Front Cover
 The Head or the Heart
 Annie at the Cottage
 Title Page
 Back Cover

Title: The head or the heart, or, Knowledge puffeth up, charity edifieth
Full Citation
Permanent Link: http://ufdc.ufl.edu/UF00026050/00001
 Material Information
Title: The head or the heart, or, Knowledge puffeth up, charity edifieth
Alternate Title: Knowledge puffeth up, charity edifieth
Physical Description: 62, 2 p., 1 leaf of plates : ill. (some col.) ; 16 cm.
Language: English
Creator: Bell, Catherine D ( Catherine Douglas ), d. 1861
Thomas Nelson & Sons ( Publisher )
Publisher: T. Nelson and Sons
Place of Publication: London ;
Edinburgh ;
New York
Publication Date: 1871
Subject: Christian life -- Juvenile fiction   ( lcsh )
Charity -- Juvenile fiction   ( lcsh )
Pride and vanity -- Juvenile fiction   ( lcsh )
Students -- Juvenile fiction   ( lcsh )
Thought and thinking -- Juvenile fiction   ( lcsh )
Friendship -- Juvenile fiction   ( lcsh )
Publishers' advertisements -- 1871   ( rbgenr )
Prize books (Provenance) -- 1871   ( rbprov )
Bldn -- 1871
Genre: Publishers' advertisements   ( rbgenr )
Prize books (Provenance)   ( rbprov )
non-fiction   ( marcgt )
Spatial Coverage: England -- London
Scotland -- Edinburgh
United States -- New York -- New York
Statement of Responsibility: by Cousin Kate.
General Note: Publisher's advertisements follow text.
Funding: Preservation and Access for American and British Children's Literature, 1870-1889 (NEH PA-50860-00).
 Record Information
Bibliographic ID: UF00026050
Volume ID: VID00001
Source Institution: University of Florida
Holding Location: Baldwin Library of Historical Children's Literature in the Department of Special Collections and Area Studies, George A. Smathers Libraries, University of Florida
Rights Management: All rights reserved, Board of Trustees of the University of Florida.
Resource Identifier: aleph - 002222068
notis - ALG2302
oclc - 57694621

Table of Contents
    Front Cover
        Page 1
        Page 2
    The Head or the Heart
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        Page 5
    Annie at the Cottage
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    Title Page
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    Back Cover
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THE HEAD OR THE HEART.HE little parish school ofHeywood was in great ex-citement. The clergyman,Mr. Adams, had announcedhis intention of examining the scholarsin the Bible and Catechism; and thechildren of the bookseller, Mr. Blake,had great news to tell of the dozenor more of handsome Bibles andTestaments which their father hadgot from London for Mr. Adams,and which were to be all given awayin prizes to the best scholars."The Bible that is for the highest

6 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.prize," Nelly Blake cried, "is the veryhandsomest father ever had in hisshop. You never saw such a beauty.""I wonder who will get it!" criedseveral voices."Oh, Annie Scott, of course!" Nellysaid. And "Annie Scott, of course,"sounded from every side. "No onehas a chance against Annie Scott."Annie Scott, a girl between thirteenand fourteen, sitting at the head ofthe highest class, tried to look as ifshe did not hear; but she could nothelp drawing up her head, could notkeep her eyes from dancing, her lipsfrom smiling, as she felt the assurancethat they were right, and that shewas indeed pretty sure of the highestprize. She was perhaps the youngestgirl in her class, and yet she kept herplace at the head with perfect easeand great regularity. If she lost itfor a day, or even half a day, it was

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 7counted quite an extraordinary eventin the school, and talked about forperhaps a day or two afterwards. Shewas well accustomed to being lookedup to, to hearing the other scholarssay that she was sure to do best. Inthe half-yearly examinations, or inchance visits of strangers to the school,she was quite accustomed to have allthe difficult questions brought back toher. She knew and understood per-fectly the look of relief which cameover the master's face, when he turnedto her after having been fretted andworried by the stupidity of the others,and was well accustomed to hear himsay, "Come, Annie, you can answerthat, I know, if no one else can."There were many reasons for thisher superiority to the others. Shewas a very clever child, with an ex-cellent memory. She learned quickly,and remembered easily, and she had

8 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.besides more time to give to herlessons than any other girl in theschool. Mrs. Scott had only twolittle boys besides Annie; and anorphan niece of her husband's, a clever,active girl of eighteen, who lived withthem, gave her so much help in herhousehold work, that Annie was calledupon to do very little. Annie wasvery fond of praise, and so eager tobe first in everything, that she madegood use of the leisure thus given her,and spared no pains to learn herlessons perfectly, grudged no trouble,so that she could be sure of surpassingher companions, and keeping herplace of dux.As regarded Bible knowledge inparticular, she had a great advantageover all the others. Her father andmother were uncommonly piouspeople, and took more pains in teach-ing their children than perhaps any

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 9parent in the place. Thus it was less'Annie's merit than her happiness thatshe was so far before her companions,although she herself did not think so.She prided herself greatly upon hersuperiority, and was apt to look withgreat contempt upon everyone whowas inferior to her," There is big Jane coming," saidone of the girls, looking out of thewindow, "I wonder how she willget on.""Get on indeed !" cried Annie,with a toss of her head. " Why, shewill never get on at all. Therenever was such a fool. She knowsnothing. She is a perfect disgraceto the school. I wonder Mr, Jonesdid not tell her to stay away to-day."The disgrace to the school came inas Annie spoke. She was a tall,awkward-looking girl, about fifteen,who came in with a shy, frightened

10 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.air, and sat down in the lowest class,among little ones of five or six yearsold. No one knew much about JaneThorn-big Jane, as the school-girlscalled her. She had come to theschool about three weeks before this,had paid for a month's schooling, andasked timidly to be admitted into theclass where the A B C was taught.Before this no one had ever seen herabout the village. For these threeweeks she had attended school regu-larly, was very diligent and attentive,and had made very rapid progress inlearning to read; but she had madeno friends, no acquaintance among thegirls. She always came in time for themaster, but only in time; not half anhour before, as most of them did, toenjoy a gossip in the school-room, ora game in the yard. And the momentschool was over, she hastened away tothe poor little cottage in the outskirts

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 11of the village, where she lived withan old woman whom she calledmother. The cottage stood by itselfin a lane that was little used, so thatthere was no one to watch thestrangers, to find out what they did,or how they lived; and indeed theyhad been there some little time beforeany one, except the master of theshbp where they bought their pro-visions, knew of their existence.In the ordinary arrangements ofthe school, the oldest and youngestclasses were far apart; but on thisday, when the whole school wasformed into one circle, they werebrought together. Only a fewscholars separated Annie Scott fromJane; agd Annie, casting scornfulglances at the tall, awkward girl,drew up her head higher than ever,and smiled to herself in great con-tentment, as she thought of the con-

12 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.trast that there would be betweenthem when they came to answerquestions. In her exaltation shemight have expressed her feelings tooplainly, and made remarks whichmight have reached the other's ears,and vexed her a good deal; but asusual Jane had not come at all toosoon, and was closely followed byMr. Adams and Mr. Jones.The examination by Mr. Adamswas the sole business of the day, andhe began immediately after openingthe school by prayer. At first heexamined only upon very well knownparts of Scripture history and bio-graphy, and his questions were soeasy, that even the little ones couldanswer them. without hesitation.Only poor big Jane was at fault.Each time the question came roundto her, she was obliged to let it passunanswered, although, after her first

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 13failure, Mr. Adams chose subjectsupon which he supposed it impossibleshe could be ignorant. He evidentlydid not know what to make of her.Seeing her among the little ones, hemight have supposed that she waswanting in intellect, utterly stupid,or obstinately sullen, had it not beenfor the eager interest with which shelistened to the different questions and"answers as they passed round theschool, and her gentle, respectfulmanner of uttering her one sadanswer, "Please, sir, I don't know."At the second or third time of herfailing, as Mr. Jones saw the clergy-man pause, .and look keenly at thepoor girl, he stepped forward to makeexcuses for her."She is a good and very diligentgirl," he said kindly; "but she isonly beginning to learn. You said,Jane, that you had never been able

14 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.to go to school before, did notyou ?""No, sir; I never was in the waybefore," she said, in a low, timid voice,and giving Mr. Jones a glance ofearnest gratitude for his kind con-sideration of her feelings.Mr. Adams caught the look, andwas struck by it-it was so full offeeling. He felt a strong interest inthe girl, and was very sorry for her,thus forced to expose her ignorancebefore children so much younger, andyet so much better informed thanherself."If you don't know anythingabout these subjects upon which Ihave questioned you, my dear child,"he said gently, "can you tell meanything you do know about, and Ishall examine you upon it."She looked quickly up at him withher serious eyes, so full of meaning,

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 15hesitated a moment, then gatheringcourage from his kind looks, sheanswered in a low voice, and castingher eyes again to the ground,--" I know that I am a sinner, andthat Christ died for sinners."The answer was so unexpected, andgiven with so much feeling, that everyone was struck by it. Mr. Adamswas greatly touched."God be thanked, my child," hesaid solemnly, laying his hand uponher head, " that he has taught you toknow so much." He said no morethen; but when he came back to her,after going again round the school,leaving the Old Testament historywith which he had been engaged, heasked her in those same kind, en-couraging tones,-" And can you tell me, my child,who the Lord Jesus Christ is ?""He is God, sir," she answered

16 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.reverently. "One with God-equalto God.""And how, or why did he die forsinners?"She again raised her eyes to his,and with an earnestness of feelingwhich made her voice low and tremu-lous, she replied,-"He died for us because we hadby our great sinfulness deserved todie, and God was angry with us forour sins. Christ became a man likeus, that he might bear the punish-ment which we had deserved-and itwas all poured out upon him, so thatthere might be nothing left to us."" "And God forgives us for Christ's'sake ?" he asked." He more than forgives us," she* 'cried in her great eagerness, forgettingthat there were so many to hear her;"He counts our sins to Christ, andChrist's holiness to us, and loves ust'

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 17as he loves Christ." The last wordswere spoken with a burst of tears.Her heart overflowed as she thoughtand spoke of the glorious truth. Shecovered her face with her hands, andtried to hide how much she felt.Both Mr. Adams and Mr. Jonesfelt tears rise to their own eyes. Thechild's complete ignorance on everyother point seemed to render moretouching her full understanding ofthese. They felt half inclined to envyher the depth, the freshness of feelingwhich she enjoyed; and both rejoicedgreatly in this manifest token of God'shaving himself taught her-himselfdealt with her soul. After a moment'spause Mr. Adams left her, and wenton again with the regular examina-tion. After a few more questions onBible history, he took the Catechismand examined the children in it. Theelder class answered, upon the whole,2

18 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.very well; Annie Scott perfectly,without a single mistake. Some ofthe younger scholars failed in the exactwords, but the greater part showedsuch a knowledge of the meaning ofthe answers to all the questions, aswas very delightful to Mr. Adams,and greatly to the credit of theirparents and teacher. To Jane theCatechism was still more an unknownbook than the Bible. But now thathe knew how matters were with her,he was tenderly careful not to exposeher ignorance. When he did ask hera question, it was more with the man-ner of a friend anxious to know whathe could teach her than of a mastertrying to find out whether or not shehad learned her lesson properly. Allthe children were conscious that hespoke to Jane more tenderly than tothem, and even, as it seemed, with akind of respect. But Annie Scott

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 19was the only one who was offended bythis. She felt as if Jane were de-priving her of what was her own right-as if the interest which Jane hadawakened both in Mr. Adams andMr. Jones ought rather to have beenexcited by her own perfect ready an-swering of every question. And evenat the moment when the beautifulBible for the best scholar was putinto her hands, half its charm wastaken away as she heard Mr. Adamssay to Jane,-" These prizes must all be given tothose who have showed most know-ledge of the Bible and Catechism,because for such they were got; butso soon as you can read, come tome, and I promise you that you shallnot be left a single day without thebook you can so well prize, so welluse."" Indeed, I think it is very ridicu-

20 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.lous, and quite unfair of Mr. Adamsto make such a work with her," Anniecried, as she and her young com-panions discussed the matter on theirway home. " She does not know asmuch as the youngest child in theschool." %" I should think she does not in-deed," said one: " She did not evenknow the name of Adam's wife.""Nor Jacob's father," cried a third;and they laughed together over therecollection of poor Jane's failures."And then to see Mr. Jones andMr. Adams make so much of her,"pursued Annie; "I declare it wastoo bad. Much encouragement thereis to us to take pains to learn, and allthat, if she is to get as much praiseas we do."A hand laid upon her shoulderchecked her indignant words; sheturned round and saw Mr.- Adams

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 21behind her. It was evident from hisgrave looks that he had overheardwhat she had said." My dear child," he said seriously,"do you mean to say that you readyour Bible, and take pains to learnits history and doctrines, only for thesake of being praised, or made a workwith, as you call it'?""No, sir, no," she answered, muchvexed and confused." Or do you mean to say," he pur-sued, " that when God, in his greatgoodness, has placed you where youare carefully taught to know his pre-cious truths, the blessing is greaterin your eyes because you know of onewho does not share it with you ? Doyou rejoice more in your own know-ledge of the Scripture because Janeis ignorant ?"" No, sir; I did not mean that," shesaid.

22 THE HEAD OR THE HEART."What, then, did you mean?" heasked again. *Annie looked at her companions,as if to seek help in answering fromthem; but they, awed by the gravityof Mr. Adams' manner, were glad todraw back, and to leave her to makethe best of it. Mr. Adams stood still,evidently determined to have an an-swer. Annie coloured, stammered,hesitated, and at last came out verybluntly with the truth,-"It was only that I that wethought it was not fair to make somuch of her who knew nothing, asof-of-'" Of you who know so much," heconcluded gravely." Of any of us, sir," she said moreboldly. "We all knew much morethan she did. We all answered muchbetter."" Whose knowledge was of the

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 23most value, do you think?" heasked.She did not answer; she did notunderstand him. Jane, she thought,had no knowledge worth speakingabout. He continued very earnestly,and with a grave kindness,-" You can easily tell me the nameof Adam's wife, of Jacob's father, anda great many more facts of the samekind; 'but could you say, not with thelips or from the mind merely, butfrom the heart, 'I know that I am asinner,' as Jane did ? No doubt youknow much more of Scripture historythan she does; but do you know aswell as Jane does what the holy Godthinks of sin; what a grievous andhateful thing it is in his sight ?"Annie tried to assert boldly thatshe did; but there was something inMr. Adams' look, in the solemnity ofhis manner, that checked her, she knew

24 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.not why. She could neither meetnor avoid his searching gaze. Shefelt uncomfortable, and wished thathe would pass on, and leave her alone.After a minute's pause, to see if shemeant to answer, he went on,-"I am much interested in Jane,because I think that in her I can seevery strong proofs that she is a child ofmy Father in heaven. But, my dearchild, my dear children, believe me, mywhole heart is also interested in you, ofwhom I have as yet no reason to knowwhether you are God's children ornot. It would have made me and.Mr. Jones more happy than you canimagine, could we have believed thatevery one of you possessed that preciousknowledge which God has given toJane-even the knowledge that sheis a lost sinner in God's sight, andthat Christ has died to save her."There were again a few moments of

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 25silence. The children did not knowwhat to say, and Mr. Adams wasunwilling to say too much at thattime. He walked on a few steps withthem, and asked after the sick fatherof one of the girls, the baby brotherof another, and, finally, whether anyof them could tell him where Janelived." In Deep Lane," said two or threevoices. He considered for a moment,and looked at his watch." I have not time to go so far," hesaid; "I have an appointment. Doany of you pass near her house.?""I do," said Annie Scott, veryglad to be able to speak freely again." I pass the end of the lane, and cantake a message if you like, sir."He thanked her with all the plea-sant courtesy of manner natural tohim, and asked her to tell Jane thathe should like to see her at his house

26 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.that evening at six o'clock. Anniepromised to deliver the message, andwent up Deep Lane to do so beforegoing home.The cottage looked very miserable.Annie glanced at the broken window,torn thatch, stained walls, and roundthe wild, rough garden, and contrastedthem with her father's tidy, comfort-able house and her mother's beautiful,flourishing flowers and vegetables." Poor Jane, this must be a drearyplace to live in," she thought, as sheknocked at the door. Jane opened it,and smiled very pleasantly when shesaw who had knocked. She askedAnnie to come into the kitchen. Itwas a very poor-looking place. Theplaster was broken, and either hungin patches away from the walls, orhad fallen down altogether, and leftthe lath bare and miserable-looking.There was very little furniture in the

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 27room-a small bed, a table, a stool,an arm-chair on one side of the fire-place, and in it sat an old woman,cowering over the small fire. Shelooked sharply round when Anniecame in, and showed a withered, verycross, disagreeable countenance."Who is that ? and what does shewant ?" she asked, frowning at Annie." It is Annie Scott, mother," saidJane. " I told you about Annie, andabout the beautiful Bible she got.You have got it with you," she added,looking at it admiringly, but withoutthe least envy. Annie held it out toher. Jane took it and showed it tothe old woman."Look what a beauty, mother!And it is the Bible too; God's Word."" I don't care what it is. I don'twant to see it," cried the old womanangrily. " If it were yours, and wecould self it to buy meat and drink,

28 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.it would be something worth talkingabout; but I don't care for it sincewe can't sell it."Jane's face had been very brightand pleasant all this time, but now acloud passed over it, and with a deepsigh she gave Annie back her Bible.Annie saw the change of expressionand heard the sigh. She fancied thatJane was sorry she could not sell thepretty Bible to get money for food,and being really a kind-hearted girl,she felt great pity for both motherand daughter. "They must," shethought, " be very poor to go on liv-ing in such a miserable house, and tostand in such great need of money asto wish to have my Bible only for thepurpose of selling it." Annie was notmuch accustomed to see very poorpeople. No one in Heywood wasvery rich, but neither was any one inabsolute want. And perhaps she felt

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 29all the more sorry for Jane and hermother, because she had hardly everbefore known any one who seemed insuch distress for want of money. Theold woman asking again very angrilywhat she wanted, Annie gave her mes-sage hurriedly. Jane looked greatlypleased." Thank you for coming to tell me,"she said heartily. " I shall be so gladto go; I wished much to speak to him,but did not like to go without beingtold."" Do you know where Mr. Adams'house is ?" asked Annie.Jane did not, but said she could findit out. Annie offered to come andtake her to it." Oh, thank you very much,"said Jane again very gratefully."It is very kind of you; youwere very good to cdme to tellme before you had even taken

30 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.home your Bible to show it to themall."Jane's gratitude was pleasant toAnnie, who liked to grant favours.She was beginning, to like Jane, andto forget all about the jealousy shehad felt for her. The two girls wentout together. Annie lingered aftersaying Good-bye, hesitated, and at lastsaid, shyly-"Your mother seems to think thatyou have not enough to-that youwant money. I have eighteenpenceof my own-"" Oh, thank you very, very much,"Jane interrupted eagerly; "but, in-deed, we have quite enough. Wewant for nothing. Only I am all thesame obliged to you."" But your mother seemed to thinkyou had not enough.""She might think it. She doesthink it. But she does not know.

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 31She only fancies things. She doesnot know anything rightly now. Hermind is quite away. She is veryold.""But you sighed too, and lookedsorrowful," Annie persisted, her com-passion and generosity increasing, themore unwilling Jane seemed to be toprofit by them."Did I ? If I did," she answered,looking sorrowful again, " I suppose itwas because poor mother did not carefor God's Word, and only thought ofselling it."" But how do you live ? What doyou live upon ?" Annie asked, with aglance of pity at the miserable house." I can sew very quickly, and theshop-people say very well. Mr. Green,of the big shop up there, gives me asmany shirts to make, and as muchtrimming to embroider, as I can wellmanage to get done."

82 THE HEAD OR THE HEART."That is it! How do you manageto get any work done and you at schoolall day ?"" Oh," Jane answered cheerfully,"there are the mornings, and ever somany hours at night; I get on fam-ously. To be sure, when this monthis done, I have no money ready foranother at school just yet. But I cankeep on learning by myself for a littlenow I know the way; and when Isew all day long, I'll soon get enoughfor another month."Annie still lingered, and seemed tohave more to say. Jane stood at thedoor waiting till she should say it.In the end it came out very bluntly,-" Is that old woman your mother,Jane ? she looks so old.""No; my father and mother diedof fever in the same day, when Iwas only a week or two old, I be-lieve."

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 83"'our grandmother, then ?" Annieasked again."No; I don't fancy she is anythingto me. I don't rightly know how itwas. I think father and mother diedin her house, and she took care of mebecause there was no one else to doit. Any way, I have lived with herever since I can recollect."" She-seems awfully cross and dis-agreeable," said Annie. "I wonderhow you can live with her !"" She took care of me when I couldnot take care of myself, and fed andclothed me many a year. To be sureI must take care of her now. I couldnot do anything else,"Jane said simply." But is not she awfully cross ?"Annie persisted." I don't mind that much. Oh !"she cried, with a sudden burst of tears,"if she would only love God, she-might be a hundred times crosser, I8

84 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.should not care !" and she turned has-tily into the house, unable to say more.Annie went home eager to show herBible, but, perhaps, still more eagerto tell her mother all about Jane.Mrs. Scott was a very kind, motherlywoman. She was much interested inall Annie had to tell, and advised herto make a friend of Jane, and try tohelp her as much as she could." I could help her about her learn-ing to read," said Annie. " I meanto offer to go every afternoon, andgive her a lesson, if she likes."The offer was made that evening;Jane was very grateful, and acceptedit eagerly. The two girls had apleasant walk to Mr. Adams' house.Annie was greatly amused by Jane'stotal ignorance of all country matters,and by the strange questions she askedabout everything they saw." I never lived in the country be-

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 85fore" Jane explained. "I have al-ways lived in London."" In London!" Annie cried, withsudden respect for her new friend." Oh, how I should like to see Lon-don There are such beautiful thingsthere, are there not ? ""I don't know. I suppose so,"Jane answered indifferently. "ButI saw little of them. -I saw little ofanything but wickedness and sorrow.Oh, such wickedness !"" What kind of wickedness ?" Annieasked curiously."All kinds. Lying, cheating, steal-ing-everything. But it is bad enoughto know about it. I don't want tothink-I don't want to speak of it.""And in what kind of a place didyou live ?"" In many, many places," she an-swered in a hurried way, as if shewished to forget all about it. "NeverS

36 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.long in one place, but always in suchdark, miserable holes. In lanes, or inlittle courts, where the houses wereever so high, and so close togetherthat the sun never got into us, andwe could hardly see even a morsel ofthe sky. And heaps upon heaps ofpeople-bad, cruel, angry people-lived all together, and there neverwas quiet, or peace, or anything good."She spoke with so much agitationthat Annie's interest was strongly ex-cited. She was sorry to see hownearly they had reached Mr. Adams'gate." If you like, Jane," she said, " Ican wait hereabouts for you till youcome out; and if you are not long,we shall have time to go to that placein the wood where I told you therewere ever so many birds' nests."Jane was glad to think of seeing"ever so many birds' nests," and as

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 37the shortened school-time of that dayhad enabled her to get well on withher work, she agreed to go. She wasnot very long with Mr. Adams, andcame out with a countenance brightand joyful." Oh, how very, very good God isto me " she cried, as soon as she hadjoined Annie.* "Mr. Adams has askedme to come to him every Monday andThursday evening, that he may teachme the many things I don't knowabout God and his will; and I don'twant anything in the world so muchas that. And a kind lady, whom hecalled his sister, asked me about mywork, and said that she could get mework to do, and be able to pay mebetter than the shop-people; and shesaid, too, that she should be glad toteach me to read when you could not.And if I get good pay, and have notthe school to pay, or to be so long

38 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.time at it, I'll get on so well, and beable to make mother quite as comfort-able as ever she was in the days Imade most.""Did you make more in Londonthan here ?" Annie asked, glad tocome back to the subject about whichshe was so curious. "What did youdo ? How did you make moneythere ? "" Ever since I can remember," Janesaid, the brightness going at once outof her face, " I used to go out to begall day long. At first, when I wasvery little, I went with mother; andthen, as I got older, I went alone.""And did you, could you make somuch by begging ? " Annie asked,surprised."By begging, telling all kinds oflies to make people give, and often,often by stealing-' picking up littlethings,' as poor mother called it," Jane

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 89said, drooping her head under theshame and sorrow of the avowal."But did not you know it waswrong ?" Annie asked." "Not for a long time: there wasno one to teach me. But one day, along while ago, when I was still quitelittle, I begged from a young lady,who found out that I was telling lies,and she said to me, 'Don't you knowthat God is angry with you when youtell lies ?' And I, poor miserable child-I asked her, 'Who is God ? '""Oh! " cried Annie, shocked. "Didnot you know ? "" No," she answered with a kind ofpassion, " I didn't know who Godwas; think of that! I knew who thepolice were, and that it was best tokeep from making them angry; butI knew nothing at all about God, orabout his anger against sin. A crowdcame past just after I had asked the

40 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.lady who God was, and she was hur-ried away before she could answer;but the look in her face, the sorrow,the fear, as I thought, when I saidthe words, made me think that Godmust be some very great person, andthat it must be very terrible to makehim angry. I asked everybody I knewfor many and many a day after that ifthey knew God; but some said theydidn't, and some were angry and bademe hold my tongue, and I never couldmeet my young lady again to tell me.""And then did you forget about it ?""No, I couldn't forget; a drearyfeeling always came over me when Ithought of that lady's frightened, sor-rowful look-it was as if she had seensome one going to kill me. I wishedso much to know God; and I nevercould again tell lies, because she hadsaid that made him angry, and I didnot know but that he might be near

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 41me, and hear me, and so I was afraid.Mother was very angry because Iwould not tell lies, for I never gotmuch by begging when I only toldthe truth; and she used to try tomake me-to beat me, and let me gofor a day at a time without anythingto eat. And I was so unhappy, thatI often thought I'd do as she bademe; but always when the time cameI couldn't-I was afraid. I did notknow who God was, or whether heheard me or not, and I never couldget out the lies when I thought thatmaybe he did hear; and I could neversteal after that. I don't know that Icould have found out for myself thatit was wrong to tell lies, but wheneverI thought about it, I knew that it waswrong to steal. The things were notmine, and I had no business withthem: I saw that, and was afraid totake them."

42 THE HEAD OR THE HEART." And did your mother give up try-ing to make you ? "" For a long, long time she didn't,or if sometimes for a day or two shelet me alone, then a day would comewhen she wanted gin very sorely, andshe'd be harder than ever. But aftera long time a girl called Ellen cameto live in our house, and she turnedto be such a happiness to me.""Did she know God?" Annie asked."No; but she was quiet and kind,and like nobody I had ever been withbefore. I liked to sit beside her when-ever I could; she had been better offonce, and had learned to sew beauti-fully. I liked to see her needle goso quickly out and in, and to watchthe pretty things she made. Onceshe had made a great deal of moneyby the trimmings, and collars, andsleeves that she sewed; but when shecame to us she was ill and weak, and

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 43could not work long, and so she hadgot poor, and that was why she hadcome to live in our miserable place.She taught me to sew too; she tooka great deal of pains to teach me, andshe said that I learned very quickly..And so I was soon able to make agreat deal, and mother got to bebetter pleased with me."" Could you make more then thanyou had done by begging ? ""Not than I had once done. WhenI was very little they say I waspretty," Jane said, looking down witha smile upon her long, awkward limbs;"and when I was sent out in the coldand wet with very little upon me, andtold dismal stories, people were verysorry, and often gave me a great deal.Even when I got to sew well andquickly, I couldn't make so much asthat; but I made a good deal, andpoor mother got to be pretty well

44 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.content, and we went on happier to-gether; but all the time poor Ellenwas getting worse and very weak.Often she could not go out about ourwork. I could take the finished workto the shops, but I did not do so wellabout taking orders, and Ellen alwaystried to go for that herself. One day,when she was very weak, she had gone,and she had got so weary she couldhardly walk. Crossing the street, shecouldn't get fast enough out of the wayof a carriage, and she was knockeddown. She was not much hurt, butonly so shaken and frightened that Idon't think she ever got the better ofit; but she always said that fall wasthe one greatest blessing of her life.The carriage was full of ladies. Theywere so sorry that they got out to seeto her themselves; they sent her homein a cab, and one of them came thatvery day to ask about her. I was

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 45with Ellen, and oh!" Jane cried,interrupting herself, "what a bless-ing God sent us in that goodlady!""Was she your lady who told youthat God would be angry with you ?"Annie asked eagerly."No. But she must have been thesame kind of lady, for so soon as shehad asked about Ellen's health, andabout how she and I lived, and hadsettled to send the things Ellen wanted,and to get a doctor to see her, she be-gan to ask us about God. And whenshe found that we knew nothing abouthim, she came every day to teach us;and oh, what she taught us! Shetaught us who God is, and what heis-how glorious, and holy, and hatingsin with a holy and a great hatred.She made us feel that we were terriblesinners in God's sight, and she told uswhat Christ had done and suffered for

46 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.miserable sinners like us-for his ene-mies, for those who despised and hatedhim. She told us how he had left hisglorious home in heaven, and comedown to this earth to be made one ofus, and been cold, and hungry, andfaint, and weary, for our sakes, andbeen spitted upon, and cruelly usedby men whom he came to save; andhow he died upon the cross for us;and how all our sins were counted tohim, and all the wrath and curse ofGod for our sins was poured out uponhim; and how he was in an agony ofsoul for the fearful weight of sins thatwas put upon him, and that he waswilling to bear it so that we might gofree; and how, when he cried out, 'Itis finished !' then an end was made ofour sins for ever, and God cast thembehind his back, so that they couldnever more be found or be brought upagainst us."

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 47She spoke so eagerly and with suchintense feeling that breath failed her,and she was obliged to stop for a mo-ment. Annie looked curiously at her;she hardly understood her. Never hadshe felt so much about these things.Jane caught the look." 0 Annie Scott !" she cried, withgreat feeling, " you have known thesethings all your life, you can hardlythink what it was to us to hear themfor the first time. Oh, the day whenshe told us that all Christ's holinesswas counted to us, and that God, forChrist's sake, loved us even as heloved Christ, I thought I could notstand it. I cried it could not be true-it was too good to be true. Thenshe read it out of the Book which shehad told us was God's own word: shesaid that it was the blessed Christhimself who had said it. Then weknew that it must be true, only it was

48 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.too great, too grand, we could not takeit in; and Ellen said that for all herpain, and her weary, weary days andnights, she'd like to live ever so manyyears that she might think about it,and go about and about it, and get itinto her heart. And when the ladytold her that she should think aboutit and learn about it for ever inheaven, she sat right up in bed, andclasped her hands above her head, andcried out, 'Oh, and then I shall havea bigger heart and be able to knowmore about it!' nd ever from thatday she wished so much to get awaythat she might get a bigger heart, andbe able to love Christ, and to knowhow much he loved her."" And did she soon go away "" She was not long after that. Andoh, God was so good that he allowedthe lady to stay in town and come tosee us, till the very day before Ellen

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 49died, and then she was obliged to goaway."And you were left alone," Anniesaid compassionately." I didn't feel alone. I always feltthat God was beside me' after that.And though I did want sorely to havesome one to read God's words to me,and to tell me. more about him, yetGod taught me so many new things,and great things, out of what I hadheard, and made them all so real tome, that I couldn't ask anything more.I minded words that the lady had read-how Christ had promised that theHoly Ghost should take of the thingsof Christ and Show them to us, and Ifelt that it was all true, gloriouslytrue, for that he did it to me.""Didn't you go to church ? Youwould have learned more there," Anniesaid."I didn't know what church was,"4

50 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.said Jane. "Once the lady advisedme to go to church, but I didn't knowwhat she meant, and hadn't time toask. One day I passed a church whenthey were singing, and I liked thesound and went in; and oh, what thatwas to me The prayers, the sermon,-I can never forget them. Theminister said the text so often thatI got it learned, and it was my greatestcomfort ever after. The words were,' He that spared not his own Son, butdelivered him up for us all, how shallhe not with him abo freely give us allthings?' You can't think how muchthese words have been to me eversince!""Did you never go back to hearmore ?"" I went back and back, times andtimes ; but I knew nothing aboutchurches. I didn't even know thatit was on Sunday they were open,

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 51and so I never got back at the righttime all the times I tried. We didn'tstay very long in London after that.I couldn't bear to live with all thesewicked people, and to see their wicked-ness and to hear it. They did notknow a God to love, but they knewa God to curse and blaspheme; andI couldn't stand it. I thought some-times it would kill me; most of all,when poor mother had taken too muchgin, and cursed like the rest. And Ikept begging her to come away fromthat horrible place, and praying to Godto make her ready to go. And Goddid make her ready. A woman cameup from the country to our place, andshe told mother that it wvas much betterto live in the country, and that every-thing cost less money there, and so shewas willing, and we came away.""And why did you come here?"Annie asked.

52 THE HEAD OR THE HEART."We wandered on seeking a quietplace where I might hope to get work,and came here on a Sunday afternoon.I did not know anything about Sundaysthen, you know," she said, in answerto a look of wonder from Annie. " Ididn't know but that we might travelone day as well as another. When wepassed the church the door was open,and we went in; and when I heard Mr.Adams preach, I thought that I shouldlike so very much to live where I couldhear him always. As we went throughthe town seeking a quiet, cheap placeto sleep in, we came to that cottage inthe lane. A woman lived there alone,who took us in for the night.""Oh, I remember," interruptedAnnie; "a Mrs. Grey, a soldier'swife, lived there for a short time,and went away in a great hurry tojoin her husband.""Yes," Jane went on. " In the

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 53morning, when I asked her aboutstaying on here, she told me that shehad heard from her husband on theSaturday that his regiment had comeback from foreign parts to England,and that he wanted her to come tohim. She had paid a year's rent, andas she was in a great hurry to getaway, she said I might have the housefor the rest of the year for only tenshillings.""And had you ten shillings ?" Annieasked, looking down at Jane's poor,scanty clothing."Yes ; before we left London Iworked very, very hard. I got agreat deal sold there, and had themoney to bring, besides several piecesof trimming to sell as we came along.I took them to the better houses inthe villages, and to the grand gentle-men's places, and sold nearly all ofthem. They were very much thought

54 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.of. At first I asked the same pricethat the shop-people gave me; but alady told me that it was far too little,and she changed all the prices for me,making some of them twice or threetimes more; and I got the high pricequite easily, and grew very rich. AfterI had paid the ten shillings, and a littlemore for an old bed, table, and stool,that Mrs. Grey did not want to takewith her, I had enough to buy an oldeasy-chair for mother from a man inthe village, and a nice soft cushion forthe back. I had still two pieces oftrimming, and I took them to Mr.Green, and he bought them, andordered more, and gave me a dozenshirts to make-coarse shirts withlittle work, which I got done soquickly you cannot think. Then whenI found that I could keep mothercomfortable, and pay for a month'sschooling too, I was so glad. I did

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 55so want to learn to read God's Word,and He made it so easy for me tobegin to learn. I think nobody inthe world is so well off, or has thingsgo so well as I have. I have every-thing I want now."Annie was silent. She thought ofthe many blessings and comforts of herhome, and her conscience remindedher how often she felt unhappy anddiscontented among them all." And do you get on at school as fastas you like?" she asked after a minuteor two." In learning the Spelling-book, Mr.Jones says no one ever got on so fastbefore," Jane said modestly. "I sup-pose it is because God helps me somuch. When I asked him, I felt asif he would, and'I am sure he does.But there are some things that it isharder to learn than I thought it wouldbe."

58 THE HEAD OR THE HEART."What things ?" Annie asked."Why, you know, I never learnedanything out of the Bible before.There are so many things in it that Idon't know, and that even the verylittle ones know. And so when Mr.Jones speaks to you, and explains theBible, there are ever so many thingsthat I can't understand, and that hethinks you all know about; and thatmakes me sad and puzzled like oftenand often.""Why don't you ask people aboutthem ?"" I do ask Mr. Jones sometimes, andhe is very kind; but he is busy, andthere are so many things.""But we big girls could have toldyou if you had asked us," Annie said,with an air of superiority."Yes, I know that; but-but," shesaid, hesitating, "you-none of youseemed to like me."

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 57Again Annie's conscience spokeloudly, and reminded her how scorn-fully she had behaved to poor Jane."Ah," she cried frankly, "we didnot behave at all well. I am verysorry. But now, Jane, you can't beafraid to ask me."" No, not now," Jane said gratefully;"you are very kind."Her gratitude quickened Annie's re-morse."It was too bad of us," she said." Didn't you feel that it was very bad,and very hard of us ?""I did feel that at first," Jane an-swered with a smile; "and it was akind of comfort to keep saying to my-self that you were very unkind; butwhen Mr. Adams preached that Sun-day about God's telling us not to beangry with each other, I prayed toGod to keep me from thinking youunkind, and he did it. I have never

58 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.thought much about it since thatday."Again Annie was silent. Againshe contrasted Jane's conduct withher own in similar cases, and, curi-ously, there came into her mind therecollection that she had called thisgirl a disgrace to the school. Thegirls had talked so fast that they hadgone the wrong road, and found them-selves coming back to Deep Lane with-out having seen the birds'nests. Annieproposed that they should turn again;but Jane, looking at the sunset, said itwas time sh6 should be home to get hermother's supper. She began to walkvery fast, as if afraid of being too late."You need not be so particularaboutsuch a cross old patch. She can waita little, surely," said Annie." Why, you see," Jane answered, " Ican't give poor mother the only thingshe wants, and that is gin. I can't

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 59give it to her, because it makes herwild, and she says wicked thingsagainst God then. So, when I can'tgive her gin, I must make every-thing else as nice as I can for her.It is all I can do.""And that was why you bought aneasy-chair and a cushion for her, insteadof a new gown for yourself? " Annieasked." Oh," Jane said with a bright look,"I was so glad to get it. You can'tthink how happy I was when I saw herlie back so comfortably in it, and heardher say that it was so nice."" But, Jane," Annie asked, "did younever see your good lady again ?""No; she was called out of Londonin great haste, but she sent her maid tosee me, and to say that if I liked shewould take me to the country with her,and board me with a good old woman,and send me to school."

60 THE HEAD OR THE HEART."And did you hot like ?" Annieasked in great surprise."Like! yes, I should think so," Janeanswered, smiling; "but you see I couldnot go. I could not leave mother, nowthat she can't work for herself. Thelady once told me that God had said,'Love your neighbours as yourself,'andso I knew that he must wish me to doeverything I possibly could for her.""You are very good, Jane," burstfrom Annie. "Every one does notdo what they know God wishes themto do.""Don't they? " Jane asked, stand-ing still to look more earnestly for ananswer. "Ah, I think they must. Iknow so little of what God wishes meto do, that I am glad to do the littlethat I know to the very best I can.O Annie, don't you know what a joyit is to me to know of anything thatGod wishes me to do, when he loves

THE HEAD OR THE HEART. 61me so much. How can I help doingit with all my heart!"They had reached the cottage, andJane went in at once. Annie lookedafter her, and again the words, "Dis-grace to the school," came back uponher mind."How little I knew," she thought,"when I said that. I wish I werelike her."She might have wished it more couldshe have followed Jane into the house,and watched her patience and gentle-ness with the poor, cross old woman.She had been so very cross that daythat Jane fancied she was missing hergin more than usual, and the good,loving girl had bought an expensivedelicacy for her supper, resolving tolive upon dry bread for a day or twoto.make up for it. She cooked thesupper with the greatest care, andcoaxed the old woman to eat it with

62 THE HEAD OR THE HEART.beautiful kindness. And when atlast she got her into bed and asleep,and had eaten her own poor supperwith a thankful heart, she fairly burstinto tears of gladness as she thoughtof all the mercies of that day.It was a memorable day to bothJane and Annie. For Jane it broughtfriends who continued to love and serveher through all her life. And to Annieit brought the great blessing of mak-ing her feel, for the first time in herlife, the difference between knowingS God's will and doing it. For the restof that day, and for many days, hermind was very busy about Jane andher story; and, by God's blessing, theend of it was, that she gave herself norest until she had learned to know God,and to know herself even as Jane did.".'{'

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