la-.rumli.
Mabel Lee, from the deprh of her benevolent
nature relinquishes her great abhorrence of no-
toriety to Margaret Halli'ii.
Warren Jordan fully intendrJ to leave his ego-
ism to some Junior but, upon investigation, has
decided that there is no need for it.
Always ready to give help where it is needed,
Jane Calvit grants her agility and athletic ten-
dency to \l.iy Duncan.
David Neville endows Edward Brady with his
famous golden smile.
Finally, Robert Getman dedicates the enviable
task of writing the Class Will of next year to the
unfortunate parag.. n of this year's Junior class.
Is W\rr'VEs WHEREOF, I have hereunto set my
hand and seal this eighth day of June, Anno
Domini nineteen hundred and twenty.
SIGNED AND SEALED: Robert Getman, by the
said Class of '20, as and for its last will and testa-
ment, in the presence of us, who, at its request,
in its presence, and in the presence of each other,
have hereunto subscribed our names as attesting
witnesses to said instrument,
[THEIR SEAL] -CLASS OF. 20. ...






THE ZONIAN.


V7


During a brawl in a Chicago resort an Irish-
man got poked in the eye with a stick, and he
immediately started proceedings against the
offender.
"Come now, said the magistrate, "You don't
really believe he meant to put your eye out?"
"No, I don't, said the Celt, "but I du believe he
tried to put it farther in."

"Well Si, What you gonna call your cow\?"
"Well, I calculate to call her 'America'."
"Better not, Si; she'd be apt to go dry."

"Who discovered America?"
"Ohio," replied the little girl.
"No, Columbus discovered America."
"Yes'm. Columbus was his first name."

"W'here do you like to skate best, Willie?"
"Near the danger sign."

"When I go to Heaven," said a woman to her
husband, "I'm guing to ask Shakespeare if he
wrote those plays."
"Suppose he isn't there," her husband replied.
"Then you ask him."

F'irg. worker---"Did you sing at the prison
to-day "
Se''ond rw or.ker-"Yes, but I wasn't appreciated,
for some reason."
First word'r--What did \ou sing?"
Second t'worker-"How Can I Leave Thee."


Mary had a little lamb,
Likewise a lobster stew,
And ere the sunlit morning dawned
She had the nightmare, too.
"Your picture isn't complete, old man. You've
got the horse in, but you haven't drawn the cart."
"Oh, I'm going to let the horse draw the cart."
Two small boys were discussing the merits of
their respective parents. The conversation had
reached a highly critical and personal stage.
"Well," remarked one, "You can say what you
please, but I reckon your father's about the mean-
est man that ever lived. Fancy his letting you
walk around in them old shoes and him a shoe-
maker."
"Huh!" remarked the other, "My father ain't
half so mean as yours. Why, fancy him being a
dentist and your baby only got one tooth!"
Sh/e-"How did you get insky?"
He--"With a latchkv."
"What is it that keeps the moon in place and
prevents it from falling?" asked Jim.
"I suppose it's the beams," returned his brother.
"Here, waiter! This steak is positively burned
black."
"Yes, sir. Mark of respect, sir. Our head cook
died yesterday."
Speaking of bathing in famous springs," said the
tramp to the tourist, "I bathed in the spring of
'86."


1


#..iS; ./. Gr/haiFa .'?







THE ZONIAN.


Lady, (shopping): "How much are these chick-
ens, please?"
Storekeeper: "A dollar and a half."
"And did you raise them yourself?"
"Yes, mam. Yesterday they were only a dollar
and a quarter."

"I fear that the young man to whom I gave a
job in the shop last week is dishonest."
"You should not judge by appearances."
"I'm judging by disappearances in this case."

Erpl'i:yeiir: "You look robust. Are you equal
to the task of sawing wood?"
Bolshevik: "Equal isn't the word. I'm superior
to it. Good-by."

Mistress-"Cook the dinneron the patent petrol
stove to-day, Maria."
Maria-"Well, I began to, mum, but the stove
went out."
Mistress-"Light it again then."
Maria-"Yes,mum, but it's not come back yet;
it went out "hrniLuh the roof."

An aviator tells this true story of his training
in a southern camp during the war. He and a
comrade were sent on a rather long trip in a
dirigible as a part of their training, and while they
were in the air they became confused and lost
their way. Accordingly, theydescendeduntil they
could see a laborer at work just below them.
Shutting off the engine, they waited until they
were in hailing distance and'called out, "I say,
where are we?"
"You can't fool me. You're up in that there
balloon," was the unexpected reply.

"What time is it? I'm invited to a party and
my watch ain't going."
"What's the matter? Ain't your watch
invited ?"

\\'hat do you think of the two candidates?"
"Well, the more I think of them the more
pleased I am that only one of them can
be elected."

i) uncle has been elected mayor.".
"Honr;stly ?"
"Oh! that don't matter."


Fatal Effect.-"Yesterday afternoon, he read
his copy of The Eagle. Three hours later he
died."
-From an obituary in the Brooklyn Eagle.

A poor man had hardly been able to supply
his wife and family with the necessaries of life
until one day he struck it rich.
"At last, my dear," he said to his wife, "you
will be able to buy yourself some decent clothes."
"I'll do nothing of the kind," she said, "I'll
get the same kind the other women wear."

Briggs- "Did you know McCulloch had an
artistic talent?"
Brown --"No!"
Briggs--"Why yesterday he drew a picture of
a rabbit on his father's bald head and everyone
thought it was a hair."

Sunday School teacher-"Johnny, can you tell
me who built the ark?"
7ohnny- Na ."
Sunday School teacher-"Correct."

A young soldier lay wounded in a hospital in
France. A nurse said: "My lad, give me your
name so I can tell your mother."
Young soldier-''". mother knows my name.

First Waiter--"I wish I was a weighing machine.
Second Waiter-"Why?"
First Waiter-"Everybody tips the scales."

Teacher-"I'm good looking." Whar tense is
that?"
Student-"Past."

"I don't feel well this morning."
"Where do you feel the worst?"
"In school."

Sergeant-"What's the matter with you guys?
Keep your eyes off the ground. Don't watch
your feet. They're big enough to take care of
themselves."
Private-"I'm gonna brain that guy when
drill's over."
Second Private-"Huh! you're gonnaget in line
an' wait for your turn!"







THE ZONIAN.


Grnggs -"\'When I don't catch the name of a
person I've been introduced to, I ask if its spelled
wirh an 'e' or an 'i'. It general% works, too."
Briggs-"I used to try that dodge myself until
I Was: introduced to a young lady at a party.
When 1 put the question about the 'e' or 'i' she
flushed angrily and wouldn't speak the whole
evening."
"W'hat was her name?"
"I found out later it was -- Hill."

A lady knitted a pair of socks and sent her
address with the socks to France. The soldier
u ho received the stcks t rote to the lady as follows:
The socks received, they almost fit.
I wear one for a helmet and one for a mit.
I hope to meet you when I've done my bit,
But where in -- did you learn to knit?

First Pup:- -"If it's heids, we go to bed. If
it's tails, we stay up."
Second Pupil-"Yeh, ahd if it stands on edge,
we stud'."


Little Willie, who had just been to see a football
game, shocked his mother by praying as follows;
"God bless mother.
God bless father,
God bless sister.
Rah-Rah-Rah!"

P.pil-"Does "post-mortem" mean examina-
tion after death?"
Teather-"Yes."
Pupil-"Well, if you don't mind, I'll take the
rest of mine like that."

"I think I'm quite a musician."
"Yes, you ought to be with Wagner."
"Why, he's dead."
"I know it."

All those who think our Jokes are poor
Would straightway change their views
Could they compare the ones we print
With those that we refuse.





THE ZONIAN. 55


H We Specialize in Mlen's Clothes
READY MADE -:- SEMI-READY -:- MADE TO ORDER
All Kinds of Haberdashery
^ PALAIS ROYAL J. S. Pereira, Prop.
Corner Central Avenue and Ninth Street, Panama




The Panama Coca-Cola Bottling Co., Inc.

Imnpnrlers. Exporters, Jobbers, Wholesale Commission Mferchants

Ginger Mineral
AND BOTTLERS OF
Ale Water

SSoda oca- 0ola Hires Root
Water .....Beer
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Bottled from Pure Polar Aerated Distilled Water

PANAMA Phone 65 and COLON Phone 84



PA3AkMLA HARDWARE
M. D. CARDOZE
Two Stores, Cathedral Plaza, and 125 Central Avenue, Panama City
Ileadquarters for
ELECTRIC HEATING DEVICES, ARMS AND AMMUNITION, PAINTS AND ENAMELS
GENERAL HARDWARE






56 THE ZONIAN.





g When You Want

A TRACK SHIRT, A PAIR OF RUNNING PANTS
A BATHING SUIT
or In fact. anything in HNIT ATHLETIC WEAR. ask your dealer for

THE HYGIENIC GOODS

Made by

The Hygiene Fleeced Underwear Co.
PHILADELPHIA, PA.

M AM9nM .M 1 M,1 -11 :6 "MMMMMxxMM=tI01 .nk .X-1


SWhen in Panana
DO NOT FAIL TO CALL AT


The Frenfcn Bazaar m

S Large Department Store


Headquarters for o
Parisian Novelties

PANAMA COLON PARS
3MEaa ^
I li


S PE.\K I .IG OF
Photographs!

i ,, L you ant nne that is A.ristir. ric-,s you d-
I rc]e it. and k ii .. the Be' )uaLI t!\ _

SEE - -
ENDARA
The High School Seniors recommend
his work.


LOCATION
Convenient Accessible
Near Cable Office on
Central Avenue Phone 386 M
^ Nl~~~9~6~f~~~s%~~~f~





THE ZONIAN.


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5S THE ZONIAN.





Bastian Brothers Co.

MANUFACTURERS OF
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('Com mniecement Announcemnents

and Invitations, Calling( Cards..


356 BASTIAN BUILDING ROCHESTER, N. Y.





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THE ZONIAN.


THE UNIVERSAL CAR
A Car that a Lady can drive
STHE NEW ELECTRIC STARTER

Ford Touring Car
PRICE $735 plus freight to CANAL, ARMY, NAVY MEN.

CO Smallwood Brothers
COLON DEALERS PANAMA



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Sold by
Smallwood Brothers
COLON AGENTS UNITED STATES RUBBER CO. PANAMA






THE ZONIAN.


PEION 784

Dr. Vernon Crosbie
Surgeon-Dentist





Lbsd bt U'ncle Sam's Expert Riflemen

HOPPE E' S INitro Powdeer
ISolvent No. 9



SA compound that will remove the residue of any high power powder, in-
cluding black powder. It will eliminate rusting and pitting in any
climate.
This compound will neutralize any residue and loosen metal fouling and
-leading that may be left in barrel after cleaning.
...._ No. 9 is the only rifle cleaning solvent that will remove rust, metal
K'T P fouling, and leading.
J uiiNo riflemen or quartermaster's department should be without it.
W Solad by Hardware and Sporting Goods Dealers and at Post Exchanges
" t lean Frank A. Hoppe, Sole Manulacturer
S ""2314 N. 8th STREET PHILADELPHIA




THE ROBBINS COMPANY
S- TTLEBORO, MASS. -

Medals Trophy Plaques Prize Cups
School Jewelry Military Insignia Class Rings and Pins
SConvention Badges Advertising IN
NOVEL TIES
M M W W M MM3E> M E M EBOR M ASS. ______






IHE ZONIAN.


PHONE 1031 PANAMA P. O. BOX 55, ANCON, C. Z.


BOWDRY
DESIGNERS
S/ I i "The Busiest Store on the Isthmus"

Si R"ICAN MIL'LINRY andn
DRESS PARIORS
1I | \ -- IMPORTERS --



IYour name here)
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Opposite Ancon Post Office No. 1-3 Calle 4 de Julio Panama


STATIONERY i

ENORMOUS STOCK, LOWEST PRICES,
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Our popular trade mark specialties:
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Correspondence with Merchants, Impor-
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THE AMERICAN NEWS
COMPANY, INC.
Nos. 9-11-13-15 Park Place New York City
N Ne4~~s 'biP'^^Sts^h e s e e


g a


QUALITY


Jewelers





Central Ave. and Opposite
8th Street Commissary H
PANAMA COLON
Sjewelers N





62 THE ZONIAN.




S CABARET "CIRO" i
PANAMA'S FINEST CABARET

An attractive, up-to-dateCabaret where
clean people can enjoy clean entertain-
nient furnislhed Ih a group of the most
Talent nt tertainers ever heard on the
1 Isthmus. Hi h1, Class Artistsand
-t prompt service. .









taken of anything at any time and anywhere

.'e Sepecialize in -uality Po*rtraits


THE PICARINE STUDIO

109 CENTRAL AVENUE PANAMA CITY
S* Wke Specicailize in Quality Portraits
^ S2
*2---------- *2
*2 i
3N *2
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THE ZONIAN. 63



SDUQUE COMPANY INC.

HARDWARE LUMBER ARMS
AMMUNITION FISHING TACKLE

SOLE AGENTS FOR DEVOE & REYNOLDS Co., Inc., PAINTS AND BRUSHES







LA MASCOT


A large Assortment of "NENVERBREAK" TRUNKS in
Wardrobe, Nurses' LocKers, Army LocKers, and Cabin
Trunks, also Fabrihoid and Leather Suit Cases, Bags, etc.,
Sat moderate prices. .


SC. W. MULLER
37 Central Avenue Panama







T HE students of the high school wish to express their gratitude
and appreciation to Mr. J. C. Searcy and the Universal Film Ex-
change for the two films that they donated to aid the vaudeville
performances which were given by the students for the purpose of
raising money for this paper.







64 THE ZONIAN.


















m

We appreciate to the fullest extent the help
given by States' and local advertisers in mak-
ing this issue of "The Zonian" a financial suc-
cess and bespeak for them the patronage of
our many friends.
BUSINESS MANAGER.


EMMEMMMMWWWMMMWMMEMMMEMEMMMWWi

















ii




Full Text

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1920 t The' Zoniali --'l lf2!l20 .... '.

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"jxltle" Batteri es are powerful. dependabl e and truly sen'iceable every mont h in the year. "lExtbe" Batteri es do not expl oit any particular fad or fancy in storage battery desi g n They embody the matured and tc::-{cd knO\dedge and experience of the world's largest maker of storage batteri es. \\"h el1 you put an H:!Ext"e" Battery behind your starting and lighting system, YOLI elimina t e "gu esswork" frol11 its most ,"ital feature-the power supply Battery Service i s completel y equipped, a nd that means in C'"Cry detail, to care for the needs of c,-e r y rnake of startin g batlc r y. I t pro," idcs for the testi ng. repai r in g and rccJ:ar gin g of your battery. regardle
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THE ZONIAN BlfJilltSJ A/mlllg"r Joke Edil or Athletic Edi/or ( 80y/) nlhlelie Edilor ( Girl!') ZOOIan Staff Edito rial Gr:l d u:lt cs Facu lt y : \in't I t the Truth? Why We Stay. For .'\ That B alboa Revelation Ont: Girl's War Un Oi:t en cl Canal BALBOA, ______________ PUBLISHED BY THE BALBO : \ HI G H SC H OOL. Ionian .taff. WII-US R. PRESSELL JORDAN Cirrtlltllioll Editor R O BERT )1/11111111 EdItor D A \ 'ID ;\EVILl.F_ SOliel)' Editor FRANCE!) \\'E.!)TBEII,C Exchange EdllOI CO:,\TE:,\TS. Pink H :l.Ildkerchhds \\'ILLI S R. PRES\LL T ommy's Storr T he Pie ;\ 1"R1E ;\lAci\IAHO:-' CECILIA TWOMEY RUTH WILSON CARLA SMITH RUTH \Va.SON 16 Gaillard Cur Class P rophec)' 18 Green Stockings 9 Col on Soc iety 23 A thletics 24 Girls' Athletics Exchanges FRANCES THOItNTON R lJT H \\'ILSO:-.' Suu;: ALLEN ;\iARI A H L'NSEC ... ER AXITA CECII.E LEAR HERBERT SUSI E AI.I.EN DAVID :--.'EVII.I.E FRANCES \\'ESTBERG I-IU:O;SECKER 3' 33 34 35 3 6 39 Balboa Dry D ock and Shops Wh en A Feller Quarter, GEORGE E xc h.lIl ge Humor A BrightSunn\' P .lIlama, AI.8ERT S. Alu mni I hrTH WII.'IO:>O Cla ss W ill GERTRUDE ..... :>0 HARDE\'EI.D E1 l'olatrimonio O esgrac1ado l'otARIA HUS'<.,EC .... ER L es lies de P t!rles WEST8ERr. 30 31 .1' J okes 5 1

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T H E ZO:,\ I A:,\. EDITDRIAL E DUCATION. Did you ever con nect speculation with education? P r obabl y not. Nearly everyone at sometim e o r other has had a desire to speculate. \Ye believe, h owever, that t here is no speculation when a person inves t s h eavily in an education, (or it is a sure thing. Peopl e or h ig h -sc h oo l age do not look at the acquirement of an edu cation in the light of an investment. But it is, just a s much as though o n e h ad bough t cotton, oil, or gold stock. The average person's career i s d ec ided by the way h e invests b etween t h e ages of f o urtee n t o eighteen. T h e o n e who stops sc h ool at the e n d o r the eighth grade and takes a p osition w h ere the immediate d ividends are greate r c h ooses a ve n[Ur e where the dividends will not vary to any great extent f o r the rest of h is life; but h e, w h o invests heavily in t h e knowl edge marke t and takes all that is offe red, will find t hat in a short tim e the proceeds o f this investment, will far surpass those realized by the o n e who passed up educatio n for t h e investment which s h owed immediate r t' turns. True, some will s a y that t ht' greatest m en in our his tory and somt' o f the big busint'ss m e n of to-da), had nothing m o re t h an a country sc h oo l edu cation. But, WI.:' ask ),ou, h o w o f these men who did not havt:: tht' opportunity to ca rr y their tducation further than the country sch ool let it go at that' You will find that all or them who did not actually go to c h oo l past the "ighth made some p rivate speculation in Prefe rre d K now l edge" on t h ei r own h oo k a n d t h e reby won Oll t. Our own A braham L i n co l n is as good all exampl e of t hi s as we have. Du e to n ecess ity, hi s sc h ooling was sadly neg lected. H e was n,o r ic her t h a n t h e most humbl e p e r son w h o reads t h ese l in es but h e saw that "Gray Matter Stock, i s a lways a good deal above par. H e had n o on.e to offer him t h e oppor tunities whic h t h e poorest n ow possesses A s t h e educational mark e t w as rath e r low i n K e ntucky, h e played t h e Bear a n d made a good i n vestment in uGen e r a l Knowl e d ge." Everyone k nows t h e resul t. Some w ill say t hat t h e b ig m e n w h o had a meager start w e re l uc k y, or we r e gifted with geni u s. Edi son says, cCGeniu s i s '2 pe r ce n t ge niu s and 98 pe r ce n t h a r d wo r k. A.nd so m e a nonymou s author says: T h e men the:: w orld cal l s luck)'. will te l l y o u, o ne, That s ucce::ss comes not wi s h ing, but by hard work, bravel y dOIlt:." The men w h o stopped sc h oo l at all early age and studied later by themsel ves and amounted to so m e t h ing, did not take t hat method from c h o i ce but b ec a u se t h e financial condi tio n of t heir fam i l ies wa s sllc h t h a t it wa s n ecessary. So, f ellow stu d e n ts o f to-day, w h y forego t h e excdlent opportunities o ff e red by t h e sc h ools unless it is a fina ncia l n ecessity? The larg e majority of t h e students w h o stop sc h ool at t h e e n d o r t h e grades, d o n o t do i t be caus" or necessity, but becallse t h e immedi a t

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THE ZO NIAN. r eturns o f it p os iti o n l oo k big t o them. : \ hig building i s n o g ood with out a so lid f o undati o n ; n eithe r i s a big bus in ess p oss ibl e without a solid f oundatio n The sane edu catio n and sOlln d prin c iples o f the vario u s m embe r s o f that bu s in':!3s what make it solid There i s n o w a large a n:! w onJe rfu l fieU op"n f o r rightthinkin g m e n an d w o m e n :\Tow i s t h e tim e ro ge t a g e n e r o lls e du c ati o n L)Ok a t the conditio n o f the w orld to-day) war, desolation, and B o l s hevism. A p eriod o f n ::col1-/ struc ti o n i s com i n g. The coun tr), w ill n eed r eliable, w ell-trained peopl e f o r this recon structi o n. (f w e are t o b e the o n es t o do it l e t u s ge t the proper educati o n tha t w e nny do i t rig h t. \Vh a t a fe y o u go in g t o c h oose? A re y o u goin g to t a k e the opp ortunity o f se r v in g your count r y and yourself b y g ettin5 a solid f ounJ a ti o n for anyt hin g may b e c alled o n t o do, o r are you g oing to b e o n e o f the "wise guys" wh o ris k s entering o n hi s l i f e s w ork w i t h out t h e pro p e r edu catio n ? \\'ILLIS R PRESSEI.L ''10, Edi t or

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Georgia J ohn Kuller li' rauces'I hflrrlloll {'nrln Smit h -J :r: /,

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Characterislh Speciall)' Favorite expression Amhilioll THE Z O;,\lAN. JOHN KUL.LER \\"II .. I.IS PRESSEL!.. \ Yisdom B :l :t-h!" T o be :l chemi s t CharaCleristic Speciall)' FflU O,.;le c).prcssiol1 Ambi;i()l1 GEORGIA ELLSWORTH CIJflraCleriJlic Speciall)' Fa v orite expression ,1mbili0l1 Quietness Anything new "Oh, darn it!" T o attend business college F ickleness The nearest girl T o get his dipl oma FRAl\CES THORNTON C.4RLA SMITH Characteristic Speciall)' Fflu or;,c (xpreUiol1 Ambition J ollity Star gazing F or the IO"e of j \ l ike!" ,', T o be a \\'ashingwn belle Charl/cleri!llC Spuin/I)' Favorite expression Ambition \Vh o l esomeness D eclamations It's sort of-!" T o be a l awyer -!

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.Ja nf' ral v L William Christi t'l. A laria Jlullbcckcr L y l e W e m.}('x. Rut'> W il,on o % %

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THE lO. T A N 9 V hLLI A M CHRI STIAN Characleri;lie Speciat,-,. Favo r ite expreJJiOl1 Ambit ion Chi,'alrr Athbi cs ,"L isten h e r e!" T o be a de n t ist Charae t(r;;ti, Spuia/t)' FarJont( (xp,.eJJiOl1 .fmbitio11 MAltl A HUNSECKER Spuia/t)' Fat'or;1r expreJJion Ambition MR 72571 2 I mpertinence "You po-or nut!" T o marry an It alian tenor L YLE W OMACK Charaeteri;th Speciahy M an l iness H unting ":\w.w.\v.!" Favo r ile expre;s;ot/ A m bition T o b e a sc i entific far mer Sweet ness T yping for Mr. B oss Honestlr?" T o be a p hysical directress Ch"rac l (rislic Far:orit( exprtJJion ,.fmbilion RUTH WILSON D ign i ty L a n guages "Oh dead" T o t r avel ____

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Fowler Danto n M arthu Zarak. David Nevill .. 1-1 -o I I I -l ::r: 1tr1 N 1 0 I /, /,

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THE 20'\1.\'\. FOWU:R Charncle riflic Self conf1den:::e Cltm"fl(/triJlic Fixing: ?, the bell F(l['orilr (.'(prnsiml "Great cars!" T o be a structural engineer .. lmbiliOIl ;\ 1 ARTHA Z.UAK Chal"acttrt,flt{ -\mlability CllflrrlcltrtJric Speciall)' F o r mul::ts in chemiq-\ {{lUI"II." F ar;o,.,ft rxprUJ;Ql1 eyer been he:tr.\ Ftl:wiu t\pru.<'Q1J .1mb it ioll T o he;l II.H::teriologi!>t 1mbilioll Thoroug h ness hall 'I'll be darned!" T o be .1 teacher o f la n g u ages Inlt;:uin P rocrastinatio n Qune so! Qui te 50'" T o live in t h e bus h II

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Albert Thaye r Mabel Lee. G e tman Annl Sir e Warrell Jordan. .''''

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THE ANNA SIRE Characteristic Jerkiness Sprci'llly DodgIng the que.!.tion Fat'ori/( (xprtSJ.QII I can't go! J' \'e got a date." ."mDi/iOIl .T 0 be :1 school teacher ClltlrflCferislic ,Spte iull)' Fa'Jonlt rxprusioll .7mln/;011 ALBERT THA\'ER Characltris lic. Specialty FaIJorite txprtuion ."m llition Chardc(eristl( Specialt), Faoorite (xprruioll .--I111bi/ioll. Censored H aw.",-w!" . T o be a millionairt: ).latdenliness Studying "Oh, girls!" .To go to college CllflrtlCluislic Spuia/I), FflIJO,.;te txpr(Ssiol1 .11110i1101l Sociabi litr (?) .;\ lai denly reserve Unheard Business life Egutism Running Her! Get to work!" T o attend Annapolis 1 3

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M lIr o Goldell. C'l n r a W o o d H e len Milloy. Harry Grier. HlIl:Ii c Allen. -

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T H E ZO:\I A i':. CU.RA \\"000 HARIO' GRIr:.R ChartUI{'r'J/I( Speciall)" Fatlo r i", (XpraHOIl Ambition .Boy.:> !!'S humble!" To get mar:-ic:J .-Imb!liOIl ;\IL'RO Chm'tUI{'r;;I;c Clz.,I'(UltnsIU .-"pt,ia''-l' FmJori/( nprt'uioll .imlll/hm HI:.I.x \\-illlllgnc:s s .Finding: mistakes in houkkcering Favoritt' o;puuio1l "Oh, lamb!" .lmb;I;01l T o be:: ;t kinJc:rgartt!1l tcadlcr Sarcasm oisc and more of It !!! Sucl.:e<.:s and mone\' Clwr.Uh'nsl[c. FIII.!onft'i!\'plt!SJIOII .1mb,JitJlI \'olubtllty Vamping "BU(, \lIss Gallup -?" To be:1 Demureness "Caramh,I!" 1 5

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16 THE ZONIAN. lJ1aruUy. A. R LAKG, Supe rintendent. A. B. Tebraska Wesleyan University. :\. t\1., niversity of :-Iebraska. BERNARD L. Boss, Principal. Graduate w ork at Oshkosh, Wisconsin State Normal Sc h oo l. Ph. B., niver sity of \V isconsin. Graduate Work University o f W isconsin S c:etlce. MYRTIS M GALLUP. A. B ., Michigan State N ormal C ollege. A. M., C olumbia University. Eng l i sh. OLGA J FROST. A. B. Mt. St. Vincent-a n -Hudson. French and Sponisll. ALBERTA R. CRE S PI. A. B., Smith C o llege. NlallulIlol ; c s. EDNA H EALY HOWARD. A. B ., University of Minnesota. S cience and H iSlor)". E STELLE R. t\IcKELVEY. A. B., U niv e rsity o f i Vlinn esota. Lat in and English. LEONA M. ARMSTRONG. B. S. Drake U niversity. Spanish. EDNA L. V. RAER. A. B., niven;it y of \\'i sco nsin. Sheboygan Bus in ess College. Gregg School. Comm ercial Subjects. CHARLOllE GUGENHA". B. S. Kansas State Agricultural College. H ouseh o ld drlS. WALLACE LEE. Wooster College. A1anual T raining. i\\. D. :-IICHOL". Northwestern University. l \1izuic.

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THE 20:\ IA:\. 17 ) A I;-.J'T I T THE TRUTH? Eli za b eth was strai ghthair ed fr eck l ed faced and snub-nosed All these t hin gs were reflected vcr)' plainly in the g la ss b e f o re which s h e s at, h e r chin in her hands and a very preocc u p ied e xpre ss ion on h er face. S h e heaved a grea t s i g h a s s h e t h ought o f life's unfairness H ere s h e "'as. J u s t lo o k at her. W as it h e r fault t hat h e r hair wasn't c url y? Could s h e h e lp it b eca u se s h e ha d freckl es ? Had s h e ha d anything t o sav about what kind o f a no se s h e was to have? No, decidedly n ot. L if e certainly was unfair. just l oo k at R ose l\1ay. She wa s n't freckled n o r snub-nosed nor straight-haired nor anythin g. \\'hy did God give h e r two l ove l ydirnp l es, and l o n g golde n curls? S h e was n 't quite sure thou g h that these last were a gift o f G od, but e\'(;:11 if ther w e r e n't natural, t hey were curls \Y ell, it was toO muc h f o r h er. S h e eouldn 'r understa nd. N ow this was n 't t h e firs t tim e J\l ary Elizabet h had r e a so n e d this o ut b efore her mirror, but to-day s h e had f ound something whic h made her wish mor e than eve r f or th e personal c harm s s h e rli dn'[ po ssess. Sh e had f ound a note written t o R ose M ay. I r read as f ollo w s : MR12Sil-j ---i; D ere R ose i\l:tr i luv rou, do you luv me? i Ihillk rou are pretty. our sweetheart H arry." ;-.Jo w, of course, i\I a r y Eli za beth kn e w that R ose so m etimes receiveti t his kind o f not e, but th e thing that made h e r so th oughtful wa s the name signed at t h e b ottom. H arry was the littl e b o)' s h e 'speciall y admired, although h e didn't kn o w it. Wh y could n't R ose 1\lay leav e him alone? \\'h)' woul dn't s h e b e co nt ent with the oth ers? Of course 1\[ar y Eli zabeth unde rstood that it wou l d be imprac ti ca l to appeal to R ose 1\1<1)'. She mus t think up so m e ot her plan. mind was s till unmad e whe n s h e went to bed. That night s h e dreamed o f a pi cnic The picnickers were the c hildren o f + 8 and they were spendin g t heir halfh oliday in th e n ear-by g rove. 1\[ os t of th e c hildren co uld b e see n v e r y plainly but in t h e for eground wa s R ose l\Iay, her curls blow ing in t h e breeze and n o t v ery far b ehind her, was H arry J list b e f o r e they w e nt h o m e, a s torm ca m e up, and o h h ow it thun dered! Th e child:-en w ere wet-h ere s h e aw o k e, her dream unfini s h ed She sat u p in b ed and sai d in an awed

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18 THE ZON IAN. whisper, "Why, that's an omen, T do believe. Wha t else could it be? Aren't we having a picnic Fridar afternoon in the grove, and didn't I hear Har,,' ask R ose i\[ay if s he'd stay with him? Huh! just as if he'd want h er if h e saw her at night after her mother had put her hair up in curls \\'ell, my problem is all worked out, and all I have to do is to pray for rain." '.\,ith this she rolled over and sank once more in lumber. In spite of M ary Elizabeth's f ervent prayers the next day dawned bright and clear. At the breakfast table s h e anxiously inquir ed, D o yo u think it will rain, Daddy?" "No, chi ld, don't worr)" nothing will happe n to spoil your day. Take your lunch and run off So with a heavy heart i\[ary Elizabeth set off The chi l dren were to come in as u s ual in the morning and as soon as the noon bell rang, were to go to the grove where they would eat their lunch and spend the r est of the afternoon Noon. And no rain! \ Vhat was th e matte r ? Hadn't God h ea r d h e r prayers! W e ll, so mething was wrong somewh ere, but s h e couldn't see where Anyway it wasn't raining and what's mOfe it d idn't l ook th e least bit lik e rain. 1ary Elizabeth was disappointed. Somehow she hadn't counted o n its not raining Sh e had counted her chickens before the y were hatched and now her eggs were all broken. "Well," she sighed, Hit wont rain any quicker by my sittin g h ere. I might just as well make the best of a bad bargain." Wh en they reached the grove s h e played around with her companio n s, all the while r ebe llin g at the thought o f having to give up h e r nice plan just because of a little rain, or to be accurate the Jack o f a littl e rain Here she got up and walked toward th e grove alone, absorbed in though t and not n otic ing where s h e was going Suddenly she h ea rd vo i ces, and lo ok ing up, saw she had taken the path to the c reek. Sh e stopped and listened, then when she r ecog nized th e voices, h e r face lit up and s h e excla im ed, Well, if that isn't lu ck! R ose May and Harry and at th e creek of all p l a ces Now I know why it hasn't rai n ed. Of co ur se I couldn't expect that G o d wou l d do eve r y thing, furnishing th e rain and all. Anyway, God only helps those who help th e ms e lves,"she had h ea rd that a long tim e ago. Well, here's where s h e'd prove it. She walked up t o them, saying, Why, hello there! What are you doing away up here?" B y this time s h e was right back o f R ose May, when, to appearances, s h e s lipp ed and to save h e r self from falling, s h e naturally made a d es p erate grab for the n ea r es t o bj ec t, which jus t happ ened t o b e R ose May, who then went h ead l o n g into the s hallow creek. She came up gasping for breath and sputtering angrily," Oh, you m ea n thing, you! I just know you did t hat all purpose. J u s t look at m e n o w. I'm all wet." Sh e ce rtainl y wa s a s ight to b e h old-water dripping from h e r hair, no long e r curly; water drip ping from her nose and chin, and water dripping from her now mud-colored dress She surely wasn't an object for admiration, and Harry was quick to note this fact. H e sa id hurri ed l y, "Say, th ere's T o m whistling f o r me. J gottago." Then turning to Mary Elizabeth, asked, Going back?" Mary Eli za b e th nodded h e r head happily and said, "Sure. WHY WE STAY. CUt/i" Tuom)'. '22. I've been down here in P anama So "dog-gone" many That when I think of the things I've missed at home, It fills my eyes with te3rC). B ut when I think o f the free z ing cold, And t he price of coa l. and the "flu," I'm so "dog-gone" glad I'm in P anama I don't know wh2! do do.

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THE ZONIAN. 19 r FOR A' THAT. David Ne v ill!!, '20. '@ H e stood on th e afte rdeck, and watch ed the cold pil e of spire and tow e r and buttr ess fad e int o t h e so ft e ning d i s tance, and a great r elie f flowed over him. H i s \V at erlooj h e a failure. H e had ha d a business cour se in college and the n 3 y ears in t h e confu s ing s wir l o f t h e city maddening to him w h o ha d always b ee n as naturall y a part o f th e jun g l e wilds as th e ocelot and th e h ye na In g rain ed l y ina ccurate" they c all ed him Hca re_ l ess, h eedless." "Plain dumb"-his ow n explana t i on. But it was hard-Th ree yea r s H e drea med of the m, those l o n g lin es of figures figures t h at would lie Bu t h e was l e aving it. H e was goi n g back Home--! The word t hrill ed h im. I t meant cool m or nin gs, misty valleys, green, shady streams, t h e roar of br e ak ers and t h e swi s h o f palms in the ni ght wind. It m eant a fres h o pp ort unity. H e had n ever b ee n fitt ed f o r t hat oth er t h i n g H e would go to his people first. H e would s h ow t h em that h e kne w h e o w ed t h e m -much. H e would give the m what h e h ad, and the n h e would go and l ose him self in th e un exp l o r ed vast n ess. H e cou l d co nqu e r that, co uld s ati s f y his desires! I t wa s far e a sier to master the j ungl e than th ose man mad e m azes of co n ve nti on, c riti cis m a n d prej u dice. New t h o u g ht s flooded his min d anJ h e strai g h tened, and t h e memory and b r ooding of 3 bitter years fell from him lik e a cloak. His min d l eaped f orwa rd and wit h softe n ed fac e and te n der eyes h e v i s uali zed it th at boy h ood land o f l o ng ago. I t::. beautiful glades of velvet green I n little nooks along thestream, whose va riati o n s a jungl e lover w o uld s p e nd a life time searc h ing Ollt, w h ose b ea ut)' w ould hus h the poet's voi ce to it s so ft es t qual i ty. H e l ea n ed o n the rail, face in arms and l e t his e m otio n s sweep avel h im lik e a w arm and gentle tropi c storm. It was d r y season but still th e riv e r h urtled s wiftl y downward. I t i s a beautiful strea m s preading a swift s u ccess i on o f po o l and rapid a n d s hall ow a n d gravell y stre t c h a n d c anyon-canyo ns w h e r e the river so metimes narrow s to 4 0 fe e t wit h bla c k wall s tow e rin g a hundred f ee t above where the r iver roar s and l e ap s and tear s as th o ugh e nrag ed at s u c h cl ose confin e m e nt; and t h e n, as t h o u g h tired and p enite n t o f i ts hars h t emper, run s silent and deep f o r a stretc h b e n ea t h th e i n t ertwining bran c h es o f huge trees that grow out of a veritable garden o f f e rn and lily and palm o n th e banks and s upport o r c hid s and trailing ferns and myriads of jungle life, w h o raise, at d iff e rent times in the day, th eir own p ec uliar pcean s of thanks giving to t h e s k y Trul l' thi s i s th e promi sed l a n d, and will b e un til m odern man se t s his d es tru ctive foo t in it s b ea uty, and und e r his blightin g breath the trees, t h e pla yg r ounds and th e h o m es o f th e tree f o lk will cras h to the ground, crus hin g under the m t h e park s of other d w elle r s o f t h e jungle and t h e bedlam of c ivili z ati o n wit h all it s smoke and gri m e will p o llut e it s limpjd streams a n d wreck its p e ac e and b eauty An d why? T hat a hundred million m o re humans ma y liv e and m ove an d h av e th e ir being in all th e ir s w eaty, uncomfortable, di sco nt ented, nerve-ra c k ing e n vironment wit h curses o n th ei r lip s a n d p ollution in t h e i r h e art s as w ell a s o n th eir b o dies "Whe r e every prospect pleases And only man i s vil e," A boat c r ept s l owly up the river, t h e 2 m e n in h e r an ins pirati onal and romanti c to u c h to a wildly b ea utiful picture. M ore hardy t hey see m ed t h an o th e r me n god lik e in th e ir supr e m e selfr e lian ce and al though th e i r pul ses and muscles t hr obbed unde r th e s train, yet t h e ir hearts su rg ed a n d exulted at every t h ru s t of th e long p oles. For th eirs was master y, t hat goa l toward whi c h ever y hum an h eart lon gs un ce a s ingl y. The ir b odies swayed rhythmi c ally and the clink cla nk clink clank rang wit h mech anica l r egularity as the steel -s h o d poles gripped t h e stony bottom.

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20 THE ZO:\IA:\. L 'p Q \er rap iJs and low falls o nly requiring that the l ow prow ridt" Q \ 'e;:f the sla nt ahead, and the back o f t h e r i se be Aat e n o u g h that all the weight s hall n o t fall on the middle o f the cayuco when the crest i s crossed, si nkin g the low sides beneath the surface. Of course there i s a lways danger fro m the tur bulent might o f t h e torrent and the r e a r e a lwa ys instantaneo u s j udgment deci s i o n s to be mad e The n the tw o mu s t always se n se the move o f th e other bef ore i t i s made, Illust b oth ins tin::t ive l y know th e same thing to b e the right thin g. F or a conflict o f wills gives the c \ 'erwaitin g curre n t its opportunity and YOLI go rus hing b ack d own wit h o ut a c han ce [Q s trai g hten ou t the b o at o r c h oose a course-a s nag o r a j utting rock broadsid e the L,oat. o r a bre aking r est, o r a s udd e n drop and your voyage I S over. The '2 men in t h e cayllco w o rked p e rfectl y t o gether. On e brown, s h ort, stoc ky) I n dian-featured; the oth e r white, tall, s l ender, except s h o ulders and arms ; a lig ht down of b eard o n his face The man of the New York b oat: The pal e n ess and t h e d rawll lines gone from his face, the stoo p fro m his should ers, t h e dejected look fro m his eyes. :\ crea m y tan frorn h ead to waist, from knee to f oot; swelling muscles rippling up the arm s and a c ross the s h oulders ; a s w elling barrel df a c hest that heaved with the thrus t o f the palanka; a pleasant gauntness about the c h ee ks; a happy light in hi s eyes. Hardl y recognizabl e fr o m a year's work on th e riv er, h e rode the stern, purposeful, powerful of m o ti o n. I t was late aftern oo n. The .iungle folk were stir ring. ; \ tapir hauled his gl istenin g bla c k length from the water and stood o n the bank und ecided whether to Ree o r sta nd, and wat c h ed t h e m s h oo t swiftl y by. .>\ calm stretch, and they straightened up and drew in g.eat drau ghts of the rapidly cool ing and delicately perfumed evenin g air, whil e wit h effortless str o k es they s h o t the b oat forward. >\ howler mlnkey roared hi s throaty c hall enges sa near that ther both started and the n laughed softly to each oth er. I t never failed t hat ef fect. The most startling, fearso m e sound o f the ju n g l e comes f rom that rnonkey. A pair o f m o nkeys f"lIowd in the trees overhead scol d in g intermittently. The sound o f a rapid ahead Aoated d o wn t o them. Both scanned the bank close l y, a s t h o u g h searching f o r som ething. The Indian pointed and the white man s wun g the boat and thrust it hi{!h upo n the bank. !\ turkey whirred heavily from a n earb y bus h to a l o w tree. \V ith o ut moving from t h e b oat, the white man dropped it with hi s carbine. Ther ate turkey f o r dinner, with palm cabbage and rice, saving e n o ugh so that th e l ndian did not throw his line s in th e riv e r that night,as was his c ustom. And glad l y h e s par e d some watery citi ze n s o f thi s kingdom of vibrant l ife their p e a ce [.'or t h ese tw o h ad p e netrat ed b e n e ath that s h allow, callo u s s kin o f the wild that tempts th e community dweller t o slay and destroy with o ut compunction to it s warm, se n s itive h eart that ages an d dries 3nJ stop s when it s laws are tran sg r essed but und er s tands and s helt e r s and comforts those withi n it s f o lds whe n it i s you ng and joyous. a s it was rnad e to u e . -\nci t hey drank their fill o f the cool clear water that un til n o w n o man ha d seen Then they laid t h e lll s el yes o n their palm-l eaf co u c h and drew their blankets about the m The peace of the eveni n g was on t bc.!tn, Fair calm of r h e tropic nig ht ; And the t h o u g h t inspired by the stilly hu s h C rept o'er them, and blurreti their sight. The I n d ian dropped s wiftl y to s l eep, brown, contente d fac e to the s ky, and s lept the dreamless s leep o f the innocent The white man lay and watc hed the red in the west fade yellow and b e r eplace d b y t h e amethyst blu e o f imme a s urable depth, watc h e d t h e flamin g yello w of the guayacan tree o n the hill a c ros s th e riv e r fad e in the dimming light. H e lis t e n e d intently to the roar o f the rapid, t h e whirring o f the night birds the whi s tl e o f t h e tiny gree n lizards and the teeming busy life ab o llt him. The sta r s ca m e out, ge n e r olls l y strewn, a s i s t h e habit o f t h e tro pic sky. And a g ain, il S h e hac.1 d o n e so many tim es, h e compar ed his lot with t hat o f t h e c ity dwelle r s, in t h eir blea k ston e c liffs, and his h e art ach ed with the pity o f them and with the b eauty of hi s own. H e closed his eyes. H i s breath c arn e deeply, smoothly. Last tho u g hts R o wed over hirn. H e was als ee p .-\ little w hite-faced m onkey, as though grateful f or the companion s hip climbed down a n d cur l ed him sel f in a bus h a f e w feet above the m. H e chattered softl y, querulo u s l y to himse lf. Othe r jungle denizen s ca m e and went n oisily or noi se le ss ly,

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T H E ZONIAi\. 2 1 in wate r o r o n l a n d, e a c h a cc ord ing to his clis t o m. All w e r e curi o u s abollt t hese two s trange c r eatures in th eir lan d but all seem e d to recognize instinc t i v e l y t hat t h e r e wa s a greate r f o r c e t h an t h eir o wn, a n d w hile so m e appr o a c h ed n o n e c am e n e a r Dawn R i s ing mi s t s Ope nin g o f v i s ta s Sweet c o o l air. G l e am i ng g l i s t e ning g o l d s o ( all s h ade, i n th e cas t. N ec tari n e wa t e r s H e plu ng e d i n and da s h e d a cross The I ndia n s a t bla n k e t enfo l d ed, on t h e bank a n d g rinn e d at h i s c o mpani on's f olly H e cli m b ed t h e sc ar o f a recent s lid e 011 t h e f a r bank an d sa t 011 a juttin g r oc k. Abruptl)' h e scrambled down t h e bank and peer e d intently into th e w a t er. H e straig hten e d wit h ajerk, h e a d up, arms Rungwild l y to t he skies G o ld' G old' J o hn H i s v o i ce sank to a w h i s p er. G o ld!" The I n d ian j umpe d to h i s feet a t t h e w i l d n ess o f t h e crr but s ank ba c k at it s imp::>Tr. man! Ignorant of w hat a v aun ted c i v ili z a t i o n will trade him ( o r h i s g o ld, abl e t o h o ld th e eve n t e n o r o f h i s way. Un happy man. P e r haps t o b e swer ve d fro m h i s c hosen path to a l i f e o f \ ain l o n ging b y a v i s io n ar), bubbl e The w ork progressed. A s lui ce b ox h e wn f ro m a cotto n wood. A n axe-h e wn s hovel. B a s kets woven fro m b ejuco o'erflo win g w it h glitte rin g g rain s The c a y uco l o ad ed t o the water's edge. The s tart. A wil d arr o w), voyage w i th feet braced and pa l a nka ba l a nced a c ross t h e bodr I t hrus t i n g first o n o n e s ide, th e n o n t h e oth er O n th e swifter run s with h air flying a n d body cr o u c h ed t o find a bal a nce. Only o n e a cc ident, and t h a t amusing fro m t h e s tartlin g s wiftness o f Its a ctio n The T n d ian ridin g th e b o w wh e n t hey w e r e s hootin g a narr o w p assage between a huge h ou l de r an d t h e bank, wedged his p a lan ka b eth e m anJ wa s hurl ed bac k b r e a t h l ess draped b y h i s m idd l e sectio n over t he p a l a nk a lik e a w e r ra g o n a clo th es lin e H e tumbled t h e white man fro m th e b::>at a s h e came b y an d t h e b oa t m e n a n d pa lanka bo ullced sere nely down t h e race and gro unded toget h e r o n a sand bar at its foot. A fortun a t e e n ding tndy T h ree days s ufficed t o cove r t h e s wi f t wate r it ha d ta k e n 2 to climb an d t h e)' ( o un d t h e m se l ves s ail i n g down th e bro a d l o w er s tr e t c hes o f t h e rive r w i t h a sail i m p r ov i sed (r o m a bla nk e t. Five da)'s of thi s, irk so m e a(te t h e Rig h t on th e rapid, a n d t h e r reac hed t h e first nati ve settle m e n t and hired a r i ver schoon er f or th e rest o f t h e t rip. A g ain h e l e an ed o n a steam er rail. H e waved f a r e w ell to th e I n d i a n. n o w clad in overall s an d a r ed ca p, pate n t leath e r s o n hi s feet an d s upr e m e l y h appy w h o (a ded into t h e d istan ce an d t h e sail o ( th e y aw l ( h is o wn ) b ecame a w hite s p ec k a g ain s t t h e blu e Thi s t a nn e d, d i s tin g ui s h e d lookin g w h it e m a n turne d (r o m t h e r ail an d saunte r ed u p t h e d ec k. H e pa used, look e d arolln d t o see t hat n o o n e wa s watc h ing, an d p ulled a s h inin g bit from h i s pock e t H e h e l d i t close b e f o r e h i s eyes, cli c k e d h i s t o n g u e in h i s t h r oat and o bserved sol e mnl y t o it! "The r oo t o ( all evi l Gi ve u s m o r e o ( t h e r oot." H e turned ba c k an d gazed l o n g a t th e h az)' b l u e o f t h e s h o r e line in th e d istan ce. T h e s tra i n s o ( the w a l tz c au g h t his e a r H e g lan ced b ac k a s two g irli s h fig u res in film y w h ite danced into h i s line o f v i s i o n H e lean ed ag ain o n t h e rai l h e a d b e llt, an d )'ollmig h t h ave h e ar d h i m murmur. [ w o nder? T w o n -d-!

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I3ALBOA. >-l J: tI1 N o Z :; Z

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THE ZON[AN. 23 Rulli E lVi/SOli, '20. !Ii Dani e l G oodw in, rector of th e "Stone Church" in ,\\I-any, New York, was pacing rapidly up a n d duwn his luxuriously furnished study wit h quick agitated stri des. One glance at his face sufficed to ,'ouc h f or the tumultolls state o f hi s mind. 1 won't go!" hemuttered determinedly. "They can't make me It' s not our war. America's entrance-bosh 1'111'11 claim exe mp tion. No-[ can't-I'll g ive u p my place-my pari s h 1'11I 'II-0h t hun der!" h e exp lod ed vio l e n tlv, and flung him self into a great easy c h air, whil e his face worked convu l s ively with t h e str ess of strangled e motion. How l o ng h e sat t h e r e h e never knew. Hi s h ousekeeper's "The B oa rd to see you, sir" startled him, and, hurri ed l y t hrowing on hi s coat, he r ece iv ed t h em dogged l y, almost distrustfully. Goodwin" h e heard distinctly, but far off. "\\'e hav en' t come on a very pleasant errand, to say t h e least," The voice drew n earer 1 don't deem it n ecessary to waste words. Th e fact is," the voice deafened him now, Hwe've come to ask for ),our resignation Silence The great clock on th e stairway boomed five. Silence. Two minutes dragged s lowl y by. Finall)', ris ing slow l y to his feet, pausing dazedly, as t h oug h to consider t h e situation, Goodwin spok e G e ntlemen," h e said c l early, J have fel t this coming. However you know m y views 011 a certain question uppermost in your minds. I'm sorry if th ey disp l ease you. But t o preach war a n d strife, I can not and will 110t. Please consider my resignation effective at once. Good day." And turning, h e strode frol11 t h e study. etiquette t h rown to th e winds Go odwin left Alban), almost immediate l y, and was as quickl y forgotten H e sou ght seclusion, but cou l d not find peace H e became restless, resentful, distrustful, and ever-increasing fire of hate burned deep i n his so\" I A t last, m o rose, melan c h oly, his doctrine D anie l Goodwin was called to the color s. H e went, a disgrace t o his profe ss ion to mankind to hi s cu untr y. Three months training at Fort Slocum made h im n o better. H e openly c ur sed t h e land o f his b ir t h and, when sailing fro m Camp IVle rrit for "over th ere" h e was t h e bla ck eye" of th e r e g i m ent. B oom B oo m -Sis-s-s-s Crack! B ang! H eavy firing on t h e western front. Some where out there on "No N I an's Land" lay Dani e l Goodwin, one o f a squa d o f eight, who, hardl y daring to move, were crawling s l owl)' and painfully through mud, mire, and grime to cut enem y entanglements Bullet s whizzed angrily and wrathfully spat th e ground. "Uh--" s hu ddered Goodwin, "How s lim y and how ghastly. W ar indeed!" Sudden l y t h e s k y burst into dazz l ing brilliancy as a rocket burst and fell near by And t h en all was quiet. But for th e space of a second "nl)'. Loud er a n d louder boomed the guns; faster and mor e angrily spat the bullets; redder and redder flamed th e s k),; th e ground trembled, s h oo k a n d swayed u ntil in one mighty effort, as tho' all the forces of the earth were united, a column o f soi l ro c k and gravel rose into the air to a tremendous h eig h t and fell. And D anie l Goodwi n lay still a m ongst t h e debris. At twilight of t h e f o llowing day, groaning and writhing in pain, Goodwin regained consciou s ness. H e r olled painfully over and in so doing l ay in a poo l o f blood. H e threw out hi s arms in a gesture of d istress and felt someth ing soft. R aising his h ead h e beh e l d a m angled body. H e turne d frightfully dizzy and heaved a long, low m 3a n i n the agony o f his h e lpl ess n ess. With a superhuman effort h e raised him se lf on his and l oo king more closel y, discerned t h e face of a Y0ut h. H e sank back heavily, and, moaning pitifully, sigh ed : "Must I too be sacrificed in this market of sou l s? O h th e re is no God!" and clutching wildly about as thoug h to find relief, h e grasped a tiny bit of

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T H E ZO:\, l A;,\. paper. H e laboriously raised himself again and in the dim light of the fading dav, falteri n g l v read the following: Ay. ladd:c: ti:ii for your a:n COUO[fec. GOj bonny boy, tho' you're all I han. Do Y.J:lf bit. God'::; will b e d.::mc. i\I othcr.' Goodwin la)" back and a g reat wh ite ligh t en\'e1oped his soul. His m i nd cleared and with arms Kath erine Kent, known as Katy b y h er intimates, sat swinging in t h e hammock o n the froll t porc h of the R obinson home S h e was adorab l y bewitc h ing wit h brown eyes all twinkl y wit h mischief; little red lips all p u c k e r ed u p, w hile wit h h er w h ite hands s h e tried to t u c k in a few littl e c u rls t hat would escape from t h eir proper places S h e gave a quick pus h w i t h h er foot a n d b egan swingi ng merrily. "Oh'" and s h e clas p ed h er h ands with delig h t, "it will be t h e best fun J ust t hink-oh !" .-\nd laug h afte r l a u g h f ollowed F or pity's sake K a t y, w hat's up?" and garet Robinson questi o n ed h er fri e n d wi t h i nterest. You\' e been sitti ng the r e f o r 5 minutes now, carrying on someth ing d readfuL" "i\ f aggie, I've just remem b ered w hat day it is and J've t hough t o f t h e rnost lovelicio u s sc h e me," and Katherine swung h arder than ever. "\\'hv, to-day's -Thursday. J don't see a n y thing remarkable about t hat." And M arga ret show e d h e r disg ust by turning u p h e r p e rf ectly good R oman nose. Y es, hone) bunc h it is-Thursd a y It's a l so the dar after yesterday and t h e daribefore tomorrow but--" a n d h ere s h e st!)pped swi nging and lean e d forward -"it's also, dearest it's a l so the first day of J anuarr of the year '9-20; 9 2 0," sht: repeated with eyes twink l i n g bri g h ter than ever. "1g-20. \\'h y' t hat' s l eap ycar," a n d M argaret gave each word its due. J should say it i !" o u tstretched, thi s rna n prayed; prayed in th e s tar ligh t ; p r ayed as n eve r b e f o r e ; pra yed f o r f o r g iv eness a n d sal vatio n An d so h e pa ssed in to p erfect un de r s tan d ing with his M a k e r in t h e g ha stlr l o neliness o f N o 's L and ." "But wha t di ff ere n ce does it m a k e to--" s h e paused, q u estio nin g l y "Us? Oh J s up pose i t does n t mak e an y d i f' t o y ou," a nd K a th erine s h o w ed h e r indiff e r e n ce to t h a t f eature o f i t, "but-it does t o m e " I t does? F or pity' s sa k e, Kate, b e m erc iful ca n 't you--" "Lis t e n i\I agg i e a n d in d u e cour se t h e m ys t e r y will b e reve al ed "wit h d r a m a ti c ardor w h e n it' s l e ap year it's a w o m a n 's b o un de n duty t o find out a f e w t h i n gs th a t s h e w ould n 't d ar e m e nti o n at o t h e r tim es Su c h a s h o w man y c h a n ces s h e h as a nd-er-a-" cc Kat h erine K e n t, yo u'r e not t h inkin g o f pr opos-e r-gettin g m a r--!" "Of pro p os in g? I s h o u ld say n ot! But o f finding out how m any c h a nces o f b e in g turn ed d o wn I have, if i n -I-year s I s h o ul d deci de t o p r o p ose t o someon e," Kath erine gave a knowing w i nk T s h o u l d say J h ave " Y ou m ean you're goi n g t o pr o p ose n o w t o som e desir abl e m a l e so th a t if in 4 year s yo u s h ould dec ide to p ropose to thi s sa m e des irab l e rna l e you'd k n o w how man y c h ances you 'd h a v e, taki n g f or g ranted, o f cour se, w i t h s ar c a s t i c e m pha s is,"that t h e de li cate f ee lings and-er-'I ov in gs' o f t his des i rable ma l e w ould n t c hange in .. yea rs." And Ma rgaret R o bin so n g ave h e,. h e a d a toss. "i\ia r ga ret R o binson you r e too i m p ossible! Kath erine l aug h e I did n t s a y a n y thin g o f th e kind S h e took a dee p b rea th an d s ta r t e d in, I m going to p i c k o u t t h r ee n o rma l candidates,

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THE ZON I AN. 2S sort of-er w ell yo u might say pr o p ose t o the m jus t to see what'll happ e n If non e o f th e three seem at all overcom e b y m y c h arms I 'll kno w th e n that ] m destin ed to b e a h o p e l ess old m a i d and liv e with a cat and a p oll parr o t, but -if ev e n o n e s h o uld b e impr e s sed I'll liv e inh ope," and Kath e rin e roll ed h e r eyes with a s aintl y expr ess i o n o n h e r r o gui s h face. "Wellit might w ork." But Marga ret app e ar e d a trifle dubi o u s for whi c h l e t' s n o t judge h e r too har shly "Might? I t ell y ou, Margare t R o bin so n, it will work, and e v e n if everyon e r efuses [0-Oh Mag g i e, it's g oing to b e to O muc h J umpin g u p, Kath e rin e b e gan to walt z Margare t o v e r th e p o r c h J u s t a minute ple a se," M a rgar e t 's v o i ce w a s final. Wh o ar e t o be the p oo r un s u s p ec tin g vic tim s ? "W-e-I -1. I hav en't e xa ctly decid ed." Ka t h erine pau se d. "J u s t a minute." l\I arga r e t w a t c h ed h e r whil e s h e ran to her n e ar-b y pile o f book s an d r e turn e d wi th pad and p e n c il. "Le t 's s it in th e hammock," and s h e ran t o w a r d it, dra g ging Margar e t, N o w help m e mak e a lis t of all th e p oss ibl e s," Aft e r a f e w minutes' writin g and confe rring t h e lis t wa s fini s h e d. ) u s t 6 b oys I d e v e n care to ta ckle :-.low l e t 's pic k out th e 3 m os t n o rmal o f th e m all. Jimmy Ric h a r ds he' s toogood looking I treally i s n t n o rmal in t h a tsexand 1 might try e xtra har d to win him, whi c h w o uld ruin m y test. S o a p e n cil lin e was run thro ugh p oo r Mr. James Ric h a r ds J a c k M o rgan h e's n o rmal do n t you think?" And Kath erine turn ed questi o nin g eyes t o war d her c hu m Oh, yes, he's n orma l e n o u g h. H e ce rtainl y i sn't a to o g oodl oo king b oy Kate's eyes h ad rather, it w o uld see m, an unn ecessary fire The n after a glan ce at Margaret' s s h inin g face, Oh you s t o p t e a sing rne, a n d afte r g i ving h e r c hum' s arm a pla yful s l ap s h e r es um e d Dwight G ree n ley-too bright and studi o us-n o t n orma l in an y sex R o bert And e r so n I think h e's n o rmal." Yes, I think h e'd b e all right." An d f o r o nce Marg ar e t agr eed. P e t e r Em erto n d o n't lik e his namC-3up pose h e can't h e lp it b ec au se I do n t happ e n t o li k e th e nam e P e t e r an y way h e's b ette r th a n th a t o ld s tupid R oge r J o hn son. Goodn ess m e M ag, suppose R o g e r wa s a n o rmal mal e Kath erine was truly aghast at the p oss ibility "One thing I kn o w K a t e. Y o u w o ul d n t b e f o rmulating sc h e mes t o ca t c h o ne." Marg aret smil e d. I s h ould s a y n o t The n s h e s ur veyed h e r list. "I think [ 'II ta ckle R o b e r t t h e n P e t e r Eme r t o n, and then J ack M o rg a n I 'll startl et's seew e ll, a s soo n as possible." Sh e g a zed a t th e pa per and h e r wand e ring gla n ce n o t ed h e r wri s t wa tc h. G o od night Maggi e, it's 5.-15 an d w e' r e goin g t o h av e c o mpany for dinn er. I'll ha ve t o fly o r m o th e r' II think s o m e thin g s h app e n e d t o h e r ang elic littl e daugh t e r And, with a ba c kward wink, s h e gathe r e d her book s an d scampe r ed. A f e w w ee k s a ft e r o n a Saturday m o rnin g Margar e t R o binson an s w e r e d a t e mp es tu o u s t e l e ph o n e bell. It was Ka t h e rin e Ru s h t o th e ai d o f o n c disconsolate! B r in g yo ur ra c k e t Hurry!" Marg ar e t ran f o r h e r rac k e t anxi o u s t o kno w wha t had happ e n e d. T e n minutes l a t e r the two girl s w e r e settl e d o n o n e o f th e gard e n b e n c hes. H \ Vell, wh a t luc k and what n e w s Kat y?" Sh e was bubbling ove r with int e rest. "It's-R o b ert And e r so n," Kate d e clared trying to loo k down h earte d but not b e ing v e r y s u ccess ful. R o b e rt And e r so n ? Oh, y es h e wa s c a se num b e r o n e Any s u cce s s?" Br e athl ess l y s h e wait ed "No n e AbsoIute I y n o n e H e's h o p e l e ss J u s t think h e can't e v e n imagine it," m o r e d i sc o n solatel), th a n e v er. I ma g in e it ? I m a gin e what?" puzzlin gl y Wh y y es, and Kathe rine b e gan to hum C a n you i m agi n e a cozy little cottage ; Can yo u i m agi n e o n e bui l t f o r yo u a n d me." H eave n s Kath e rin e K e nt y o u d o n t m e an did y ou s ing that so n g to h im a n d m e an it?" Margar e t was h o rrifi e d. "I\1a ggi e, d e ar, o f co urse, 1 di d n t m e an It. Katy was hurt. I jus t want e d to kn o w his o pini o n on th e s ubj ec t." Margar e t n o t inte rrup t in g s h e continu ed Y o u kn o w I've b ee n tagging R o b ert An de r so n s o m e what s ham e full y f o r th e las t twO w ee k s ." I s h o uld think I do! Wh e n ),ou ha ve n t b ee n p ee ring out o f th e window, w a iting till h e s ta r t e d to sch oo l you've b ee n thro wing pape r at him and making eyes a c r os s th e cla ss room. S o metimes, Kathe rin e, I'm almost a shame d of you,"

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16 THE ZO:\"J.'\:\" there was reg.et in voice, "th o u g h most of the time I 've kn own you've been having a good rime and have tri ed to convin ce mrs elf that it's all f o r th e best." "\Yell it isn't my fault. I cou ldn' t t hink o f oth er wa y to bring to t h e n otice o f that boy, anJ I've certa inl y succeeded. :\nu, o h, the stale, stale jokes h e has tri ed to pull ofr, at II'hich I had to lau g h to pia\' the ga m e right. Bu t it's been quite a bit o f fun. L a s t nig h t, after I h ad hinted going to, coming fro m, and stayi n g in school, that I love rnov i es, and w as just dyi ng see D o ugla s Fairbanks in "Oh, Bar" h e finally go t up e n o u g h spunk to a s k m e to go. J was de-lig h ted! I knew mr c han ce h ad com e. The tim e I s p ent in fixing up for h im t he m e an thing! I even wor c mr n ew r ose dress the unappr eciative s impleton \V ell, w e went and though I h ad a stupid tim e, I survived. Whe n w e reached h ome, it b ei ng earh I a s ked him in. I sat down at th e pian o a n d 'sang, a n d o n ce in a whil e h e joined in. H e h as a pretty good voice, J decla r e it' s a s hame-a good voi ce is slIc h an asset t h e n. quite a ccide n tally, o f cour se, l sa n g "C an yo u imagin: a little C1ttagc; Can ),ou imagine: one built f o r you ; n d me All the while I wa s s inging I l ooked at him an d h e l oo ked ba c k but h e was laughing. The n sort 0' so b erlik e, h e s pok e w hil e I h e l d my br eath. 'Say, Kate,' h e sa id, 'that so ng mad e m e t hink o f t h e girl o f m y dreams.' 'Oh, do d esc rib e h e r t o mc,' I wa s j u s t running over with sweetn ess 'O h, it see m s crazy t o talk about her, but the n, s h e's gentle and s w eet,' I c hu ckled, that was m e, o f cour se, 'and pr etty,' plenty o f h o p es ther e 'and domestic', I wa s n t exactly so s ur e there, 'o pp osed t o s uffrag e ', my heart ank, 'in fact I 'v e never seen h er yet but ma ybe some brig h t clay' -and wit h great ea rn est ness, h e wandered on. Thinking of n othing e l se to do I let all th e mu s i c s lam on th e piano. Tha t woke him up and h e l e ft soo n a fterwar ds. H e's hopel es s and I know n o w that h e ca n 't b e n orma l so I content m yself. I s h all tackl e Mr. P e t er Emerton right away. Surel y there m u s t b e so me boys who have some sense anyway. "Katy, I'm sorry about R obert Anderso n, but of course he isn't normal. \Vhat are yo ur next plans?" "Oh, I don't kn o w, but I m n o t going to l ose any tim e over P e t e r. Jus t think o f all those p r ec i o u s h ou r s in whic h I pur s u ed R ober t And e r son. I f eel like--" w ith which explosio n Kath e r ine arose t o get h e r rac k e t t o pla y tenni s. i \'l onday nig ht iVlargaret received a n o t e via K athe rin e's little broth e r Sh e o p e n ed it a nxio u s l y. D ear M aggie: I attacked Peter Emert o n thi s aftern oo n and h ave dec ide d never a gain to arrack any o ne w h ose nam e I don't like. T o b el(in w i t h I wal k ed home from sc h oo l with h i m ( t ake it literallv please). Y o u oug ht co h ave h eard t h e wonde rful excu se aoou t go ing t o the drug store near Ilis h o u se, I f ramed u p. I t wa s a \ \ h opper. The extremities to whi c h o ne will go to gain a purpose are re:tllr dreadfu l On rhe war I probed him with about marria ge. I really ha d to use a m o nkey-wrench to extrac t the m. An d what do yo u think? H e's a r eg ular woman_hater! Sars h e w ould n't even walk h ome fro m sc h oo l with one ( YOli s ee he also real ized the real s ituati o n ), and a s for surrendering hi s life and pocketboo k, wh y h e'd die first H e laid especia l emphasis o n the poc kerbook, you rna}' be s ure. l\l ercena r r old wrerc h Ilefr him with plea s ure, walked into the drug Store, out again and h o m e ?\'ever again! Y ou r s in despair o f being an old mai d. K atherine Kent." Margaret f o l ded the note wit h a s igh. "Poo r Kathe rin e, h e r plan wa s a lmost s p oiled! On e m o r e h o pe-J ack M o rgan. P e r h aps h e wou l d butwh o kn o w s ? And kind hearted Margaret decided to go up and c h ee r lip Kathe rin e Whe n s h e ente red t h e K ent gate, s h e pause d. Who wa s s ingin g? She listen e d. It sounded d ec i ded l y lik e th e deep, b ass vo i ce of J ack Morgan. W as it? It mu s t b e But w hat was h e s in g in g, and wh e r e was h e? The faint creaking of the hammock wa s h e ard. Sh e w ent n ea r er. Out o n the breeze floated a song whic h see med to b e in k ee ping wit h th e tim e and occas ion. "K K K K : lt y, beautiful Kat)', YOlt're t h e on l y g-g--g-girl t h at I ador e" Margaret closed the gate wit h an a mu sed l oo k o n h e r face. K a t y didn't n eed any of h e r "ch ee r !I1g lip What Iud happe n ed to change th i n g s so? \Ve II anyway, s h e knew Kat e wa s happy be c au se s h e a l ways said .Jack wa s the nices t b oy s h e kn e w only h e n eeded a good "sh a kin g up." "Shakin g lip ?" S he repeated th e w o rd s H e sure l y ha d r ece i ved a good o n e b y t h i s sc h e m e of Kate's. S he r eflec ted C o uld it b e poss ibl e that Kate ha d delib erately t r ied to administer this s hakin g and had the r e f ore invented thi s sc h eme? She won dered.

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THE ZO:\IA:\. 2i UN DlA EN EL CANAL. Yi@I R u t h Iri!;Q '20. Vi{jj/;/ S----R e cogi endo eI p erio dico una rnaii.ana ha ee algunas semanas lei estos tltlil os : "Gran d e r rumbe e n e l C orte d e Culebra a yer." E sto bastaba para hacerme curiosa; a s i es que cuanda hube Icido todo e l articulo, r eso lvi p e dirl e a pap a que m e Ilevara a1 trabajo con oj e J dfa s i guiente Antes de proseguir debe n sabe r, Uds rni s lector es que papa trabaja e n un rcm o lcacio r e l e lla l a caus a d e l derrll rn b e, es t a e n eI corte d e Clil e b r a. Yo I e pregunte r com o r esultado fui m os, papa Y ),0, al correa para es p erar e l jitney que lie va s i empre a l os empleados 3mcricanos al trabajo. D es pu es d e lin viaj e p a r Corozal l os o tras puebl os lIegamos a Para i so Alii s llbirn os a l buque que lIeva a l os trabajadores a S lI S dife r entes iugares Fuc alii que VI p a r prill1 e r a v ez e l d e r rumbe EI importe d e r oc a s d e lodo, de are na y de barro e ra e n o rrn e EI corte estaba clos habiarnos atado ados alijador es, lIe n os de l o d o y procedfam o s p o r eI canal, c u ando figur e n se ll1i s orpresa, 01 la exclamac i o n : N o e n c u entro a coc in e r o nin guno N os v im os e n un apllro P e r o cuando uno ti e n e hall1b re hara cualquie r a cos a para sati sfacerla. P u es pronto e l capitan, papa y yo b ajamos a la cocina y preparamos l a co m ida. D e j o es a comida a s u s imaginac i o n es D espues d e cuatro h oras d e navegar, lIegamos a una c ueva EI contramaestre mi d i 6 e l agua, a la h o n d u r a justa n os paramos y e l capitan grit6 envozalta: D escarg u en! n ruido de true n o cuando l os dardos d e los alijador es se afl ojarol1, espurnas de a gua surgie r o n al aire nuestro r e m o lcador se abalan7.6 p e ligr osam ente, s e m e h e l 6 la s angre e n la s v e n as y l os alijador es d escargaro n. : \ est e m o m e nto el proyectar se apag6. O t r a vez n os vimos e n un apuro serio Pero e l capitan, can Ia mayor sangre fria, hizo v a lveI' e l buque y l e n tame n t e n os pus imas e n marc h a a Paraisa. EI viaj e a ese pll eblecito era grand i oso La luna lIe na brillaba sabre el a gU:l tra n qlli l a con un es pl e ndor plate ado. L as Iuces co l orad .. c e n t e l l earo n co m o a stros l e j a n os LJ.s bris'l s fres..:a s agita b :lI1 el a g lla y la s o la s chiquitas arr llllar o n suave m ente contra eI b uque Y esc u chando alii e n la so litll...l d e la n oc h e quieta, m e d ormi.

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BALBOA DRY DO C K AND SHOPS ------.... ----------,

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T I I E ZOl\'IA"I. 29 !j; i; BALBOA DRY DOCK AND SHOPS. e GrGrge D nnskin, '21. !fi The photograph r eproduced o n the opposite page shows three ships in the dry dock of the Bal boa plant, one of the mos t effici ent plants of its kind in the world. I n determining th e effic i e ncy o f a plant o n e must consider the s up e rvi s i o n, the e quipm e nt an d the class of workmen employed. Un de r supe r vision we will con s id e r h o w the s up e r v i so r s ar e chosen, their qualific ati o n s e t c .; und e r equipment, all modern equipment; and und e r c lass o f workmen employed, t h eir qualifi c ati o n s h o w and from where employed. First we will examine the s up e r v i s i o n. The superintendent of th e plant mu s t b e a na v al co n structor and a graduate o f f\nnapolis, and o n e who is capable of handling large groups o f m e n H e is appointed by the S ec r etary o f the Nav)". The minor supervis ors, su c h a s t h e f o r e m e n and l e a d in g men, are chos e n from the s hop s b y th e s up e rint e n dent according to th eir effic i e ncy and senio rit y o f serv I ce. The equipment is of the lates t and m os t im proved type. To illu strate we s hall take the f org ing of a propelle r shaft and the c a s tin g o f a cyl inder. The propelle r shaft i s forg e d in the bla c k smith forging shop wh e r e in f o rgin g it will b e subjected to a pressure o f p ounds b y the hydraulic presses and p ounds b y the large drop-hammers Afte r f orging it i s take n to the machin e shop and turne d o n one o f the big lathes vYe will leave the f orging h e r e and r eturn to the foundry w here t h e ca sting of the c ylind e r i s made 1 n its casting, cru c ibles capabl e o f c a s tin g 2 S ton s per day a r e us e d. The foundry can c a s t eithe r iron, brass, or steel. The n the j o b i s tak e n to th e machin e shop wh e r e if very bi g it will b e planed on the large s t plane r whi c h ha s a tra ve l o f feet by II fee t b etwee n the h o u s ing, b y f ee t from the top of the house t o the table Afte r p l a nin g it will b e taken to the large lathe whi c h ha s a swing of '+ f ee t h y 105 f ee t ill l e n gth. The n it is finished o ff and b oth the cylinder and the propeller shaft are taken to the dry dock wh e re a ship is being repaired. The dry doc k i s 1,000 feet !Ii b y 11 0 feet b y +5 f ee t d e e p ove r the kee l blo c k s A p ontoon can b e added to it making it approximate l y 1 ,050 f ee t This d oc k can dryd oc k the larges t ship in the world in about four h ours On the far s id e o f the d oc k can b e seen the s ot o n s t e am wrecking c ran e whi c h run s al o ng th e edge of the d oc k and lift s b oile r s fr o m the b o iler shop to the ships I n the b oile r s h o p the r e are some v ery in t e r esting and m o d ern mac hin ery, probably chi e f among these are the s t ee l plate roller s which r oll s t ee l up t o a thi ckness o f 2 inch e s. Here also the welding i s d o n e whi c h saves the Canal thousands o f dollar s a year. Three classes of welding are d o n e h e r e They ar e th e rmit e a ce t y l e ne and elec tri c wel d in g N ear the b oile r s h o p i s the car sho p whi c h makes the cars f o r the Panama Railroad C o mpan y a n d also f o r o llt s id e companies. A pa sse ng e r coa c h of native mahogan y c an be built in fro m 5 to 6 w ee k s wh e n only 4 men a r e w o rkin g o n it. The ma c hin e f o r taking s crapp e d wh ee l s o ff tru c k s c an e x e rt a force of 200 t o ns, The r e also i s the planing s h o p in whi c h all native w oo d i s hand led and plane d t o a fin e l y finished pi ece o f furniture fro m a r o u g h tree. Nearly all o f the w oodwork of the r ebuilt C ri s tobal wa s made h e r e A s t o the workme n, the y are the pick o f t h e States All s kill e d labo r mus t fir s t be citizens of the United Sta t es All m echanics must have yea r s' ex p erie n ce a ft e r compl etio n of apprenti ce s hip. All m echanics are cla ss ified a s fir s t class and mu s t qualify or they are return e d to th e Unite d States All trad es hav e a ce rtain numbe r of apprenti ce s. The appr e nti ces ad v an ce e v e ry thre e months ac co r d in g to the ir s kill. The y w ork with the r e g ular m ec hani cs o n r e gular pr o du ctio n work. They are und e r th e s up e r v i s i o n o f th e s hop f o r e m e n. Tn orde r to mak e the m profic i ent in th eir ch ose n trad e they are r e quir e d to atte nd the appr e ntic e s c hool whi c h i s h e ld o n e afterno on, 4 h au r s p e r w eek. I n the app r entice schoo l the y are in stru c t ed in m ec h anic al dr a wing, blu e print read ing, s h o p arithm e tic and practical engineering.

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30 THE ZON IA N. If at the end of the J months they ha" e not recei\"ed an average of 75 per cent they remain on the same job for 3 months m ore Then if t hey fail t o receive such a grading they are n o longer employed as apprentices. The whole course i s + years. If at the end of the apprentices hip they have satisfactori l y qualified they are given certificates of proficien c signed hy the Superintendent of the Division, the Superintendent of Scho o ls, and bv th e Governor of th e Canal. This plant, as ha s be e n sa id before, i s o n e o f t h e most efficient working p lants o f the world A s an exampl e of efficiency we will con s ider a few o f the many cases. The ron Steuben, f ormerly the Crown Prince, wa s hit by a mine in the war zone, h er plates were buckled and th e s t er n of h er k eel was badly bent. A Phil ade l phia shipyard wanted J months to co m p l e t e the job. The Canal cabl ed to send h e r h ere. She was sent h ere a n d fini s h ed in the r eco rd time o f 1 7 days. Another exampl e i s the case o f the 5 interned German ships which were fro m P eru w h ere they had b ee n almost scrapped by the crew. They were finis h din appoximately o n e year. Still anoth e r case is t hat of the Cristobal. In the photograph the 9,QCX)-ton Cristobal i s at the repair wharf. The Cristobal was practically r eb",!t at thi s plant. It had b ee n a freighter and was c han ged to a passenger s hip. This was finis h ed in approximate l y I 2 month s i\Iost people in the States do not r eal iz e t hat the Canal i s the most efficient canal of its type in th e world and that it is ofim portan ce in case o f W:1:-. "'HEX A FELLER ;\EEDS A QUARTER. Cl'rlrur,r :'.111 /-Iardt'.t'Id, '.?2. Jimmy Slad e n eeded a quarter and h e n eede.! it badly. T om orrow would be his m0th er's birthday, and he had dete rmined to buy h e r that b ea u tiful red handkerch ief that was displayed in th e window, at the J ew's BLIt t h e handkerchief was marked with a prominent "25c." sign, and Jimmy didn't have a cent, and what was worse, h e ha d no means o f getting any mon ey. H e paced up and down before the window, trying to get an ins pirati on. Suddenly h e was seized w i t h a bright id ea H e e ntered th e store a n J addressed him se lf to the fat and bustling proprietor. "i\1r. Mogelewsky, do yuh ne ed a b oy tLIh go tuh th' post office 'r a nything?" "Ach, no!" was the reply, "get Ollt of min e schtore, yetl" Jimmy got. H e looked up and down t h e street. At a near-by grocery store, a man was ali g h ti n g from a wagon. Hey, mister!" Jimmy ran t oward the man, "D'yuh want m e tuh h oI' yer h orse? " Wh y, son, that hryrse w O LIlJn't stir from h ere if he had wing s to fly. The m,n smi l d kinJly on the upturneJ f.lce, ami ente e d the store. J imm)' journeyed a littl e (.Irt:", up th e s t reet H e saw a new s b'1Y 3:->pro:lc h inJ him. "Cats and d 19S, rats anJ mice; a big l ong l adder an' a pail o f rice'" h e greeted the oth e r b o)' with t h e call of tht gang. "Kin I sell some paptrs, Dick?" "All sold, 'cept a few t hat's promised." Di ck passed on and Jimmy sat down on the curb. On th e opposite curb sat a little Yiddi s h girl, an acquaintan ce o f his. She was playing with her rag doll, and talking to it in Yiddi s h H e s ur veyed h e r listl ess l y a nd then g a zed down t h e street. A.n a u to m o bil e was coming toward him H e aro se from the curb, rnuc h as o n e does when one ha s sat on a tack, and rush ed ac r oss the street. Seizing t h e rag doll from the loving grasp of its fond pa en, h e threw it into the path o f the car. The littl e giI seeamed as s h e saw her poor c hild go un de r th e whee l s The car stopped and the man w h o was driving, got o ut. "What's t h e matter, littl e o ne?" h e asked. "You r un over h e r doll an' s h e don't lik e it," stated Jimmy promptly The m an s mil ed "What's the damage?" h e inquired. "s x b t "." J imm y p ol1oul1ce J thi s verd ict afte' having confe:-red witl t h e lady in que.>ti o n, i n he' nativ.:-tongue, and h avi n g wai ted f or h er to sit down again on the curb with h er wounded doll. The ml" grinn ed broadly H e put his h and into his p.JCket and pull ed out a quarter and a p cent piece. H e dropped the coins into the h a n d of the a ttorn;!y) got in to his car, and drove off. kid, t h anks," a n d wit h a grin o f contentment, Jimmy shoved th e 50-cent p iece into th e hand of his un w illin g accomplice, and r an happily down the street with the quarter.

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THE ZON1AN. 3 1 E L D ESG R AC I "IDO. .\ I { a ri a, f\l[a ria! .1\ ver esc ca f e, que )'a es h or a de ir m e. cosas q u i eres que h aga a un t i cmpo? Vestir l os c h ieos, encender l a \UIl1 br e y limpiar te l os zapatos. has v u c l to l oco hombre? y hacerme !legar tarde a I onc i na! Qu e desgraciada soy' V aya! D o n de es t a e l cafe, -En l a lu u u m b re -contesta J\i l aria Ibr3.l1ci) -Caramba! Que mu jer! IVlira 1 0 111: h as h ec h o h ace r. H e derramado e l rota d os platillos y ya son l as oc h o )T m e dia-::xdama An ronio e l esposo, e n t r a ndo a l a s ala carganJ:) 103 pedazos de l os platillos y tod o man c haclo d cafe, Que d es grac iada soy! -No pu cdo espera r m as. !\[ e voy s in el cafe-bra m a el esposo. Cage SlI g:::>rro y se m ar c h a d e l a casa furiosa. POI' I n tarde t lego a l a casa, con LIn m ozo t rala sab re la cabeza un catre, y co n una muj er de ctim e n s i on es i nm e nsas que a la vista pareda un a niiiera i V l i r a, 1 0 q u e te traigo Ya puedes p erde r c ui dado. H e traido a D orotea para qu e te a)' ude e n los t rabajos de l a casa. A h o ra pu edes dormir la siesta mu)' tran quila. Ay! E spos o mlo! Q u e buena e res-dijo N l aria, besa n do l o can much a a l e gria. As! es q u e D orote a, al dla s iguient e tom6 c a r go de todos l os c h icos Empez6 p o r banar y vestirlos y a l as oc h o m enos diez mand6 a l os dos I1UI S grandes a la escue l a. ClIando Antonio lleg6 p o r l a tarde, e n contr6 a l' 1 aria mlly bie n vestida y lo s c hic os todos senta dos a l a m esa. Di.6 una mirada d e aprobac i6n y estaba mll y sati sfec h o de Sll fortuna. -Si h ubieras vista a D.J:-0te a h oy R o b erto se estaba ba1anda y a l a i r gritos, D o rotea corri6 haci a e l bJ 10 Y ahrie nd o l a pu-erta e n contr6 el ba 1 0 lIe n o de agua )' R o berto ,udan jo pa r a salC ogie nchl o p or l a s orejas 1 0 saco del b:lil:> I e di6 dos )' vis t i e n do l o, 1 0 hiz;) ir afu e ra a jugar-dijo N [ aria con ri sa Ca ramb:t! Creo qu e D .Jrote a n os va a servi r muy b i e n -EI d amingo d esp u es d e mi sa, \ n tonio propuso qu e t odos fuer an a la plaza. D ejaremos a D:..>rotea p.lra que ll)S cuide la c asa-anad i 6 i\l aria. : \ la s t res, j\I ura, -\ntoni o y l os cuatro c h i cos s ali ero n para l a pla za. D.:spues de divertirse mLlc h o se marcharo n otra ve z a l a casa, mlly ca n sados y hambri e n .. t os ... P ero cual'do lIegaron noen cantrara n ni a D .Jro ten, n i e l catre. Se h a Ile vad o h a sta mis c h i nelas-dijo An tonio porque se h a ida. t ratamos mlly bie n Jij o j\' larla se n ta ndase al lado de una m es ita. es esto?-dijo, v i c ndo lin papeli llo sabre l a m es a. Cogf c ndolo can a50mbr!) \ 0 abri 6 y SeilJr:l pueJo e;p:!rar hasta que ud. IIt:gue p l r a decirle que VO}. Est.)" de prisa. Si me queJo aqu i u n dh mas l os chicos acabaran Su esp030 n o m e dijo que tendria que cui.i..ar a cuatro IllJ:Jll::ho.;: \" a eso e.;: tlel1l:l.siado No se ap.Jren p.,t mi s .. llano que no 10 quiero. : \ci.ios, ojaia se:l. para siempn::. Sor. su segura servido r a (e n ottO mundo) [JaitOI'EA. Qu e desgraciada

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32 THE ZONI Al'\. LES ILES DE PERLES. France; II/ nlberg, '20. Quel drole petit village! II y a 11 pe u pres qual"ante huttes sur un e coBine. Le s murs de huttes sont faits de la boue r ouge et d u bambou. L es toits sont faits des branches du palmier. II n'y a qu' une grande c h ambre da n s chaqu e hutte a u l es naturel s mang e nt et Ull ils dormel1t e t a u ils recoivent leu:-s amis; o u l e urs poules, l eurs c hien s, leurs c h ats, et leurs autr es animaux dorment et mange nt j tout da n s l a meme c h ambre. L es huttes sont p l acees dan s des files avec un petit sen tier battu entr e c haqu e file. On peut voir au pied de la co lline, des canots. Au tour de quelques huttes on trouve des plante s qui se sont fanees Devant c haqu e m aiso n e tte il y a un tro nc d'arbre cre llx s ur l eq u e l es t plac e une plan c h e qui tiel1t du r i z vert qui y es t plac e p our se sec h e r P arm i quel q u es huttes n o t ables es t la cour de Jus tice qui e tait occ uppee autrefo i s par le s pirat es. Sur I e toit de cette hutte des pirates il ya un drapean b l anc avec un squ e lett e nair. On peut voir aussi des ruin es d'u n e viei ll e eglise avec quelqu es s tatue s fanees e t cassees et un petit a u tel m a l n e tu, del abr e et tres sal e. P I N K HANDKERCHIEFS. AlliIn Sa r gent '2J. Mary Ellen loved pink handke r chiefs, so w h e n her friends gave h er some whit e o n es f o r her birthday s h e was very mu c h disappointed. She was a littl e angr y, too. That was in J une. I t took n early a m onth f o r Mary Ellen to decide what to d o with t h ose so ft, white things. Then a man repres e nti n g t h e Smyth e's S oa p an d D ye w o rk s ca m e to th e little village and gave a f e w publ i c demonstrati o n s. Mary Ellen s questi on was settled. The ins ipi d white thing s became a b e autiful deep pink. One afternoon in July, Mary Ellen was go in g to h er aunt's h o u se with so me books-al so h er pink handkerchief. The r oa d was dusty, h aving seen no rain f or nearly a m o nth. The few tre es h e r e and there seemed to c rave water, while the parched, brown grass t h ought it s end h ad come. Not a breeze stirr ed anywh e r e L oo kin g in the distance one could see th e h e at rising in lines above the country r o ad. Mary Elle n wa s hot and not ve r y comfortabl e as s h e tru dged o n with her books. Every step o r tw o th e pink h andkerchie f was br oug h t up to a very war m and dusty face to wipe off t h e d r o p s o f moistu r e t h e r e. I t was with a sig h o f reli e f that Mary Ell e n, con s oled with thoughts of s ugar cookies and l arge glasses of lemonade, stood o n h e r aunt's doorstep and rang the b ell. A step in t h e h a llw ay, a fum ble at the la tc h and Aunt Marie ope n ed the door. But i nstead o f reli eving th e burden ",f th e joy-anti c ipatin g niece, s h e stoo d a s tho' barring h e r out, gazing at th e m o i s t a n d drooping face b e f ore h er. "Mary Ellen!" s h e cried, M y goodness, child, w hat h ave yo u got?" B ooks, Auntie," r e plie d Mary Elle n, taki n g a step f o r ward. "Ge t int o thi s h o u se!" went on Aunt Mari e. "Mercy me! "Vhat s hall I do?" T oo pu zzled to say anything Mary Ell e n allowed h erse l f to b e l ed i n to th e parl o r w h e r e her aunt to ld h e r t o "lie ver y s till for jus t a few minutes Of co urs e the l ying still" was all right, but why mus t Aunt M arie weep and wai l and c r y, HOh o h o h I kn ow yo u must b e getting s mallpox or scarlet f eve r Oh' o h An d Mary's on l y child' Now i\1ary Elle n was ve r y s up e r s titious, and it d i d n't take l o n g f o r h e r to b e al m os t ill with excite m ent and sympath y f o r h e r self. L ying wit h e y es uplifted, l oo king at th e ce iling angelically Mar y Ellen r ev i e wed her life's his t o r y, wipi n g h e r face fre qu e ntl y w ith h e r handke r chie f as s h e th o u ght o f t h e times s h e had l ain l o ng h ours in b ed in s t ead of going to c hu rc h She wonde r ed

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THE ZONIAK. 33 if, after sh e was dead, s h e w o uld go to th e h eave n s h e had h er doubts about, and if h e r loving parents and friends would d e c o rat e h e r grave with the pink ro s es s h e l o v e d b es t. Aboutfifrcen minutes lat er,Aunt i\l ari e weepin g and wailing, brought D oc t o r Ri x, th e o nl), d oc tor the villag e boaste d of, into the parl or. H e l oo k ed very wis e and imp ortant a s he fel t of the pati ent's pu l se and said, H e r pul se i s b eating n ormally." Next h e passed his hand over h e r p e rpl e xed brow. Telling the somewhat con s o l e d aunt that h er niece had n o f e ver, the do c tor r eques ted that so m e ice wrapp e d in a t o we l b e put o n J\1ary Ell e n 's foreh e ad. I n a f e w minutes th e pati ent felt a heavy sen s ati o n on h e r f o r e h ead. But th e ice h ad not b e en wrapp e d up w ell, f o r soon littlestr e am s of water were making th eir course d o wn 1\I arr ElJe:-. s face. A s s h e wip e d th e m off w i th h e r han d k e r chief, Doctor Rix watc h e d h e r face H e n oticed th a t more pink sp o t s appe ar ed Turning t o th e aston ished aunt h e s ai d ":\ littl e soap and w a t e r ple ase. \rith vig o r and soap an d water, D oc t o r R ix rubbed the patient's face L o A s Aunt l\Jari e watc h ed, th e co l o r di sappeared. But h e r c uri os it y wa s n o t s ati sfied until s h e saw th e doct o r we t l\1ar y Ell e n 's handke rchi e f an d rubito n his hand S po t s s imilar to th ose o n Ell e n 's face appeared. The m oo n wa s bri ght an d full a s l\lary Ell e n walk e d h o m e that evenin g Sh e bre a t h ed in th e cool e v e ning air and th o ugh t o f h e r afternoon 's e xp erie n ce. \ "he n s h e r e a c h e d h e r h orne s h e w e n t t o h e r r oo m whe r e fro m a s h elf s h e t oo k a b ox o f pink dye, preparing to throw it out o f h e r wind o w a s far a s s h e c ou l d. Carelessl y turning it upside d o wn, s h e r e ad o n th e b otto m o f t h e b ox,"Fas t c o l o r s n o t guaranteed ." The n ext day whil e at th e drug stor e Mar), Elle n m e t th e man who so ld h e r th e d ye H e wa s t o inte rest th e o wn e r o f th e drug s tor e in his soaps and d yes A s Ell e n ente r ed h e s aid, I f you don 't beli e v e m y dyes ar e good, a s k thi s ) 'oung la d y what s h e thinks o f th em." "Oh they ar e ve r y good f o r dyes whose col o r s ar e n o t guarante e d t o b e f as t ," s aid that y oung lad)" t,,' in g to suppress a laugh b e hind a v e ry white and dainty han d k e r c h i ef. STORY "It's time f o r th e m o rnin g s t o r y," s aid t e a c h er. "Form a c ircl e. That's it, c hil d r en. :'\J o\'e u p closer The small c hil d r e n c r o w ded n eare r t o te a c her and sat al e rt, eage rly waiting f o r th e s t o r y t o begin "Once upo n a tim e," b e gan teach e r th e r e lived in a far awa y countr y a trib e o f poor peopl e I n time of plenty th e y ha d barel y e n o u g h t o s uppl y t h eir ne eds, but in t h e tim e of famin e they w e r e desola te This y ea r th e r e came up o n th e lan d a wor s e famin e t h an h ad ever been b e f o r e a nd th e p oor peopl e w e r e unable t o co p e with it. i\l a ny of t hem starve d until at la s t th e r e w e r e o nly tw o c hil dren left. They r eso lv e d to l e a ve th e place o f ill-luck and t o see k th e ir f ortunes in anoth e r lan d The near es t pla ce wa s o v e r o n e hun d red miles away, and a s th e y ha d n o c art they had t o go on foo t. The path wa s l o ng and ston), a n d danger faced them at e ver y turn." Just then t e ach e r wa s attrac t e d b y a s mali h and waving in the air. W ell, T o mm)' ".'\w, t e a c h e r T d o n 't lik e tha t s tory I t' s to o sorrowful. Gee, T could t ell a b ette r o ne than that." T e a c h e r put awa y th e b oo k an d sat up with inte r es t, s a ying, G o ah e ad, T ommy T o mm y strutte d t o th e front o f th e r oo m l oo k e d pr o udl y at his s mall associat es a nd s tart e d his s tor y "On ce upo n a tim e th e r e wa s a pirat e chi e f nam e d T o mm y H e had a g r eat big pirate ship a n d lot s o f pirat es H e wa s v e r y s t r on g an d bra ve and his m e n w e r e afraid o f him c ause h e made th e m wa l k th e plank if t h ey w e r e bad. o f th e othe r s hip s came n e ar thi s s hip if th ey could h e lp it, c au se th e pirates r o bb e d th e m o f th e ir diam o nd s and m o n e), and th e n ha d big b o nfir es o n th e oce an M os t o f th e b oa t s c arri ed good things to ea t and d rink and t h e m e n a lwa ys searc h ed th e b oats and th e n too k awa y all th e goo d things T o mm y paused to see th e effec t o f his s tor y. Eve ryon e was watching him, e xc ept Jimmy, wh o

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3-l THE ZONIAN. was T ommy's worst enemy. H e just sat back in his seat and s neer ed Revenge is sweet, so from then o n Tommy made Jimmy the v illain o f his story "One as Captain T Olllmy was lo ok in g out to sea h e 'sp i ed a tiny sp::ck anj s:tid, Aha! 'ti s the Whit e Star sailing unJer Captain Jimmy' O'ertake h e r, m\' l ads. I n a short tim e they w e r e n ea r the s hip ani made it surrender. The n the pirate c h ie f his men just climbed on t h e oth e r s hip and took all the food and win e to th eir own ship. They m ad : all th e p eople walk the plank, but t h ey saved Captain J imm\ until last. The n ther hit Captain J immy wit h paddl es until h cr ie.! anl cr id, and then t hey threw him overboard and w e n t down to the dining rO::l111 t o eat and drink." \Y air a minute," interrupted tea c h er, "Jimmy, I don't believe YOli w e r e t h e l eas t atten-rion to Tommy's s t o r y. Come up h ere and see if you can finis h it. Oh, t hat overbearin g swagger as Jimmy too k the place of h o n or! Ir was the b es t time in th e w o rld t o show off b e fore his classmates and t o get even with Tommy. "Captain Jimmy was n 't s:::ared at all wh e n h e wa s thrown into t h e water H e was the bravest person H e j u s t swam around in the water and pick e d up all t h e p eop l e and put th e m o n t h e rVhite H e waited until th e pirates were all a slee p and t h e n h e c r ep t up o n th e ir s hip and lock ed th e m all in th e di nin g r oom. H e ti ed a big r o p e to th e pira te ship and towed it right to t h e city and gave it t o a police m a n. The judge locked all th e pirates up in jail a n d gave all th people on t h e IVhit e St", SIOO. An d was happy except th e pirat es." THE P O ISONED P IE. Hit,-ber: l lcCI.lin, 22. Bang! The iceb ox do::.r shut with a resounding c rash that all but tor e it from it s rusty hin g es HOh gee, mom," I whin ed "whe re'd t hat piece of pie go that I saved from supper?" H\\,h)', I b elieve Edna ate it thi s ITI3rnillg SJI1 Wh y don't you eat your pie at t h e table lik e th e rest of t h e famil y?" "Ah-oh Christmas-ever y tim e 1 save a -welll don't ca re-bu t f or th e l ove o f P e te, mom, that's ab out th e t enth tim e somebody took m y pie-every tim e J put it away-'en t h e n you try to encourag e m e to save. Fir s t it' s Ned, then Edna, and th e n it's th e baby. Wh y can't I eat my pie w h en I want to? And--" H u s h, t hat's e n o ugh. Now you go finish your h o m e work a n d th e n go to b ed StopI don't want to h e ar an o th e r word out of YOLI to n ig ht." I left to get my b::)Qk, mutte rin g vagu e. ominous t h reats a s I d i u so. Three days later J stooJ a l one in th e kit c h e n working at a large anJ inviting pie:::e o f pie, but I wasn't eating it. Reveng e n o w dwel t within my soul and crowded out all l esse r pas s ions. I lifted the upper cfuH anJ dug Ollt the leaving on ly the O'Jt.;r s h ell of min ce meat around the side. J picked up a bar of soa p and wit h a knife cut o ff enou6h thin slices to fill t h e cen ter of my masterpiece. Between t h e layer s o f soap [ put p e p per ; or I s h ould say I put th soa p la ye r s of Noone w.Jul d tak e m Jre than olle bit e o f that pie-I was sure. I l aid u pper cr u s t blc k a s it wa s v ery n ie':!ly, ani the pie in ice-box, [ w ent to wa r n th e fam i ly not to t o u c h it. as I did this every day, it was n othing unu sual. day w;"n I came h o m e [ l ookod into the ice-b:>x. The pie was s till th e re. The next day J a:5ain. Still there On th e third day it was gon e I all onr th e kitc h en t o b e sure, but it was g.:m e I walk e d in to th e r03Jl1 wh e r e m y m o t h e r was sewi ng "j\ 101l1." Y es." W her e i s m y piece of pie? " [ gJve i t to t h e col ored girl t his mJrning. [ t haJ been th e re f or seve ra l days and yo u didn't t:> want it." I W l S stumped but I had to satisf y m y cur i03ity, so I tri e d again. Did s h e lik it?" 1(1 supp33e s::>." I k ep t still for a m o m ent, then,"Did s h e say s h e did?" .. h e said somethin g abollt it b eing a littl e soapy, but s h e see med to lik e it."

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GAlLLARD CUT. N o z ...... >Z

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36 THE ZOc/ I AN. T C LA SS PROPHECY. I BRIOAL PARTY. JOHN KeLLER ROBERT GEnus AND LnE WOMACK GEORGIA E1.LSWOR'rH AND SUSIE ALLEN CLARA WOOD B est men .... B ridesmaids Bride Groom HARRY GRIER ArTER SIX Y EARS RUTH \\'11.50110', '20. CARLA SMITH, ''10. Piau, Poncharlrain, DlIroil, j\1ich. 8 p m., JIlIJ(, 1 926. PERSONAf.. FOWLER BANTON General handrm:tn to T. A. Edison SUSIE ALLEN Private secretary to R obert Getman ROBERT GETMAN .C hicago politician i\ IURO GOLDEN F ootball coac h ) Illinois JOHN KULLER B ishop of Panama GEORGIA ELLSWORTH General Man:tger, L ingerie Factory, T roy. N l", HARRY GRIER L awyer in Detroit i\IARIA HUNSECKER i\l etropolitan accompanist JASE CALVIT P hysical directress, Sargent School, l\'1nss. FRASCES THORNTON Washington society belle .!\LBERT THAYER ... American Consul to P anama CLARA WOOD RUTH WILSON WILLIS PRESSELL Ln.E WO\IACK ).tAR-rHA ZARAK \\'U.LIAM CHRISTIA"'MABEL LEE \\'ARRES JORDAN DAVID '\'EVII-LE ASSA SIRE FRASCEt; WEHBERG CARLA SMITH HUES Confidential secretar), to law firm of Grier & Browning Countess Felix Esperanza de Castillo F orest ranger, California Ranc her in Colorado, cartoonist (or POSI Ba cteriologist in Colorado Universiq' 2d baseman on Chicago White Sox Short stor), writer, summer h ome in t h e H awaiian I sbnds Scientific h orticulturist, expert grafter Minin g engineer, Chile Engaged to Willis Teacher of Frenc h and Spanish in Tallaha ssee, Fla Stage manager for Shakespearean plays in St. L ouis Kindergarten teacher in Ethical Culture School, New York City Enter Ruth, R obert, and L y le. Rulh speaks: Robert, did you remember to order that extra dozen o f roses? And those three d oze n littl e ca k es? And did yo u m ake sure t o t ell S u s i e and G eo rgia to b e h e r e at 8 o'clock s h arp? And--" Robert .-"Say, what d o you think I am? One at a time, please RlIth .-"W ell, good n ess I 'm so excite d I don't kn ow what to do! I h ope eve r y thing comes out all right and I ce rtainl y tru s t H arry didn t over look anyone whe n h e sent th e s umm o n s Lyle.-"No, h e did n't, be ca use I loo ked ove r t h e list m yself, so a thing lik e that w o uldn t happe n Harry surely th ought o f a dandy way o f fulfillin g his p l edge!" Roberl.-"D o you kn ow, it' s be e n s uch a long tim e s in ce th e banqu e t t hat I've alm os t forg otte n H arry's p l edge t o say n o thing of th e details H arry drew th e pledge b y lot, didn't h e Lyle?" L)'le. -"Yes, don't t ell m e you' ve f orgot t e n 'vVe h ad 23 blank s in e n velopes a nd o n the tw en t yf o urth was writt e n that pledg e w e w orked so h a r d ove r. I don't think I 'll ever f orge t it. I just bet I c an say it n ow." Roberl.-"W ell, what's sto pping yo u? Lyle.-"Nothing. H ere goes-'W e, th e clas s o f '20, do h e r e b y so l e mnl y bind ourse lv es to gath e r at your co mmand any tim e during the year, 19'16, at any p la ce whic h yo u may designate.' Now, say I can't r e m e mb e r things." RlIlh.-"Oh! F o r pity sa k e, se ttle dow n and tell m e w h at time it i s You ha ve n t g rown up a bit. Y ou're j u s t as bad as yo u wer e in high school." Robert.-uNo l ec tur es, Count ess It 's just 8 and --" Knock a t door RUlh.-"Oh, I w onde r who it i s N o w, don't eith er of you l e t t h e c a t out o f th e bag a nd wat c h m e above all things. Wh e n I wink exc u se yo urselves as soon as YOll ca n, but don't let anyo n e suspect." Another knock. RUIIt.-HH urry, L y l e, and see w h o it i s Ru th and R obert talk together in dumb s h ow. L y l e opens door. Ente r Frances Tho rn to n, Anna,

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THE ZONI AN. 37 and Willis .-"Wh y' just loo k who 's h e re. A r ea l Countess' May b e I was n't s urpri sed to get yo ur wedding annou n cement. H ow's the Count?" (Ruth and Willi s talk in dumb s how. Frances Thornton goes over to talk to R o bert, Anna goes toward L y l e.) Frances "Why, yes, I've h ad a good time these last 6 years." Robe rl .-"Yes, I can't eve n pick lip t h e I f/ashing/on Times without reading something about you. How do you lik e being a society b elle?" ( C ontinue t a l king in dumb s h ow.) Lyle (who h as been tal k ing in dumb s how to Anna).-"Wh y are you h iding your l e ft hand? Let's see! Oh --. Wh o i s he?" (.-\11 look at Anna. Anna blush es.) dlllla." Willi s will t ell you." fYillis.-"Give me your co ngratulati o n s b e cause I'm he Frallces.-"H ow did it happ e n?" (Talk together.) K noc k at door. Enter Fran ces Westb e rg Muro, and Mabel. Muro.-"How'dy, every b ody? L oo k whom I've b r oug ht! A budding yo u ng auth oress, a linguist and last, but, of course, not least, myself, football coac h f or t h e c hamp team of Illinois .rIn1Jfl,-"I s t hat w hat you've been doing all th ese years?" Muro. -"Yes, part o f t h e time Frances Thor n ton's b ee n having the career, and ( wa lk s to Ru t h ) Ah! C ountess F e lix E s p e r anza de Castillo ( bows ) I believe (Ruth and Muro talk.) lYillis.-"And you, Fran ces \\" J what have yo u been doing?" Frances ff/. -"Oh Try ing to drill French and Spanish into F l or ida high sc h oo l students' h eads I pity i\1iss Frost if we were ever s uch a trial to h er. Bu t how about you? Y o u 've b een out west h a ven' t you?" I f'illis -"Yes, for the last 3 yea r s R ece ntl y, I've been trying my h and at forest ranging. The r e's Mabel and Ruth with t h e ir h eads close togeth er. \\'hat have you been doi ng, Getman?" Roberl .-"Hum! A Chicago politician, at your serv i ce. But that's nothin g to the tal es i\Iabel ca n tell you o f t h e HulaHu la girls in H awaii. How a bout it, Mabe l?" jVJabel "Now, Robert, you know 1 haven' t be e n t e llin g you a t hin g about Hul aHul a g irl s I've never even seen a n y, I've been too busy writ ing." Muro .-"W ell, if M abel hasn't written about t hem, L y l e's cartoons in th e Denver Post have certainl y s hown t hem tru e to life Eh, L y l e?" L yle. -"Oh--." ( L o u d knock. Enter Maria, J ane, H elen, Albert, and W arren.) Maria (laug h ing)-"W ell, this certainly seems l ike o l d times. Y ou can't guess the n e ws I've brought. Pinky's the Ame rican Consul to Panama!" dlberl.-"Hum' That's a much more dignified position t h an ban g ing on the piano all day for poetic song birds Yan e ( to everyone, in surpri se) Why, of all things. VVhen did you all arrive? H ello, Frances \Yestberg. How ha s t h e world been lIs ing YOll, t hese last 6 years?" Frances / Y. -"Oh I've b ee n teaching sc h ool as I always said 1 would. \\'hat have you gone in for?" ]ane .-"Teaching, too, and J've certainly had my hands full, trying to make fat girls thin and thin girls fat ( G oes to Anna ) "A nd what's Anna been doing?" (Talks to Anna in dumb s h ow.) Helen ( w h o ha s be e n talking in du mb s how to Willi s). l" es, inde ed! I've b ee n busy' Kinder garten c h ildren aren't particu l arly fond of lesson s in m ora ls." ( Continues talking to Willi s ) Roberl ( w h o h as b ee n talking to Warren)" Don't t r y to tell me t hat you've been working. W eeding garden beds i sn't work." tYarn.'JI. H u h Lot you know about horti culture. All j've got to say i s t hat it takes m ore b r ains than it does to b e a politician." ( Looks toward and Alb e rt, who are laug h ing ) What's t h e joke, Tell us so we can laugh too." dlbcrl. -"Oh' Mabe l was just trying to make me believe --" Knock at door. RlIth. -"Oh R o bert. (Be c kons to him and winks at Lyle. They exit ) dlbe rl ] bet that's Billy." Enter\Villiam, l\ i art ha,Carla, Dav i d,a nd Fowler. N/jlliam. H ello, what's that about me, Pinky?" (Speaks to A lbert in dumb s h ow. ) Frances Th orn/on / 0 Caria. "O h Carla, darling, you haven't c hange d a bit . l\nd,l\1artha, it does me good to see you again. Did you com e together?"

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THE ZO:\I.\:\ . yes! Carla got o n the train at t. Louis and we\-e talked every minute of the way since." Carla.-":\Ianha's been trying to con\'ince me o f the of teaching bacteriology, but let me direct Shakespearian plays any day. \\" e met Da\'id and Fowler and Bill downstairs and theY\'e deafened us with their chatter abollt mining and electricity and Billy is determined that there's nothing like baseball." .ilbal.-"\Yell, I can't sa" I agree with him. I'd much rather attend a tea than throw around baseballs in the scorc hing sun." Frallce< TIIOrJ/IOII. "Oh, that's all "err well, but] know something YOLI don't knQ\\." ,1Ibt'rl.-"Oh what?" ,I/nrin .-"Hurry Upl T ell us l 7nlli".-'This suspense is dreadful. (:\11 try to urge Frances to hurry and tell h er secret.) FrallceJ.-"\\'e ll, I think .-\nna and W illis ha d better come up front since it par/icll/ali.\' concerns them." 111I1n.-"Oh --" f/'illis,-''';,ow --" Fowlll' ,-"Oh! I bet I can guess!" Dnt.'id.-"L ooks if appearances speak for al1\'thing." FroJlus.-"Then I guess I can't tell you after aiL" ( H olds up -\nno' s left hand. ) Isn't it a beaut)'?" j\Jllro.-"IYell, I should sar! (All gath er around Anna and lI'illi s,) j\Jnbel.-"II' ha's keeping H arr)" an)' way? H e certainly wou ldn't playa joke on us!" lI'edding march is heard. Helell.-"II h)' that's H ere comes t h e brid e !'" ( All l oo k ed surpri sed. Enter bridal part)'.) / 1 /nritl, "II' hr, lookat J o hnn y!" (Allstarean d step back, f o rming an ope nin g through whic h t h e bridal part) march es.) Curlain. SCENE II. A.t rise o f curtain all are giv in g co ngratulations. .-\11 stop talking and sing: F .\RE\\ELL. ( D edic.ned to the Class of' 19) .\ir: Till We ),Ieet Again. There's a thrill in the hearts or t h e Senio r s Oi love tor 010 B a lb oa High For the work we have done, The friends we h:we won, \ s rhe Senior Cia'>S whispers good-br. CHORUS \\'c'll smile [ h e while we bid adieu to you, : \ s the rear., rol! by we'JI thi nk of yo u 4.nd Oll r heart:> will sti l l be tru e To the mcm'ries shrilled in you. Smile .:n
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THE 39 I e S T OCKI:"ICS. T I I :.1;----The Class or 1920 made its bow to the public in "Green Stockings,":t clever of English lik) b y A. E. \\', IVf asol1, with t h e following cast of charac ters: Celia Faraday Madge ()I rs. Rockingham) Evelyn ( LadrTrenchard) Phyllis Faraday r..l rs Chisholm Faraday {Aunt I da} Col onel J o hn Smith William Admir:ll Grice Roben Tarver Henry Steele James Ral eigh ([ he butler) ),1 \SEL LEE CI.AkA \\'OOD Ht"S.,ECKER CARI,A SMITH \\'11.1.1., PItF;SSEI.L JOHN "ULI.ER G OLDE:,\ -\LBERT THAYER ROIlERT GEnIA:-' \\'\I,lI"," CHRISTIA>': l),wlO :'\'f.XILLE The play derives its title from an old Engli sh custom of rn:lking an elder unmarried daughter wear green stockings:It the wedding of her younger sister. Celia Faraday, the leading lady, a young woman of vivid irnaginatio n and a keen sense of humor, really a c harming girl if ever anyone had taken the trouble to look at her, became of being the person who sees to eve rything but whom nobody sees, w h o i s necessary to everybody's comfort but to nobody's pleasure, and is openly pitied and passed by, because, forsooth, her younger sister s have married before h er. \\'hen Phylli s, the pretty and frivolous youngest sister fretted because she would not be allowed to annOllllce her engagem e n t since her o ldest s ister remained unmarried, and even referred to the fact that Celia must for the third time put o n green stockings at a sister's wedding, and I\l r. f.araday openly c hafed because as long as his eldest daughter remained unmarried, he could not shut up his establishment and live at his club, t h e iron of injustice entered Celia's soul. Arriving hom e unattended and findin g t h e famil y ru e fully discussing her painful pos ition, and seeing that if it were but possible to announce her engagement the family would feel t h e disgrace wiped au t, s h e rose to the occasion and invented a lover and an engagement, though to h erself and to :\unt Ida she confided that it would be to kill the imaginary lover at t h e end o f month s. Even Cindere lla was not !'nore transformed. The family s howered attentions upon h er. Everyhody basked in the light of her countenance and her slightest wish was anticipated. :\11 the eligible men of their circle, old middle-aged, and young, to outwit the others and ha ve a word with her privatcl\'. Celia had com e into h el' own and even' body' acknowledged h e r c harm anclloveabl e n e;s. For H months s h e reigned a queen. Then came the announcement in Th e Times o f the death of Colonel J o hn Smith, Somaliland, "of wounds. Octobe r 11." Consternation se i zed upon the fam ily. But their grief was /lot a selfis h contemplati o n of shattered h opes} but a real sympath y for her in her sorrow. However, Cel ia, h e r o ically decided that the death o f her fiance whol11 t h e famil" h ad n e ver see n s hould not be allow e d to interfere with the routine. She would soo n hide hersdf and her grief in Chicago, but in the m eantime d o her part in securing Bobby Tan'er's e l ec tion to Parliament. :\.t this juncture Colonel Smith's friend, Colonel avasoul', appeared wit h a card bearing Colonel Smith's dying m essage to Celia. Then was re\'ealed a complication o f which Celia never dreamed. Some kindly disposed m embe r o f the family had mailed C e lia' s first love letter to the imaginan' J o hn Smith and so me real J o hn Smith had received it. Quickly seeing his advantage)and ruthless ly holding to it, Col o n e l \'avasour p layed his part until t h e ti m e for revealing t h e fact t hat Colonel "avasour and Colond Srnith were identical arrived. That Celia s h ou l d make her engagement entt:rl.'d into in jest, an engagement carried out in earnest, was the only course open to her, and and inclination see med coincident. "Green Stockings" was put o n at Panama, Corozal, Cristobal, Culebra, Gatlin, Ft. S herman, Ft. Amador, Coco Solo. and Balboa, eac h time with great success Lee in the part of Celia, the unnoticed girl who at last came into her own, was charming.

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-lO THE ZO:\II\:\. Sh e in t erpre ted h e r difficult part with under stand ing and executed it with ease a n d grace C o l o n e l J o h n Smith Ya v asour wa s e x celle ntl y s h o wn by \\'illis P ressell wh o played to p e rf ec ti o n th e part o f a f rie n d loyal t o th e de a d y e t with an e y e t o h is own a dvantage The fashio nabl e, ease-l o ving, self-ce nt e r ed fath e r i\lr. Far aday, was e na c t e d by J ohn Kull e r. I t see med so n atura l that h e s h a uld h a \"e his desi r es gr a tifi ed th a t w e could see at a gl a n ce h o w incon s i de rat e and selfis h it wa s t hat C elia s h o ul d keep him fr o m living at his club thro u g h th e failu re t o find him a suitable so n in law Funlovin g Hunsec k e r fitt ed in to th e part of prett)', th oughtless Phyllis d y ing to ann o un ce h e r e n g agement with B o bb y Tarv er, an d vex ed with C e lia f o r see ming t o s tand in h e r wa)'. ."1s a young Englis h s w ell o f limite d m entalit)' and unlimite d selfis hn ess Alb e r t Thayer score d a gr eat s u ccess The tw o in the s ublim e un co nsc i o u s n ess o f utte r selfishness b o ught o ut much lau ghte r. Carla Smith pla yed a goo d -\unt Ida, th e only o ne wh o r e ally saw C e lia and w h o m Celia had to take into th e sec r e t o f h e r unbearable p o s iti on. L o yall)' Aunt Ida k ept th e sec r e t o f the shadowy C o l o nel Smith, sent th e t e l egram t o Th e Time s whi c h made him "die of wounds at Berbera" and wit h equal loyalty and ardor, mourned hi s d eath in a rea l istic attack of hysterics. The parts of the two s uccessfully married sisters, Madge and Evelyn, we r e tak e n by F rances Thornton and Clar a Wood, resp ectivel y and most creditabl y done. The tender-hearted, bluff o l d sea dog, Admiral Grice was g i ven splendidly by Muro G o lde n and the two young men abollt town, glad to s ee and wO'5hip Celia w h en they really s aw h er, we;-e interpreted by Robert Getman and Willi am Christian. David Neville made a splendid but:e r, and played h ,s part wit h such d ignity anj as wou l d make him a treasure in an y famil y The play of 1920 h as be e n a succe ss. All th e people gr e w into th eir part s a n d gave them with a n unde r s tanding, g r ace, and naturalness which refle cted muc h credit upon t h e mselves a n d their class advi s er, i'1cKeivey, upon w hom also has d e v e l oped t h e task of their training. Only th ose c o n c ern e d in t h e preparation and g iving of a high school p la y have any conception of the hard w ork and fun connected with it. H o nor to t h e Clas s of 1920 and their adviser!

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CO LON. N o % :; Z

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41 THE ZO:\"IA:\" Slu ; e AI/tn, 20 THE TR IP TO TH E PEARL ISLANDS Than k sgivi n g day will l o n g b e r e m embe r ed b y t h e Class o f 2 0 They no t only e njoyed t h e u s u a l activitie s o f t h a t day bu t al so a d e ligh t f u l t rip t o th e P e arl I s l a n d s The part y left B alboa a t 2.30 a.m. Andab ou tfi,'eh o u r slate r t h e y lande d and wer e pre p aring a h earty breakfa s t Durin g the d ay many e njoyed t h e mselves swimming, boa ting, and e xp l o rin g t h e i s lan d S e v e r a l o f th e part)' we r e successful i n pu r c hasing so m e good pearls fro m th e natives o f t h e vill age. A r egular p i cnic l un c h was p r e pare d with t h e a ssist a n c e o f mith and i\liss i\l c K e l v ey, who proved to b e e x celle n t coo k s : "lte r a l ig h t supper th e r emainde r o f t h e prov i s i o n s w e re divided am o ng t h e n a tives. I t wa s th e n time to s t a rt f o r h o m e and oon t h e p art y b a d e ad i e u to t h e i s l a n d . -\t 10.30 th e b oat doc k e d at B alb o a, and, a l thou g h tired, e v e ryon e wa s h e ard to s a y t h a t th e trip w as o n e t hat w o u l d alway s b e r e m e m be r ed. THE SENI O R HALLOWE' E N PARTY. The Cl ass o f '2 0 h e ld a delightful Hallowe' e n party a t th e h o m e o f Carla Smith. The h o u s e w as t as t e full y decorated f o r th e oc ca s i o n with witc h es g o b Ii 11 s pumpkins, an d o th e r r e ali stic decorati o n s f o r s u c h a party. Those in costume b o ked t h eir pr e tti est a n d it was mu c h fun trying to g u ess who th ey w e r e The regula r Hall o w e'e n games s u c h a s du c kin g f o r apples and pieeatin g con tests w e r e pla yed. Aft e r a dainty lun c h eo n the m erry m a k e r s g a th e r e d a r o und a wit c h fir e and her e to l d many wond e rful gh os t tal es an d sang old so ng s The n H o me Sw eet H o me" w as pla yed an d e v e ry o ne l e ft s a ying that th e eve n ing wa s a m os t ple a sant o n e. THE F"A.C LTY I'ARTY. On St. Valentin e s e v e ning th e C l ass of'20ente rtain e d th e f ac u l t y at t h e h o m e o f M a ria H u n s e c k er. iVluc h c r edit mu s t b e g iv e n t o th ose w h o h e lp e d d ecorate th e h o m e so pre ttil y A ver y p leasant e v e nin g wa s s p ent and man y inte r -

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T H E 20:\1 -":'\. 4 3 estin g games w ere p layed f or w h ic h the W lIlilers w ere c rown ed king :ln d q ueen o f t h e evening. T he singing game in wh ic h each p e r son was obliged to w r i t e a verse to some f ami l iar tune and sing it bef ore t h e audience, was most interesting. : \ (rcr t h e progra m the girls asked to searc h f o r little arrows which were h idden about t h e h o u se. i\ I r. was c hosen auctioneer a n d w ith t h e arr ows r h e g irls bid o n t h e w h o w ere to b e thei r par t ne r s d u ring r h e lunc h eon. \Yhen each girl had her partner and had seated t h e mselves com fortab l y. a oaint)' luncheon was served. The party waS considered a real success. CHRI S T)L-\S Mi ss Frost was kept pretty busy receiving wonderfu l pac k ages for m an' days befo r e t h e eventful eveni n g. Th ese packages were t h e gifts w h ich were to be hung on the C hristmas t ree. f.in ally t h e n ig h tarrived and i n d u e time t h e girls and w i t h t h eir parents made their appearance in t h e beautifully decorated .'\ssembly H all. The following program was well applauded: P iano selection Ethel B rad) P iano selection Ethcl Getman Reading-Tht Chri sJll;OS Carol Carla SIT!ith Reading-Tht Ha:in g o j ValianJ W illis \"ocal soh-7llsJ ..fwrtU)'I11 {or You la rgaret : \I/en ( Elsie Sundqui::.t, Trio (two violins and piano) Cornelia van Il arde\'eld l Ethel Getm :1Il L iving pictures: Three \\,ise : \ dor:nion of the Wise P eace o n Earth (Catherine Parmeter Catheline Campbell I Carla Smith ( .. \ nna B oyd Carla Smith Cathetinc Parmeter Catherinc Campbel Afte r th e program San ta with his p ack over h is s h ou lder appeared and his only excuse for g i ,'i ng s u c h wonderful g i fts w as t hat the war was over D u ncan made u p splendidly as Santa, as s h e has a pleasant way and jolly face to take t hat part. The audience enjoyed vc r y much the witty remarks and compliments passed by h er during the e\"ening. \\' h en the gifts we r e dis tributed it was time to go home, and all left fee l ing pleased with their new gifts. PARENTS' RECEPTlO='. The Domesti c Scie n ce rooms of the B a l boa H ig h Sc h ool were prettil y decorated for t h e reception given by the faculty and students to t h e parents. A \'ery successful prograrn which conof piano and violin numbers, vocal solos, and reading was carried out. The paren ts appeared m u c h pleased and t h e reception was considered a true s u ccess F.\RE\\-ELL RECEPTIO:\" TO )orR. ;\\.-\:\":\"I:\"G. T he facult), and studen t body entertained most delig htfull y at a reception given i n h o n or of :'Ir. :' Janning. The receiving committee saw to it that everybody was acquainted and c omfortable. i\Iany beautiful piano and vio lin numbers we r e rendered. 1\11'. 1\l:1nning was mu c h s urprised with t h e t raveling bag presented to him by the facand students, and a lso p leased with t h e spirit i n which it was g iven, \\'e know t hat we shall long remember i\[anning a n d hope t hat t h e traveling bag will h e l p to keep u s in his memory. TilE JL":\"IOR O.\:\"CE. T he dance given by t h e Juniors on t h e 9th of April was well attended and was con s i dered a g reat success. This dance was given in order to raise I"noney [Q h e l p toward t h e publication of THE 20NIA". \"rig h t's orc h estra furnis hed th e music and e\'erybody seemed to have enjoyed t hemselves.

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THE ZO:\, I A:\,. i o-\THLETICSo Da::id '20. For 9 Years the Zone high schools h"oe participated to a degree in athletics. Athletic interest and abili"o have steadily increased, probably induced by increased attendance. Last year left a notable mark on our escutc heon, the lightweight basket ball championship of Panama and the Zone, which feat, up to date of publication, wegive no promise of equalingo : \ thletics received a sc\'cre reverse in the first semester when some of our athletes were barred from school and class activities for the semester. They undertook a h oliday on the anniversary of armistice day, which unfortunately was not a l ega l holida)o. The Freshman class brought litrle material this year which could be utilized to replace Copeland, Brumb y, \\' arson and i\i anassa, so the return of Golden and U. S. A., was welcomed. succession of obstacles prevented the interclass meets and competitive athletics we ha ve heretofore held, and the sc hool was forced to vent its energies in gymnasium and swimming. These logically seem to be b etter for the school as a whole, than a number of teams, as a star basketball player in the seat next to you is not necessarily co nducive to good digestion. B.\ .... KET B.\LL. Basketball is still our most popular sport. This year's team has not taken the popular fancy as did last year's, although a vociferous mob of rooters hav e turned out to almost every game, who made up in lung capacity what they lacked in numbers and to whom the t eam tenders it s thanks. Y ou will see by the following scores, in order of their dates, that 5 games h3\ o e bee n played with but {JJ1C l oss, to Cristobal Hi gh: Balboa :"1. Balhf);l S,heJ()1. \\'on, 11 4.1. Cri .. toballllgh School B:tlh():1 Schc.ol. \\" on, 11 18. Crj .. School (IS. Balboa Iligh School. l.ost,11 q. Cri .. tobal J IIllh School ps. Balboa High School. \\'on, 8-15. Balboa \;01\'011 P atrol "S. Balboa Iligh School. \\'on, 6-26. Christian was our leading scorer with Golden and Kuller do ing the h eav)" work in t h e fieldo CR ISTOBAL HIGH SCHOOL \'5. BALBO.\ H I GH. The series of three games with Cristobal H igh were as fast and clean as co uld possibly be desired. The teams were closely matched, Cristo b a l playing a steady dependable game in all t h ree, and the same could be said of Balb oa, but for their s h ooting which at tim es was wild in the extr eme. Crh!obn!. Searc;, f. Raym ond, f I-Icnter, c :\1. D orle, g. H:trrison, g. F erguson, f. P. D oyle, f Balboa. Golden, f. Christian, f. Kuller,c, ;\i :massa, g. Ne\rille, g. S'Jbstiwfes for B:tlbo:t: L:tnders, g.; J ordan, g.; Getman. piek! goals-Sears 4, Rarmond 3, H enter 3, Christian 10, G olden I, Kuller, J. Foul go:tis-.'\1. D oyle. Reteree-l\lr. Hughes. Scorer-Grobe. Cristobal. Sc:trs, f. .-II. Dorle, r. Solomon, c. H aymond, g. H elltcr,g. H arrison, g. SECOND GAME. Balboa. Christian, f. f. Kuller, c. ;\leville, g. Lander s g. Substitutes for Balboa-Getman, g.; JOidan, g Field goals-Sears, H enter 5, Christian "1, 2, Kuller, Landers. F oul goals-Sears, Christi:tn 2. H ughe s. Scorer-Grobe Cri;tobal. Sears, f. \1. Doyle, f. S')lomon, c. R aymond, g. H arrison, g. I T enter, c. THIROGO\\IE. Bnlboa. Golden, r. Christi:tn, f Kuller, c Neville, g. Landers, g.

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TH E ZO;.J I A:,\. 45 Substitutes for Balboa-Getman, g.; J ordan, g. Fiel d goa ls-Scars 3, Golden 2, Christian J. Kuil er, L amler<;. F oul goals Sears, H enter, Golden. R efcree ;\ l r. Scorer -Grobe. B.bEBALL. QUI' ex p e riment i n base ball was rarllcr tentative but netted good results. THE Capwell, c; p (Clpt:lln) Landers,I\t; K elly, .!d; Christian, 55; Pena, 3d; Golden, I; Fahj, :'\c\'dle, Br own, ;\l o non, outfield. The following games were played: B alboa shops 1 0 B alboa H S C ri stob:d High School Balboa H S. Pedrol\liguelm:trriedmen 0 B albo:l. H. S Pedro married men Balboa 1-1. S OTHER ACTI nTIES. T ennis h as come into popularity this rear and so rnany have b eco m e interested t hat a tourll3-rnent i s bein g projected. Burkholder has made a cOJ'nJ"ncndable s u c cess of the gymnasium and twice a week a liv e ly class spend some profitable h ours there, .\QL-\TICS. This year's swimmers have h eld no officia l meet nor played any gam es as a high sc h ool unit, but water-pol o and oth e r water sports in the regular r outine o f swimming class is developing so m e deep c h es ted strong winded ath letes, \\ ith truly ] rish perception and self r elia n ce in a sc rim mage. TR.-\CK. The H igh School h eld their annual interclass track meet on Saturday, A pril 10. 'Thanks to the abi lity o f their girls th e Juniors won t h e meet. Ethe l Getman, J unior, and \\' illiam Christian, Scnior, wcre fir s t and second hi g hest scorers and captured fir s t in ever y event t her entered. added 30 and 25 respectiv e ly to the points of th eir classes. B oys. Seniors .. 6 .1 Juniors ]S Sophomores --Fre:.hTllt!1l loo-)'ord dash. W. Christian, time, 10'4 seconds (Senio r). L. L a n ders (Junior ). \\T. J o rd a n (Senio r ). T otal. 6, --+-I0-_rard ,Iflsh. \\. Christian, time, Sl5 .. ecomJ:. tSenior'_ \\. Jordan (Sen i o r). L. \\-omack (Senio r). 22o-.rord dlUIi. \\'. Chri:.tian, time,:4 sCl:olllb, (Sen1or'. I.. L anders (juniu r ). \\'. Jordan (Senior). l-hgh 71t111p. R. Getman, h eight,s fc:C't (Sen1or) L. L anders (junior\. T. f..:napp ( J uniorL k,ftnlllng Br'vtl.l :lulllp. \\'. disLlIlce, 1-feet (Se1l1orl. F '\1c.\I.lhon (juniorl. H. German {Senior Shot PilI. L. L anders, dist.tnce, 16 feet H 1llches ( Seni o r ). J ,,"uller ( Senior/. I.. \\'omack (Se nior ) Standing Brolld 7umJ.. \\'. Chr;stian, 8 feet 6 ilH:hes (Sen101). p .\lc;\I.lhon (junior). L. (junior). -I-I-o--,'ord Selll ors (\\'. Jordan, L. \\'omack, F B "llton \\. Christian.) J uniors ( L. Landers, C. Campbell, T. "-napp, F. The J uni ors are again \'icronous, winning t h e Tennis Tournament with a total o f 2 5 points. The Seniors were second with I J points, the Fres h men t h ird with 5 points. and t h e Sophomores fourth wit h I point. El o i s P earson and L eonard Lander s w e re the main point winn e rs for t h e ir class as t hey rook first pla ce in all events. B oys' S1I1.'{lo. 1. I.. I. ander::. (junior). 1. Rohe Getman (Senior' 3. \\ m. Sargent lSop homorel Gir/;' Siu'{ln !. El ois Pearson (Junior) ::. J ane Calvit (Senior). J Ethel Brady ( heshm an). Boys' Doubles. I. E Brady and L. Lander s (ju1l1or ) :t. \"'. Christian and \\'. Pr essell ( SenIor).

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46 THE zm-nAN. GirIJ' Douhln. I. E. Pearson :lnd E. Getman (Junior) '2. Ethel Br:tdr and Arb Green (Freshmen). 3 Jane Cah;t and Ctrl.l Smith ( Senior ) J \ [ixed Doublu. I. Iois Pearson and L. Landers (Junior ). J ane Cal "it and R obert Getman (Senio r ). J. ;\. C l ifton and Aria Green (Freshme n ) GIRLS' :\THLETICS. Frmlus ,\1. ,res/burg '2 0. Janet, what are t h e high sc h oo l girls going to do, now t hat school is closed?" asked Janet's mother. Thi s influenza epide mic mar last for severa l weeks " \Y ell, we were s upp osed to have a track meet 20) but we didn't get e n o u g h practice so I don't know when the track m ee t will b e h e ld. \Y e are going to have o ur int e rclass t e nnis tournament during Eas ter week. Thi s CQunts f or t h e silve r cup which i s given to t h e c la ss whic h wins the most points received fro m basket ball, tennis, track meet, aquatic meet. etc.," answered J anet nearly out of breath, as s h e se ldom said so much at one tim e "\\'ho won first place in basket ball? asked J anet's moth er, w h o was very muc h inter ested in h e r daughter. "The J uniors won firs t place, th e S e niors second place, the Freshies won third place The F res h ies and Sophomor es were tied f o r the third place, and another game was played and the Freshi es won. H the Fres hies had only had the team work that they had in the last f ew games, I think they w o uld hav e won second place, or even firs t pla ce. i\lother, ther showed m ore imprm e m e nt than any o f the oth er teams; even if I am a Senior and sar so. ,\5 for the aquatic meet, that ha s b ee n set for April 2... They had a girls' preliminary meet but that didn't count f or t h e c Up,so none of t h e Senior girls into it. O h ['m so s leepy," s aid J a net yawning. W ell, daughte r you'd b etter go to b ed Bu t pleas e tell m e, who was the r eferee in your ba s ket ball games," said \ '. "AI\ right m other, ['II go to bed in a minute First we h ad i\l i ss R obi n son, t h e n i\lr. Attaway, the n Burk h o lder. W e all liked Burkh older's refereeing. \Y e h ad f e w e r q u arrels whe n h e r e f ereed a n d we enjoyed th e games ever so mu ch. X o matter who th e referee was, w e enjoyed t h e games all t h e sa m e. "\\'e ll, good night," said J a net kissing her m o ther. The n ex t m o rnin g J anet woke up ate her breakfast a n d read t h e Slar a nd H erald The headlin es said that the ban wa s lifted and sc h ool would start i\1onday m o rning. Three noti ces we r e see n i\1o nda y afternoon on the front bla c k board. "The athletic m ee t will will b e h eld April 10," "The tennis tournament, April 17," and "The swimming rneet, April '24." A s Janet arrived h o m e her moth e r exclaimed How late YOLI are, Janet. " Y es, [ am quite late, but they have decided on the days f o r t h e athletic meet, tennis tournament, and the swimming m ee t. So I was out to practi ce running hig h and broad jumping," sa id J a net puffing, a s s h e was still over h eated.

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THE ZON I AN. 47 I $ I Qlxcbangc) I \9 I i .\furia HrmucJ:tr, '20. I II; \ V e are sorrYJ to say t hat not many exc han ges h ave b ee n r ece i ved. This might b e d u e t o th e high cost of pape r W e would w elco m e m ore comments from oth er papers. W e acknowl ed ge with thanks th e follo wing exc h anges: The /lrgomlUf, i\lansfidd, i\bss. /Jfr gus (3ar d ner, i\l ass. Canar y and B lue, Allentown, Pa. ClaJJic um-Qgden H. S. J Ogden, U t.lh. Commtru Life-H. S. or Commerce, Columbus, Ohio. Tht Em-l). : rrailur-Essex Count}' Training School, Law_ r ence, Mass. F/oridaHtlJllbeall, T a llaha ssee, Fla Tht Ileadlight-Garfield J unior H. S., R ichmond, In d. H. S. lIertlld, W esttield, II. S. Rtcordtr, Saratoga Springs, Z\. Y. John l \.f flrshal/ R etord, R ichmon d, Va. TMLincolniall-Lin coln H. S., Tacoma, W ash. Tht Lookoul, Oerb). C on n M aroon and I/'hi tt"-Uniontown H. S., Uniontown, P a. Th e !dicromeJtr-Ohio i\lech anics I nstitute, Cincinnati, Ohi o Tl:e J\.1issile-P e tersburg H. S., P ete r sburg, \ 'il Th e Nohlemall-';..;oble and Green oug h School, B oston, Mas:;. The Reflector-J ackson H igh and Intermediate School J ack so n, Mi ch. The Rt'view-Cenlr:ll H. 5., \\'a<;hington, D C. H. 5., Sp3rtanburg, S. C. 'TII: Sentinr/-Ounbar T owns hip H. S L eisenring; Pa. Th e Spec/a for-Trenton H 5 T renton, N. J. Stamped/-H avre i\l ollt T/:e Sfldoll-H olmes H S., Covington, K}'. TIlt: S tudent, Oklahoma H C;., Oklahoma City, Okla. T M T aj, H :lrrisonL urg, \ ;t. Tlte II'ukly } pJi Selll Y pSIlanti i\l i ch. Il"n t ward Ho--W este.rn 11. 5., B:llt imore, lIyndonian-\\'ind h:un H S., Will imantic, Conn OUR OPi NION OF OTHr:RS. j II; Class;cum Ogden H S., Ogden, t:lh. Your school to be vcr}' Illuch .live Y ou h:lve sn:r.pp}' societ), notes :lnd s n :lppy sportS :lnd fine jokes. H oweve r, we t hink:l few more cartoons would imprrve your papel. Senillul-D unbar H. S., L e i se nring, P a. Your article, "Ponra}':ll of t h e !\'orth Americ.11l I ndian i n American Literature," is Your exc h a n ge department i s good too Liu(olnian-L incoln H S., T acom.l, W ash Why don't you put all your jokes under o ne heading? Y o ur p oe ms are vcr)' attra ctive. \faroon and !rltile-Uniontown H 5., Un iontown P,I. W e certainly enjoy your paper. W e like your literary and ex cha n ge departments especiallr Studoll-Oklahoma H 5., Oklahoma City, Okla. Y O llr paper is neatly and artisti.:.d l}' arran ged, but don't rou think pictures and cartoons w o uld improve it? II'),,,,lolliall-\\'rndham 1-1. S., W illima nt ic, Conn. Y o ur pa per is very wdl bal:tnced. EXCHANGE HUl\I OR. H arold. "Why is a kiss over th e telephone lik e a str aw hat?" HnI'1J, .-"B ec aus e it i s n't felt."-1\ 1aroon (Jnd WI,ite. Blltcher.-"Com e, J o hn, br e ak t h e bones in 1\lr. \ Villiams' c hops and pu t Mr. Smith's rib s in th e basket. ]olm.-"AII right, as soon as 1 finis h sa wing off Mrs. Murphy's leg." H e (after popping yo u c rying, dearest? propo s al ?/J the qu estio n)-"Wh)' Did T offe nd b y are m y Slte .-HOh, n o, dear; it' s not that. 1 am cryin g for pure joy. 1\l o ther ha s always told m e I was s u c h an idi o t t hat T wouldn t get even a donkey for a s weetheart, and n o w I've got one after all." A certain sign sa id: Don't g O elsew h ere t o be c heated; co me in here."

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THE ZO:--1I ':":\ Joe R llby ,-"\Yh,' do they h,,'e kll o t s 011 th e ocean instead of miles?" Bob L;II/e,-"\\" e ll, you see the,' couldn't h,,'e t h e ocea n tid e if they didn't ha,'e knots," Bob Pfflsf.-"I could kiss you if we were not in a canoe," SIIe.-"Sir! Take m e ashore immediately." :\TOTICE-lf you eat h e r e o nce you will never eat anywhere else. THE ROAD TO SUCCESS. Earl y [Q b ed, early to r i se W o r k like t h e dickens, a n d advertise :\ BR IGHT SL':--'"y DAY l ;\f PAl\'!\i\I:\, .-lIbel" S. Br ownill:. 'Twas:t dark and sronll\' night; The SUIl fose slowly Ollt of rhe west; I t rained all day that night; And the moon was shining it's best. The thunder was t"inklin g all around: The stars falling t hick and bstj The wind was blowing straight up and down: And the snow felt with a might}" bl:tst. The s hore was washing over th e wave s; The sea s h ells cn'ing something terrific; The weather l oo k ed on in a s teady gne, A n d the lig h ming was vcry pacific. A rainbow came o ut, l ooking its best, A s though (0 outdo t hcm all. The world straightened out :l.nd was once more at rest, And t hat wa s the end o f the sq uall.

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THE ZONIAN. 49 Ru t h /I /ilsOIl, '20. Ouralul11l1i c olumn i s growing sorapidly and ea c h p e r so n i s d o ing s u c h sple ndid things, that it woul d take pages to g i ve e a c h full c r ed it. -But j u s t bel o w are so m e interesting fact s ab o ut so m e of our inte resting peopl e Ste wart N I c l?arlan e o f 1 8 ha s wander e d into f o r e ign fie ld s and i s s tudying hard in Edinburgh, S cotland Margaret Campbe ll, wh o graduate d la s t year, i s atte nding sc h oo l in Tallahassee, Fla, s p ec iali z ing in languages Fro m all r e p orts s h e i s d o ing sple n didl y Hartma n Steven s wh o graduate d in 1 9 16, will finis h his 4-years in R e nssela e r Poly t echnic T n stitute in June Besides b e in g v ice pre sid ent o f his clas s h e h o ld s se ve ral othe r important offices H o w e v e r h e find s tim e to b e l o n g t o and take an a ctive part in three frat e rnal o r g ani z ati o n s Afte r h e gra duates, Hartman i s g oing ba c k t o R e nssela e r f o r a d e gree in e lectri c al e ngineering Julia Nielsen, o f l as t ye ar' s cl a ss, decided t o ve ntur e int o t h e r e alm s o f m a trim o n y and was married recendy to N Ir. L. Hartman. Paul \Varn e r a 1 9 1 5 graduate i s in C olumbus Ohio, taking private lesson s pr e para to r y to enter ing Carnegi e Institute in th e fall. W e have th e Frase r famil y w ell l ocated, a nd fro m reliabl e sources w e find \ Villiam 'I.h in Tampico, l V r e xi co, with an oil company a s a c i v il e ngineer. Andrew, I S i s e mployed a s a surveyor in th e Dredging Div i s i o n h e r e o n th e C a nal Z o n e J a n e t, wh o gra duated la s t year, i s in bu siness college in Br o okl y n, N. Y.) f ollowing a secr e tarial c ourse. Earl Palme r of th e cla ss of' 1 9 i s winnin g laur e l s at the lVIass a c hu setts I nstitute o f T ec hn o l o g y Lucille K o p e r s ki, o f la s t cla ss ha s taken lip kin de rg arte n w o rk at th e lVIichig an Sta t e :'\Tonnal C olle g e, in Yp silanti, Mi ch. J oe Udr y '14, i s with th e Chevrolet M o tor Car C ompany in Flint Mi ch. Gift Shady 1 8 i s f ollowing a comme r c ial c o ur s e ina Col orado sc h ool. Kathe rin e Fran c i s Farm e r '12, i s a resident of B oc a s d e l T o ro, R e publi c o f Panama. Robe rt s Carson, 1 8 i s doing e xcellent work at Annapoli s Md. an d h o ld s the rank of mid shipman. i\1anuel Quinte r o 1 9, i s p erus ing law book s at C olumbia Unive r sity, N e w Y ork City with notable s u ccess. J\[ iriam Ste v e n s Baume n, '14, i s residing o n C o lon B e a c h C Z. On e o f th e mOSt inte restin g n e w s it e m s of th e ye ar wa s th e ann o un ce m ent o f D o roth e a \" e s t b e rg' s e ngag e m ent to Mr. Ray m o nd Fitzpatrick. D o r othe a g ra duated with th e cla ss o f 8 Sh e i s to b e an April bride. The frie nd s o f Ethe l Ruth Oti s Page, 7 are w e lc oming h e r ba c k t o th e Z o n e wh e r e s h e i s v i siting f o r a f e w s h o rt m onths The r ecent marriage o f Phylli s Alin e K elly t o i V [ r L ewis \ V orne r wa s o f g e n e ral inte rest t o Z onites an d o th e r s Mr. an d i\1r s \V orne r ar e liv ing in Ancon, C. Z. Ste ph e n s Engl e ke 8 a full -fledge d farm e r i s experie n c ing th e pangs o f h o mesi ckness and will r eturn t o the Z o n e in th e fall. Edward Green '17, an d Charles Davis, 1 8 have deci de d to becom e e n g ineer s and ar e foll o win g that course at Washingto n State C ollege.

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50 T H E ZO" IA:-.I. The friends of Hubert Langlois, '19, will be pleased to kn o w that he is carryin g olr t h e h ig hest marks in his class at ilia :,\Tova, P a. Hubert is studying to become 3n electro-chemist. Branson Stevenson, 'I S. is in Helena. t\I Oflt., working as a pri\'ate secretary to his brother who has western agency for the Cole, Buick, and otha cars. Rensselaer Polytechnic seemed to hav<:: a speci al attraction for thrt:e members of t h e class of I t:!. George Winquist a n d Jac k Wilco x a r e excelli n g th e mselves in a mech anical course a nd Charles Clarity is doi n g spl e n d i d work t h e r e Blossom Com p t o n B o nitez. '14., i s resi d in g in Caye)', Porto R ico. \V i nn ie l\lae Stevenson, 'It:;, was married i n Georgia to C h as

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THE ZONIAN'. 51 UST W I LL A:-.IO TESTAME:-.IT OF T H E CLASS OF '20. \Y e, the Seniors of Balboa H igh School, being of sound minds and of disposing ternperaments, do hereby make, publish, and declar e this, our last will anu testament, revoL;.ing all forIlle r wills, bequests. and devises of nature us made. Flrsl.i n v iew o f t h e fact that the Class of 'I ':J gave u S the right and privilege of t h e desks in rows I and 8 in the hall of our b eloved h ig h school building, and furtherrnorc, that they willed and bequeathed [Q LIS all the dignity, reserVe, and power belonging to a senior c la ss, together with its rare to dis cuss a n d decide questions of importance without the lIslIal quarrels and contention s, we, havin g ourselves of aforesaid gifts and the sam e being i n serviceable condition, do regretfully re linquish tothememher s of the Classof '21 said It:gaci es, trusting t hat will be appreciated, ,S't!CoJtd,-\\'e) the Class of '20, do and bequeath many of our IlUIlH:rous indi vidual virtues to t h e and our less gifted f ellow students. Our est ee med president, j o hn Kull er, l eavl:s his unsullied reputation and pull t o George Capwell, h opi n g that h e won't allow the sam e to deteriora te. Susie : \ lIen, Georgia Ellsworth and H elen loy, havin g united in t h e cause o f peace and quiet. obligingl y bequeath to Florinete .'Ilatter their demureness and general calm, t hereby s howing them selves very \\illing to triple said young lady's scant store of aboveme::ntioned virtues, Albe r t leaves to Gertrude John his everincreasing cyc lopedia of soc iety volubility, with the injunction that s h e incre::ase its prnduction in the coming year. \\,i11is P resscll, in view of the great u rge n cy of the occasion, wills his lovable disposiri on to i\larie Frances T hornton h as willingly condescended to I t'a\'e her excessi\ e to i\\ 'oirdu pois to ;\Iargaret J o hn son. that it \ \ ill be well taken care of, ;\luro Colden leaves his marked to goat gatherin g to l\1 r. B oss, since it was so largel) deveiopt.'d at h is expense. ;\ Iaria Hunsecker, in behalf of the sc hool at larg e leaves her remarkable mus i cal abi lity to Katherine K aye. F owle r Banton inflicts his curiosity upon Theodore Knapp and we, the Seniors, earnestly hope that he'll work it overtime as Fowler has don e Frances \\'estberg leaves her natural capacit), f o r cag ing basket ball s t o A l i ce Orr. Anna Sire surr ende r s h e r striking ly original style;: of locomoti o n to E sthe r Gree n. Ruth \ \'i lson r es ign s h e r qualitr o f F r e n c h ex pressiol) to i\l arion Byrl1 e, confid ent that it will prove ad vantageous. Carla Smith r e linqui s he s her circumspection to Ethe l G etman. i\lartha Zarak, feeling certain that all her digIlity and rest:rve will be appreciated if possessed by Cecilia h e reby enact S aid transition, \\' illiam Christian r esig n s hi!;; ahility in athh:tics to Charles Grobe. Clara \\'ood presents Gertrude van H ardt:veld with h e r tine dramatic talt::llt and s plendi d quality o f voil:e. L y le \\'omac k to L ee Steele's car e, hi s celebrated Upon Charles Seeley doth Harry Grier bestow hi s unlimited o f arguing for u se e peciall)' in the classroom. .'Ilabe l I. ee, from the depth of hcr benevolent nature rdinquis h es h e r great abhorrence:: o f notoriety to j \ largaret H alligan. \\'arren Jordan flllJy intended to leavt: hi s ego ism to some junior but, upon investigation, has dt'cided that tht:re is no need for it. : \lways ready to give h elp wht.'re it is needt:d, Jane Calvit grants h e r and a thleti c tendency to Duncan. David Ne"ille endows Edward Brad" with his famous golden smi l e Pinall y, Rohert G etman dedicates the:: t:nviable;: task of wriring the Class \\'ill of next year to the unfortunate paragon of this J uni o r class, I i\ \\'HEREOF, I na \'e hereunto st:t hand and St'al this eighth of june, :\nno D ornini ninc:tC:C:11 hundrc:d and twellry. S!G:-;ED SE.\LED: H obc:rt Getman, b\' the said Class of ':w, as and for its lasr will and ment, in the presence of us, \'{hot at irs request, in its presen ce. and in the pre e n ce ot each other, hereunto subscribed o u r names as attt:sting witllesses to said i nstrument. [THEIR -CL.\" OF '20

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52 THE ZONIAN. o Nolurl .-1. '20. During a brawl in a C h icago r esort an I rish man g o t p o k ed in th e eye with a sti ck, and h e immediately started proceedings again s t th e offe n der. "Come now, sa i d the magistrate, ;oY ou don't really believe h e meant to put your eye ou t ? "No, I don't, sa id the C elt, "but I do b elieve h e tried to put it farther in." "\Yell Si, What you gOllna call yo ur cow? "\\'ell, J calc'late to call h e r '. -\m erica' "Better not, Si; s h e'd be apt to go dry." Wh o discovered Ameri ca?" "Ohio," r e pli ed the littl e girl. "No, C o lumbu s discove r e d Am erica "Yes'm. Co lumbu s was his first nam e," Wh ere do you lik e to s kate be s t, W illie?" HNear the danger s ign." I go to H eaven," s aid a worna n to h e r hu s band ''I'm going to as k S h a k espeare if h e wrote those plays." "Suppose h e isn't t h e re," her hu sband repli ed. "Then you ask him. F,rs/ worke r "Did you si ng at tht: prison to-day?" Stcond worke r Yes, but I wasn't appreciated, for some reason." Fir s l worker-What did you sing?" Second worker-"H ow Can I L eave Thee." i\l a r y had a Ii ttle lamb Likewise a l o b ste r stew, :\nd ere the s unlit m o rning dawned S h e had the nightmare, t oo. "Yo u r pic tur e i s n 't comp l e te, o l d man. Y ou've got the h orse in, but yo u ha ven't d r awn the ca rt. "Oh, I m going to l e t t h e h orse draw th e cart. T wo s mall b oys we r e d i sc us s ing the merits of their r es p ective pare nt s. The conve rsati o n had r eac h ed a highl y c riti ca l and persollal stage. W e ll, r em ark ed o n e, Y o u ca n say w hat yo u please, but I reckon ) our father's about the m ea n est man that eve r liv ed Fancy his letting you walk around in t h em o ld s h oes and him a s h oemak er." Huh !" r ema rk ed th e othe r My fat h e r ain' t half so m ea n as yo ur s. Wh y, fan cy him be in g a dentist a n d yo ur bab y on ly got o n e tooth !" S;'e H ow did you get in s ky?" H e "vVith a latchk y " What i s it that k ee ps the m oon in plac e and prevent s it from fallin g?" asked Jim. I suppose it's t h e beams," return ed his brot h er. H e r e, wait er! Thi s s t ea k i s positive l y burn ed bla c k." Yes, s ir. of resp e ct, s ir. Ou r h ead coo k died yesterday." Speaki n g of bathing in famous s prin gs," sa id the tramp t o' th e tourist, I bathed in the sp ring of '86

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THE ZONI AN 53 Lad)" (sh op ping ) : How muc h are the se chic k -ens, please ?" S t o r ekeepe r: A dollar and a half." "And did )'ou r a i se th e m yourselP" Yes, mam. Yesterday w e r e a dolla r an d it q uart er." '" fear t ha t th e yo un g man to whom I gave a job in t h e s h o p l a s t wee k i s d i s h o nest." Y o u s h o uld n o t judge b y appearan ces." I m judging b y dis appearance s in thi s c a se. Employe r: Y o u l oo k r o bu st. Ar e you e qual to the tas k o f s awing wood?" Bol.rllt!vik: "Equal i s n't th e wo r d. I'm s up er i o r t o it. Go od-by." J Jislress C oo k the d inn erol1 the patent petrol stove to-day, i\f aria." l\laria "\\'ell, I b e gan to, mum, but t h e stove w ent Ollt. i1liJlrl'ss l.i g ht it aga in th en." j \Ja ria -"YeS,lllllll1 but it's n o t com e bac k yet; it we n t Ollt t hr o ugh the roof." ;\11 aviator tells this true o f his training in a southern camp during th e war H e ant.! a comrade were sent o n a rathe r l o n g trip in a dirigibl e a s a part o f th eir training, and whil e they w e r e in th e air t hey becam e confused and lost th eir way. A.ccord ingly they descen ded until they could see a l abore r at work jus t b e low them. Shutting off th e e ngine, they waited until t her wer e in hailin g distance and called out, '" say, wh e r e are w e? " Y o u ca n 't fool m e. Y ou're up in t h at t h ere balloon wa s t h e unexp ec t ed rep l y. "\\' ha t tim e i s it? I 'm invited to a a n d m y wa tc h ain' t g o ing." "\\'hat' s th e matter? :\in't your watch invited?" \Yhat do you think of th e tw o c andid a tes?" "\\'ell, th e m o r e I think o f th e m t h e m o r e p l e a sed am that o n e o f t h e m c an b e e lect ed. "1\l y uncl e ha s be e n e lect ed mayor. H ones tly 1" "O h that don 't matte r." Fntn l Ef/ect. Yesterday afte rn oo n h e r ead his co p y o f Th e Eagle. Three h o urs later h e d i ed." F rom an obituary in th e Brooklyn Eagle : \ p oo r man ha d hard l y b ee n able to suppl y his wif e and fami l y with th e n ecessaries o f lif e until one day h e s tru c k it rich. A t la s t m y d e ar," h e s ai d to h i s wife, "you will b e able to buy you r se lf sOllle decent cloth es 'I'll do n o thing o f th e kind," s h e s aid, 'I'll get t h e sa m e kind th e oth e r w o m en wea r." Bri ggs "Did yo u kn ow ha d an artisti c tale n t?" Brown :'\ T O!" Briggs "\rhy yes t erday h e drew a picture of a rabbit o n his fath er's ba l d h e a d a n d everyo n e th ought i t wa s a hair. S unda y School lcacher JohnI1Y, ca n you tell m e wh o built t h e ark?" 70hnny "Naw." Sunda), Sch ool I cacher "Correc t ." A you n g sol dier lay wounded in a h os pita l in France. :\ nurse sa id: "i\ 1 1 r l ad g ive me your name so I c an t ell your moth e r." } Olillg soldic r "i\ T y moth e r kn o w s my name. FirJIII'ailer wis h I wa s a we ighing ma c hin e. Secol/ d Irniter "\\'hv 1" F irstIVniter -"Everybodr tip s th e sca les." T encher I '1ll good l oo king." What t e n se is that 1" S tudCllt "Past. " I do n't f ee l well thi s m o rning." Wh ere do v o u f ee l th e wor s t 1" ., I n sc h ool." Sergeml/ "\\' h at's the matter with you guys? K eep ),our eyes off t h e ground. D on't watch yo u r feet. They' r e b i g e n o ugh to tak e ca r e of t h e m s el ves." P riVflle-" l'm gonna brain that guy wh e n drill's over." Second Privale-"Huh you'r e g o nnaget in lin e a n wait f o r your turn!

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54 T H E ZO:,\ IA:\, GrzggJ"\\'hen 1 don't catc h the nam e of a person 1'''e been introduced to, 1 ask if its s p e lled with an 'e' or an 'j', It gene rally works, too." 8/'iggJ "1 used to try that dodge myself until I was introduced to a young lady at a parry. \Yhen 1 put th e question about the 'e' or i s h e flushed angril,' and wouldn't spea k the wh o l e eTening. "\\'hat was her name?" 1 found o u t later it was H ill." A, lady kn itted a pair of soc k s and sen t her add res s with the soc k s to Fran ce, The soldier who received the sock s wrote to the lad y as follow s : The socks recei, o ed, they almost fit. I wear o n e f o r a helmet and one for a mit I hope to meet when I've done my bit. But where in -d i d y o u l earn to knit: Finl PlIpil" l f it's h eads, we go to b ed I f it's tails, we stay up Second Pupil Y eh, and if it stands on ed g e 'Ve Little \\'illie, who had just be e n to see a football gam e s h ocked his mot h er by praying as follows; "God bless mot h er, God hless fat h e r, God sister, R a h Rah-R a h'" Pupil-" D oes "post mortem" m ean examinatio n after death I" Teacher-" Y es ," PlIpil \ Y ell, if you don't mind, ] '11 take the rest of min e lik e that, think I'm quite a musician." Y es, you ought t o be with 'ag ner "Why, h e's dead " I know it," : \11 those who think our J okes are p oo r ,," a u l d c ha n ge their views Cou l d t hey compa r e t h e o ne s w e p r int \\'ith tho se that we r efuse.

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THE ZO:,\ IA:,\ 55 = "We Specialize in ['den's Clothes = READY MADE -:-SEMI-READY -:-MADE TO ORDER All Kinds (If Haberdas hery PA LA IS lxOY AL J. S. Pereira, Prop. Corner Central Avenue and Ninth Street, Panama m The Panama COl'a-Cola Bottling Co., Inc. ; Importers, J olJ/lerS, l VIJo JesaJ e Comm;s .... i orJ JferclJ:lnts = Ginger ................................... Mineral = A :'to' V UOTTJ.F;IlS O F Ale Water m Soda Coca-Cola Hires Root i W t B 'l@;!
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56 THE ZONJAN. * 1Vilen YOll 1Vant m A TR ACK SHIRT. A PAIR OF RUNNING PANTS A BATHI N G SUIT or i n f 3C t anythi n g i n KNIT ATHLETIC WEAR, a s k your dea:er f o r THE HYGIENIC GOODS Made by Tlle Hygiene Fleeced Undenvear Co. PHILADELPHIA, PA m SPEAK/.VGOF Wllen in Panama Photographs! 00 NOT FAIL TO CALL AT waTH tha t i s Artistic. I The French Bazaar I : ::it. and Best Qualit y m ENDARA L a rge D epartment Store The High School Seniors r ecommend D Headquarte r s f o r P a ri s i a n N o velties = m LOC ATION Convenient A c cess i ble PANAMA C OLO P ARIS. NmCab:.Offl.eon Central Avenue Phone 386 .

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T H E ZONIAN. 57

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58 T H E ZO:\I.'\:\. m m Bastiall B r o t ller s CO. MANUFAC TURE R S O F Class Rings Class Pins Athletic Medals m Comme n ce m ent Announce m ents m a nd Inyitations Ca lling Cards . 356 BASTIAN BUILDING ROCHESTER. N Y * m COOLIN G HorIiGk's malted milk DELICIOUS m ." .. "" ..... "" .. "".".""." .. "" .. " ......... "...... .. ..... .. .......................... "."."" .. "" ..... Very nutritious and Drink i t ice cold when whol esome sati s fies tha t everhot,tire d,orthirs t y. b etween m e a l hun"e r b ..... .................. ....................... ........... ".. .. ............................... "." ....... ... "."." .... CELEBRA T E D f o r its Q UALITY and FLAVOR the WORLD OVE R * m A GOOD NIGHT DRINK =

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THE ZO:,\ I AK 59 I m THE UNI'VERSAL CAR A Car that a Lady can drive m THE NEW ELECTRIC STARTER Ford TourillgCar = PRICE $735 plus frei&ht to CANAL. ARMY. NAVY MEN. = Smallwood Brothers COLON DEALERS PANAMA .... ,., .. ,.'., .. ......... .... ................ .. ,....... .......................................................... The Famolls T h e = Royal 20,000 i = Cord Mile Tire = ......................................................... .. ......................................................... Smallwood Brothers COLON AGENTS UNITED STATES RUBBER CO. PANAMA

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60 T H E ZON IA:\. P R ONE 784 m Dr. Vernon Crosbie = Surgeon-Dentist 125 CENTRAL A V ENUE PANAMA Use d by U n c l e S ;1111'S Expert Riflemen = HOP P E S \Nitro pO"vvder\ = Solvent No. 9 (Trade Mark Re gistered) For c1eullillg high power (.springfield) Rifles. Ret 'o/vers, .l/achille CUllS, and Firearms of all kinds. A compound that will remove the residue of any high power powder, in-black powder. It will eliminate rusting and pitting in any loosen metal fouling and !! No.9 is the only rille cleaning solvent that will remove rust, metal m (ouling, and leading. m No riflemen or quartermaster's department should b e without it. S old by Budwue and Spo
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1 H E 20"IA". 6 1 PHONE 1031 PANAMA P O. BOX 55, ANCON, C Z = r .. .. .. .. .... .. i BOWDRY m ':'.'.' DESIGNERS m :,1: "The Busiest Store on the I sthmus" 1 .ltERtCd,\' IIILLI V E R I "nd D RESS P .1RIOR S jIMPORTERS' r ll! I III R ) :.:] B U ILDERS i L .......... ................... ...i ISADORA BOWDRY Proprietor Opposite Ancon Post Office No. 1 3 Calle 4 de Julio Panama STATIONERY = i mOHRN p, FOHD I ENORMOUS STOCK, LOWEST PRICES, (l PROMPT DELIVERIES * = Ollr POPIlIe" t rade mark specia ll ies: I QUA LIT Y I "Textlne" i "Melba" T 1 "Shamrock" "Hudson" J e lve ers "Paragon" "Amneco" "NIle" "Monarch" Dexter W ; "Ever Ready" "A. N C, m; '. I Co rres p o n de n ce 'u.'ith .\I e r c h o n ts. l mporIus, a u d l arge co n su m ers i11'l.lileti. Centrnl Ave. and I Opposite TIIJ-c .\;\IEHIl'AXXE,n; SthSrreet C ommissar y CO;\LPAXY, IXC, !., PA NAMA COLON !.', Nos 9 -11 13-1 5 Park Pi ace New York City

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62 THE ZO)lIAN. m CABARET "CIRO" = = PANAMA'S FINEST CABARET = = An attracti ve, up-to-da t e Cabaret where = clean p eople can e njoy clean entertain-m ent furnis h e d by a group of the mos t tal ente d entertainers eyer heard on the I sthmus. Hig h Class Artists and I = :.!:. prompt sen ice. = PICTURES taken or anything at a n y and any'-Vhere = We Specialize in Quality Portraits = = THE MARINE STUDIO = 109 CENTRAL AVENUE PANAMA CITY

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THE ZON IAN. 63 = DUQUE COMPANY INC. = II HARDW ARE LUMBER ARMS II -=-AMMUNITION FISHING TACKLE SOLE AGENTS FOR DEVOE & REYNOLDS Co., Inc. P A INTS AND BR US HES = r .. .. .... .... .. .. .. .. .... .... .. .. .. .. ...... .. .. ...... .. .. .... .. .. .......... 1 .1.. I I :: at moderate prices. : i i THE students of the high sc hool wish to express their gratitude and appreciation to Mr. J C Searcy and the Universal Film Ex-change for the two films that they donated to aid the vaudeville performances which were given by the students for the purpose of raisins money for this paper.

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6 4 THE ZO:\IA:\. We appreciate to the fullest extent the help given by States' and local advertisers in ing this issue of "The Zonian" a financial suc-cess and for them the patronage of our many friends. BUSINESS MANAGER. __________________ __________________ __